Are Restaurants Hard for You?

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What is hard for you at going to a restaurant? Here are my main things:
1. Noise
2. Crowded
3. Smell
4. Reading the menu
5. Waiting
6. Finding something to eat that I like
7. Ordering my drink and food
8. Interaction with others
9. Sharing the appetizers
10. Sitting still
11. Cutting my food
12. Keeping my napkin on my leg
13. Trying new food (something I have to do on my new diet)
14. Going to a restaurant I have never been to before
15. Sticky tables and sticky menus
16. Table manners

Usually I panic midway through and I have to go sit in the car.

Sport bars can be a bit hard, but normal restaurants are tolerable.

Given that my cries for help are understood about as often as those of the cattle in the local auction yard, I regard almost all restaurants as macabre morgues, which ruins my appetite for a couple of hours. If I smell a barbeque or bacon, I feel violated and have to flush my nose with water.

worrying about who will pay, and how to split the tab

precious lil "people" have the nerve to squeal "eeewww!", when i eat in a way they do not like

precious lil "people" have the nerve to remark and ask nosy questions about what i ate. "are you a vegetarian?".

the impulse to gorge or pressure to eat more than necessary, b/c of having to sit at the table longer

not having anything i like or want to eat

getting pressured to eat something i do not want

social interaction

I voted, "most of the time", but the only troubles for me
1. Noise - Multiple conversations happening, (plates, utensils clanking really sucks))
2. Commotion - People moving around, gesturing, kids running around
3. Focus/listening - Trying to hear someone talk to me when everyone else is talking
4. Anxiety - Standing in line/going up to line in a buffet setting.

It's uncomfortable, but manageable. I just wouldn't go alone.

Exuvian



It's better when I am alone

Noone commenting on what I ate or how I ate it

No awkward conversation

To clarify, I don't mean with a whole group. Me and 1 or 2 family members is best. Good to have a buffer from feeling like I'm alone under a spotlight, and having to exclusively interact with the waiter.

I put "Most of the time". Fortunately, most of the restaurants I've gone to are petty laidback or not too loud. I recently went to a restaurant that made me have to plug my ears the whole time and nearly put me into shutdown. Usually, the biggest problems for me are the noises (lots of people talking is the absolute worst), anxiety (being around a lot of people), and when I have to talk to people and can't make out what they're saying because of all the other conversation going around.

I do work the night shift for both my jobs so luckliy when I goto a restaurant I don't see very many people. It's when there are a large number of people in any place really that over-stimulation, aggression and frustration factors tend to spiral out of control for me.

Most of the time I'm okay with it. I wear my shades and earphones to block out a lot. If it's someplace I've been I always have the same dish. If not I usually study the menu online ahead of time. Most of the time it's okay. Sometimes it's a bad experience. Being in the school cafeteria is often worse.

The only thing that bothers me in a restaurant are when people bring their babies/toddlers in.

I'll assume we're talking about restaurants in general and not just fancy ones, correct me if I'm wrong.

For me, noise is also a problem to a certain extent. Normal noises of people eating and having a conversation aren't a problem, but if there are some really loud people, usually little kids or a group of teens, it gets on my nerves.

As for the place being crowded, it doesn't bother me as long as the place isn't so crowded that I can't find a seat where I don't have to sit next to a stranger. Even if that happens it doesn't usually cause any kind of melt down, though. Also, crowded means more noise and even if everyone is talking normally it can still be too much. Usually I take my time eating and go things over in my head, but if it's that kind of situation then I focus on eating and leave as soon as I'm done.

Waiting can also be a problem for me... ten to twenty minutes is very basic and while it can be boring or annoying, it doesn't cause any big problems, just... if it goes well beyond what I'm used/what I expected it to it leaves a bad taste (figuratively.) And of course, it adds stress if I'm in a hurry.

Finding something to eat that I like is also a problem sometimes. If I go somewhere alone then I can just check the menu and if nothing sounds like I'd like it then I just leave, but if I'm with people I have to go with what sounds the best even if nothing actually sounds good or not eat at all.

Ordering used to be a really big problem for me in my early teens. I think it was mostly because we lived in a rural area, so everytime I ate out it was with my mom/dad/sisters/some relative etc. and I didn't really know what to do since I hadn't had a chance to practice. Of course I could've learned by following how others did it (and that is how I later learned), but that hadn't oocured to me until after I had to order on my own a few times. These days it's only a problem if I have to ask some specific questions about what I'm ordering, like if it's suitable for a lactose intolerant like myself or if it's possible to leave out the tomatoes. This becomes even more akward if the person taking the order doesn't know and has to go ask someone.

I also have a problem with trying new food, mostly because I don't want to pay for something when I don't know if it's worth the money or not, but I also don't like the idea of having to leave things I dind't like after all on my plate and getting comments on it.

Going to restaurants I haven't been to before is also a problem since I don't really know what's good and what's not, or if the place has anything good to eat in the first place. I also tend to wonder if it's okay to ask them to leave something out that would normally go to my food or not.

Formal restaurants are also scary for me, especially since I never go alone to those. When it comes to junk food or normal restaurants I usally test them on my own and confirm that the menu has something good to avoid embarrasing situations before going with anyone else. However I can't really afford formal restaurants on my own and am not exactly interested paying a lot about something that I could easily make at home for a lot lower price. So, when I go to one there are the new place problems plus the problem of how to act differently. Last time I went to a formal restaurant with my family, the waitress brought us a can of water and other drinks to the table. I took the can and poured a glass for myself when she was serving the others at our table. By the look on her (and my mother and half sister's) face I concluded that I did something wrong when it came to etiquette... I suppose I was supposed to wait for her to pour me a glass.

Also, there's this thing about my more or less weird eating habits sometimes, like the way I eat a hamburger. I always eat the edges first. If I had a reason when I started eating that way then I've forgotten it by now, but I still do it. Sometimes, when I'm in the company of someone who doesn't really know me yet and who I don't want to think of me as too weird to hang out with I force myself to eat normally, simply because that's the easiest way to handle the situation.

So yeah, I have many problems that someone might find weird but whatever; that's how my life is. And this thing with restaurants is just a tip of the iceberg.

I didn't vote as not Dx but 1,3 & 4 pretty much sums up my experiences in restaurants and I would rather starve than dine alone.

It's very uncomfortable for me and I would say manageable but the experience can take some time to recover ( I'm guessing that's just anxiety though )

I've just read Fireblossom's post before posting and it reminded me that I may have an issue with places that I haven't been before due to being a picky eater and finding something I like - I tend to stick to the same thing every time I eat out , if I deviate and try something new I always regret it ( I'm a creature of habit especially with my taste buds ) - this is not really a problem on it's own but can ruin a meal when added to the above ^

This was always an issue for me before I met my GF but she has taught me a lot about restaurants and being a customer , although sometimes it's embarrassing for me to ask for half the ingredients to be left out of a dish , I am much better than I used to be but sometimes I can't do it and have to have offending items on my plate due to not speaking up for myself

I don't like it when there's loud music or loud conversations. I don't like the concept of being "waited on" too much. I'm not very patient when it takes too long for the food to come.

The school cafeteria is a madhouse. The noise, the smells, the bright fluorescent lights, the people bumping into you, the waiting in line, etc. I'm glad to be out of school.