Parents told me I was possibly autistic?? I'm 21

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waterlow4487
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17 Oct 2017, 8:05 pm

Hi all,
My parents told me a few days ago that they think I might be on the mild spectrum of Aspergers Syndrome or Autism, or in their words, "Be a little autistic." I didn't think much of it at the time and kind of agreed with them. I know you can't rely on these tests obviously, but I took two online Aspergers' Tests and one of them said I could possibly be in the mild Aspergers spectrum and the other said I was within range of being diagnosed with Autism or Aspergers and that it would be wise to follow up with a clinician, and now I'm kind of freaking out. What if I am on the mild spectrum? I'm 21 years old, an adult, have I lived my life this whole time without knowing something that could explain a lot of why I am the way I am?? I know I would need an official diagnosis, but is it reasonable to be kind of worried/freaking out a little?



Canadian Penguin
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17 Oct 2017, 8:32 pm

Nothing will change. Having a diagnosis does not change how you think or act. You will be the exact same person before the "you're on the Autism spectrum" as you are after.

You will an answer, an explanation and will be able to seek out the support that's available.

It's entirely your choice on what happens next. You don't have to do a thing with the diagnosis and continue on as you have been.

What I'm trying to say is there is nothing to fear and you need not worry.


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Esmerelda Weatherwax
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17 Oct 2017, 8:45 pm

Hi. I'm 62, was confirmed Aspie at age 55. Had a pretty good life up to that point and a better life, in several ways, after, because I knew for sure, instead of suspecting. Seconding what Canadian Penguin says - you won't change, this won't modify who you are at center. And adding, this is a situation in which knowledge really can be power.

Wishing you luck and most importantly peace.


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geod23
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17 Oct 2017, 10:54 pm

Hey, dude! Nothing wrong with being a little different! It just means your brain analyzes things a little differently than most. It can also help explain if you've ever had trouble with lights, textures, sounds, smells, or understanding what the heck people mean when they're talking. If you do have it, it's required to put on your records just in case something ever does happen and somebody important (bosses, police, etc.) misunderstand what you're saying or your intentions. It's a bit helpful in my opinion to be able to say to someone "Hey, sorry if I say anything weird or offensive. I have a disorder that makes my brain work a bit differently." Saves me a lot of upset friends/family/coworkers. It's fine to be nervous, but you've lived with it your whole life, so nothing will change except for putting a name to it.



xatrix26
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18 Oct 2017, 1:36 am

I'm 42 now and I discovered only three months ago that I'm Autistic, more specifically Severe High-Functioning Asperger's Syndrome. The last 3 months have been the most traumatic of my life but I finally come to the point where I can accept my situation and seek to find a remedy or at least a way to manage it effectively.

But believe me it was like watching the movie "A Beautiful Mind" where Russell Crowe's character went his entire life thinking he was okay but then one day waking up in his twenties and discovered he was Schizophrenic. The shock his character experienced very much described my own situation. But thank goodness nobody gave me shock therapy because that's what they used to do to people like us Aspies.

There was a time not too long ago where Autism was mistaken for Childhood Schizophrenia. Psychiatric science has advanced somewhat since then thank goodness.

In fact, I haven't really gotten over the shock of accepting my situation and I'm still in acceptance mode because it has shaken most of my belief in my own life. And yet it all makes sense at the same time.

It's quite paradoxical.


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Embla
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18 Oct 2017, 4:25 am

I just recently found out that I'm on the spectrum as well (at 23), and I really understand the confusion. Identity crisis is a mild word for how I felt the first few weeks. As if my whole life up to this point has been a lie.
At first I was a wreck. I sought help to find the reason and cure for my anxiety, but learning I have AS meant that all the problems that I have won't go away with treatment or medication. I will always be like this. Which felt horrible at first.
However, now that it has been sinking in for a while, I couldn't be happier. Finally there's an explanation to why I've been feeling like this. And there's a really good reason to why all those things that are supposed to help with anxiety hasn't helped for me. Now I can find the right tactics that works for me, and for the first time I feel as if everything is going to be just fine.

It's still scary, and overwhelming. But I have also seen huge improvements in just a few weeks. I know myself better than ever before. I don't get breakdowns as often since I'm getting better at recognizing and identifying my emotions, which is making them easier to handle. After getting tips from other autists I have found things that helps calm me down when I need it. I don't feel so much pressure to act normal in public, which is also making me a lot less anxious(because I dare to stim when I want to). I'm more able to communicate with my boyfriend now that I realize that the NT way of doing it hasn't been working out.
I'm much more confident, as all the positive aspects of being on the spectrum is taking more space.

Everyone keeps telling me that I'm still the same person, but it's not really true. Yes, I'm still me, but a lot more myself. It's not that my life has been a lie. It's just more true from now on.



RandomFox
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18 Oct 2017, 5:16 am

waterlow4487 wrote:
What if I am on the mild spectrum? I'm 21 years old, an adult, have I lived my life this whole time without knowing something that could explain a lot of why I am the way I am?? I know I would need an official diagnosis, but is it reasonable to be kind of worried/freaking out a little?


Hey, there's no need to freak out and it's a perfect occasion to examine yourself. Get more information about yourself, ask yourself questions. If you have autistic traits - how do they influence your life? Are you struggling with something and it can be explained by being neurodiverse? Are you overly sensitive to some sensory stimuli?
You can connect with a community of people, like here, and ask questions, do some research.
Everything will be okay, even if initially it seems like a shock to you.



whatamievendoing
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18 Oct 2017, 6:07 am

waterlow4487 wrote:
What if I am on the mild spectrum?


Then you are. Simple as that. Don't let a condition define you, especially when you're not yet even sure as to whether you have it or not.


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18 Oct 2017, 11:26 am

I am still me but I have a much better idea of who me is.


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18 Oct 2017, 11:32 am

A diagnoses greatly helped the relationship I had with my wife. Once we had that very important piece of information we both made accommodations but that doesn't necessarily happen when someone gets a diagnosis. Not only is denial common, but a lot of people don't want to change for the sake of a relationship. They want the other person to change.