Are paid dating sites worth it?

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sly279
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26 Oct 2017, 12:42 am

ZachGoodwin wrote:
I feel sleazy after reading that. I'm sorry for what you are going through.

Sorry. It sucks. I was super shy before wrong planet but now I wouldn’t ever approach women in person. I imagine women at my work also don’t want to be bothered by creepy loser.



MarissaKay
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26 Oct 2017, 12:55 am

sly279 wrote:
You’re female so it’s probably true,I and a lot of guys swipe right on everyone and new people get put up front. I have 20 likes over 10 years.
Likes is just here’s a picture of yiu and then guys swip right to like. Takes few seconds as most people don’t read profiles just pictures and swipe.


I may be female, but I'm a total nerd who doesn't wear make-up: hardly your definition of "drop dead gorgeous"! I'm also on the heavier side at the moment, so I really do think that most of the "likes" are actually bots. I read about it somewhere once.



Sweetleaf
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26 Oct 2017, 1:01 am

wouldn't have been for me...lol the guys on there probably would have seen me as too 'low of value' of dating material. Cause they would have totally wanted a nerdy girl living in her moms basement that can talk for at least a half hour of how they acquired the extended version of the first LOTR movie at a thrift store. But for whatever reason my boyfriend likes me anyways aside of my sometimes reoccurring repetitiveness.

Lol already feel like a failure, my freaking job has been giving me no hours...and I am too nervous to call them and ask if I can get some hours, lol maybe I can make myself do it...I mean what are they going to say 'oh we're letting you go' then I can just say 'ok fine' and apply somewhere else. Luckily my boyfriend understands that its difficult for me to confront something like that....but I still will need too make money for us to maintain rent so may have to seek a new job if they wont give me hours.


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Last edited by Sweetleaf on 26 Oct 2017, 1:10 am, edited 1 time in total.

sly279
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26 Oct 2017, 1:07 am

MarissaKay wrote:
sly279 wrote:
You’re female so it’s probably true,I and a lot of guys swipe right on everyone and new people get put up front. I have 20 likes over 10 years.
Likes is just here’s a picture of yiu and then guys swip right to like. Takes few seconds as most people don’t read profiles just pictures and swipe.


I may be female, but I'm a total nerd who doesn't wear make-up: hardly your definition of "drop dead gorgeous"! I'm also on the heavier side at the moment, so I really do think that most of the "likes" are actually bots. I read about it somewhere once.

If your comfortable sharing I could look at your profile and tell you :wink:
FYI bigger girls still get lots of attention. Bigger girls are still really pretty. Also nerdy girls are highly sought after in the new world where most men play video games.



sly279
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26 Oct 2017, 1:11 am

Sweetleaf wrote:
wouldn't have been for me...lol the guys on there probably would have seen me as too 'low of value' of dating material. Cause they would have totally wanted a nerdy girl living in her moms basement that can talk for at least a half hour of how they acquired the extended version of the first LOTR movie at a thrift store. But for whatever reason my boyfriend likes me anyways aside of my sometimes reoccurring repetitiveness.


Nerdy girls are really in right now and highly sought after.
Wish I could find s nerdy girl who lives at her parents and would date me.
Didn’t figure you for a nerd though since you are a metal rock girl.

All but eguys I onow in person and online want nerdy gamer girls. I dont know what jocks or outdoorsy guys want though.



MarissaKay
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26 Oct 2017, 1:19 am

sly279 wrote:
If your comfortable sharing I could look at your profile and tell you :wink:
FYI bigger girls still get lots of attention. Bigger girls are still really pretty. Also nerdy girls are highly sought after in the new world where most men play video games.


Meh, why not? Here's my profile: https://www.okcupid.com/profile/Hammianne

Most of the people who message me say things like, "hey", and more often than not have a seriously low match percentage with me. I always delete those on the spot and I've already had about 5 of those today alone. It's quite annoying since I personally always read profiles and look at pictures and questions.



sly279
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26 Oct 2017, 1:48 am

MarissaKay wrote:
sly279 wrote:
If your comfortable sharing I could look at your profile and tell you :wink:
FYI bigger girls still get lots of attention. Bigger girls are still really pretty. Also nerdy girls are highly sought after in the new world where most men play video games.


