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wachterhector
Butterfly
Butterfly

Joined: 17 Oct 2017
Gender: Male
Posts: 12

20 Oct 2017, 8:38 am

I also don't have a lot of friends. I have some but they are virtual. I've never seen them in my real life, only through the skype. I have some acquaintances but they are not my friends. We don't spend time together, don't watch Netflix or just talk. They only can help me with my home work or something like this. :cry:



Luna035
Raven
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Joined: 29 Jan 2017
Gender: Female
Posts: 112

22 Oct 2017, 6:44 am

icechai wrote:
I have achieved one official friend, who is also my fiance. I met him 12 years ago at a summer job. I approached him as he was the most adorable person I had ever seen, and introduced myself. He is still very adorable in demeanor...

I am happy for you.



kkouhxai
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

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Joined: 17 Oct 2017
Age: 22
Gender: Female
Posts: 3
Location: England, UK

22 Oct 2017, 7:38 am

I have two friends, it took me a while to become friends with them both though.



Last edited by kkouhxai on 22 Oct 2017, 8:59 am, edited 1 time in total.

RandomFox
Toucan
Toucan

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Joined: 30 Oct 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 265
Location: UK

22 Oct 2017, 8:11 am

I have a few friends, two close ones (one I call my brother) and then people I go out with sometimes or chat online (but we met in real life). I think my friendships were deeper when I was a kid, later people became more and more superficial and me - more and more socially inept.
I also go to all sorts of local meetups, but I haven't really made any close friends.
I quite enjoy times with no social contact at all and I don't need much socialising, so maybe it's me who somehow pushes people away sometimes.

I've never had a social circle or a group, it's always been 1-on-1.



wachterhector
Butterfly
Butterfly

Joined: 17 Oct 2017
Gender: Male
Posts: 12

25 Oct 2017, 6:54 am

I have many online friends, but unfortunately I don't have true friends in my real life!



Error0101
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

Joined: 27 Jan 2017
Age: 23
Gender: Male
Posts: 2
Location: Grape Creek, Texas

27 Oct 2017, 11:50 am

Just watch anime. Anime won't fill that whole, but it'll help. Then meet someone who mentions anime and cling on to them for all of high school. Yup, that seems about right.



aikoinazuma
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

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Joined: 12 Feb 2017
Age: 42
Gender: Female
Posts: 127

02 Nov 2017, 10:18 pm

I have no friends and haven't since 1996. I gave up trying to make them about a couple of years after that. I'm so used to being a loner that I can't imagine anything different than that. Just saying the truth, not trying to play fiddle to anyone.


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Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 107 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 131 of 200
You seem to have both neurodiverse and neurotypical traits.


Almost
Hummingbird
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Joined: 3 Nov 2017
Gender: Male
Posts: 22
Location: Michigan

03 Nov 2017, 1:09 am

I don't have many close friends in real life. I have a few folks online I communicate with that I can talk about real stuff like emotional distress, goals, and thoughts with but even then it's scarce. I spend a lot of time in my head, talking to myself sorta. I don't go to school or anything either so I'm really not around people and when I am we don't usually "click" well because of me just being the social buffoon I tend to be. I swear I'm a friendly person though, lol.



Fig Putin
Emu Egg
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Joined: 3 Nov 2017
Gender: Male
Posts: 8
Location: Mistake by the Lake

03 Nov 2017, 1:40 am

There are four people that I call my friends. The first two I made were from when I was in third grade and preschool. The third was in middle school. I said something about us having the same classes, introduced myself, and we were instant best friends. Fourth was in high school. We were Facebook friends already when we bumped into each other. She's an extrovert so she adopted me as a friend. Definitely get an extroverted friend. She really changed me for the better by teaching me how to not be so awkward around people.



EverythingAndNothing
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

Joined: 7 Jul 2017
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 133

04 Nov 2017, 8:29 pm

I've never had a friend in real life because I've just never been able to figure out how to make one. There was a point during my teens when I was very close with someone online but that fizzled out and we no longer even talk. I have a partner but even we're not all that close compared to how most people seem to be with their significant others.

I've recently started trying to invite people to things again, but I always just get rejected and I can't figure out what it is about me that turns people away. They seem to like me well enough as an acquaintance but not as anything more. I honestly don't think I'll ever make a friend. If I'm 26 years old and I haven't made one yet, it seems unlikely that I'm going to suddenly figure it out.



ProximaCentauriB
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

Joined: 4 Nov 2017
Gender: Female
Posts: 2

05 Nov 2017, 9:56 am

Never had any friends growing up. Luckily, I have a few now, but we don't see each other very often since they all live abroad (I met all of them online initially). I've had to move again about half a year ago, but no luck at my new place so far. Whenever I try to make friends in real life, people just stop talking to me at some point. Kind of wish I knew why :huh:



CyclopsSummers
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Joined: 21 Jun 2008
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,172
Location: The Netherlands

05 Nov 2017, 3:33 pm

EverythingAndNothing wrote:
I've never had a friend in real life because I've just never been able to figure out how to make one. There was a point during my teens when I was very close with someone online but that fizzled out and we no longer even talk. I have a partner but even we're not all that close compared to how most people seem to be with their significant others.

I've recently started trying to invite people to things again, but I always just get rejected and I can't figure out what it is about me that turns people away. They seem to like me well enough as an acquaintance but not as anything more. I honestly don't think I'll ever make a friend. If I'm 26 years old and I haven't made one yet, it seems unlikely that I'm going to suddenly figure it out.

You are not alone. I am 30 going on 31, and I have struggled in my attempts to find friends throughout my 20s. My latest puzzling experience was with a co-worker with whom I seemed to share a number of common interests, seemed to get along with excellently, and actually did spend an evening with, which we both seemed to enjoy. After exchanging contact information, over a month has passed that there has been no correspondence from their part. And so it goes. It seems that people are fine talking to me for a while, but I'm not friendship material in their eyes. I also don't think I'll ever figure it out.


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saimand
Raven
Raven

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Joined: 23 Jun 2013
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 102
Location: Zagreb

09 Nov 2017, 6:25 pm

I dont have 'real' friends,I live in my own little world which is mostly sad because at age 25 you realize if you dont have friends or at least a friend , its gping to be sad and lonely life to live


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firemonkey
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Joined: 23 Mar 2015
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,570
Location: Calne,England

09 Nov 2017, 9:00 pm

Have not had a friend IRL since my wife died 12 years ago. Over 60 years have had less than a handful of friends . Have got a clue how to initiate them.



TheSilentOne
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Joined: 10 Aug 2015
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Posts: 2,820
Location: Torchwood Three

15 Nov 2017, 11:06 am

Right now, I have two people I would consider "friends". There was a third, but we have grown apart as she has changed a lot and is now doing things that go against my beliefs. I have some online friends too. I have a few imaginary friends though that I am very close with and I spend almost all my time with. We do just about everything together and I don't know what I would do without them.


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Kiki1256
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Joined: 13 Oct 2012
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Posts: 815
Location: Somewhere...

16 Nov 2017, 10:16 am

One of the biggest myths is that not having friends means people don’t like you. Even if people like you a lot, it takes guts (and social skills) to get out, talk to people, and make connections. Talk to new people and don’t be afraid to make mistakes. You may accidentally embarrass yourself because of Asperger’s related reasons, but if people are nice and worthy of being your friends, they won’t judge. Then decide which people you like the most and hang out with them. It’s tough to do but not impossible...I used to be friendless and now I’m social.