REG: Really bad BIID breakdown

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Hi everyone:

Today I was forced to become verbal by an external vendor which triggered me wanting to take matters into my own hands to make myself permanently nonverbal thus I would no longer be able to be controlled in this manner. Well my threat of wanting to take matters into my own hands has landed me on a 72-hour hold for psychiatric evaluation. With me being autistic plus having to deal with the stress of being forced to be verbal was the last straw for me and I just threw my hands up and said “enough is enough I will not allow myself to be controlled anymore “

Wish me well in the psych ward and hope that one day I can be fixed in such a way as to be permanently nonverbal

Hugs:
CF

what's an external vendor?


why do you want to be nonverbal?

good luck in there. i've never been, but ive read plenty.

An external vendor is any person or organization that provides me with a product or service.

For more information on why I want to be permanently nonverbal see: viewtopic.php?t=353257&start=15#p7653096

Read the memo I link to and you will understand I hope

Quick Update:

I was never placed in a psych ward for further help thanks to 1) there being no one who would accept me and the local psych hospital being at max capacity, but also 2) be effectively getting a lecture from both my mom and my therapist about needing to stay out of the psych ward else I might be conserved and lose all my fredom. so no help for me and that memo still is true to this day.

...Did uou write this from within the psych ward?
They allow you Internet access there?







fleischmann"]Hi everyone:

Today I was forced to become verbal by an external vendor which triggered me wanting to take matters into my own hands to make myself permanently nonverbal thus I would no longer be able to be controlled in this manner. Well my threat of wanting to take matters into my own hands has landed me on a 72-hour hold for psychiatric evaluation. With me being autistic plus having to deal with the stress of being forced to be verbal was the last straw for me and I just threw my hands up and said “enough is enough I will not allow myself to be controlled anymore “

Wish me well in the psych ward and hope that one day I can be fixed in such a way as to be permanently nonverbal

Hugs:
CF[/quote]

[/quote]

getting into an actual psych ward is harder than you'd might think in this county. First I need to call the police to take me to the Crisis Stabilization Unit (CSU) where they will evaluate me and if I meet criteria, they will either 1) place me on a 72-hour involuntary psychiatric hold and keep me in CSU for up to 23 hours and keep me in the local psych facility once my 23 hours in CSU ends providing there is a bed available or if no bed at local facility look for placement elsewhere. or 2) if their doctor thinks that I do not meet any of the criteria listen below, they will discharge me:

the Criteria are:
1) suicidal
2) homicidal
3) gravely disabled (e.g. cannot provide own food, clothing, or shelter)

At the time this thread went Live, I was in CSU awaiting placement because the local psych ward was full. In CSU they will let me keep my phone (thus internet access) and one of my iPads (thus I have a way to communicate that is preferable to me)

As stated in my update, I never got shipped of to anywhere for the above mentioned reasons. Hope that clarifies your question.

...Well, I guess things have changed, and, sort of (not exactly) luke Trump complaing aboutthe NFL trying to redu e footbalk concussions...I aszociate thd loony bin with, at leasg first, everything being taken away from you at yku being in a locked room ...Even later whsn you perhaps have " more freedom ", having tonz of Thorazine and Mellaril and the like forced on you ...More later ...............................

what you describe is what they picture in the movies. And often is the case, what is depicted in the movies, and what actually happens i real life and as different as night and day.

...IT'S. WHAT HAPPENED. TO. ME.
I guess I did not absolutely spell that out ......... .

Oh my Winx! I'm sorry that happened. I am not a huge fan of psychiatry and mental health in general due to how I was treated in one loony bin for being nonverbal (read: beaten up, restrained, drugged, denied water all because I was nonverbal and typing on an iPad and not giving them the iPad like they kept demanding.) They were demanding but not giving my any alternative way to communicate... just imagine being without a way to communicate and I'm sure you wouldn't want to give them the tablet either. I still have physical scars and physical pain in addition to severe PTSD because of this incident which we call internally "The hospital incident".


Like I said I am not a big fan of psychiatry because of it, further for me at least the medications they put my on made the symptoms worse rather than better. As a result, I don't believe in psych medication but only in talk therapy or similar. if they can give me a scientifically backed evidence based reason for using medication that makes the situation worse rather than better.