Meh, why not? Here's my profile: https://www.okcupid.com/profile/Hammianne

Most of the people who message me say things like, "hey", and more often than not have a seriously low match percentage with me. I always delete those on the spot and I've already had about 5 of those today alone. It's quite annoying since I personally always read profiles and look at pictures and questions.


See you’re actually quite beautiful. You don’t look too big either. About size I’ve dated and liked in past. Your voice is lovely too. Your profile is long and filled out, nice. I dislike women who like me and have empty profiles or very little , i dont know how to start talking to them.

The match percentage is meh. It’s not real science and we match 85% but doesn’t mean we’d get along. Profiles are better for that. I’ve seen women with low matches who profiles I highly like. They hey message might be cause they don’t think you’re reply, it sucks writing a long message spending hours writing and thinking it out just t be ignored. I’d prefer to send hey or how’s it going or one sentence comment on their profile. If they reply then I can chat more but if they don’t which most don’t then I didn’t wast my time, after they see my pictures they realize they don’t really like my looks. Others who’ve liked me or message me clresly didn’t read my profile. As they say they only date men with their life together and it’s pretty clear by my profile I don’t according to their standards. So I don’t bother with them.

You’re new to dating sites aren’t you? I use to do all that I’d read though a lot of their questions I’d spend hours on each profile before spending hours writing a message. After thousands of rejects I realized I was wasting huge chunks of my time. Easier to just swipe left or right then scrutinize the ones who like me back.

I dont know if I’d message you as yiu probably too good for me and I wouldn’t think you likely to message me back. If you’d like I can pm yiu my profile but I think it
Will be in your visited section

You’re really are quite pretty without makeup I wish more women wouldn’t use it.



Last edited by sly279 on 26 Oct 2017, 2:12 am, edited 1 time in total.

MarissaKay
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26 Oct 2017, 2:05 am

I have to admit, that was totally not what I was expecting to read at all!



sly279
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26 Oct 2017, 2:15 am

MarissaKay wrote:
I have to admit, that was totally not what I was expecting to read at all!

I hope that’s good :)
You shouldn’t feel ugly or lessor cause you’re not.



MarissaKay
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26 Oct 2017, 2:27 am

Well, thanks! :) That's very kind!



hale_bopp
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26 Oct 2017, 4:31 am

sly279 wrote:
hale_bopp wrote:
If you can’t make it work on a free account, you wont on a paid one. Don’t waste your money.

Probably but maybe women would message me cause they think I’m well of if I’m no there. I could maybe try to learn to lie?


That’s stupid. People who pay for dating site memberships just look desperate, unless you pay for use on a forum or something.

No female is going to like you more for being a paid member.

But in the end, it’s not my decision. Do what you want to.



The_Face_of_Boo
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26 Oct 2017, 4:37 am

Pay for gym instead.



hale_bopp
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26 Oct 2017, 4:48 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Pay for gym instead.


Or use the money to start saving for a car, as you’re so hung up on women apparently judging you for not having one.



Sweetleaf
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26 Oct 2017, 4:54 am

sly279 wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
wouldn't have been for me...lol the guys on there probably would have seen me as too 'low of value' of dating material. Cause they would have totally wanted a nerdy girl living in her moms basement that can talk for at least a half hour of how they acquired the extended version of the first LOTR movie at a thrift store. But for whatever reason my boyfriend likes me anyways aside of my sometimes reoccurring repetitiveness.


Nerdy girls are really in right now and highly sought after.
Wish I could find s nerdy girl who lives at her parents and would date me.
Didn’t figure you for a nerd though since you are a metal rock girl.

All but eguys I onow in person and online want nerdy gamer girls. I dont know what jocks or outdoorsy guys want though.


Lol not nerdy, metalhead girls though....I mean unless you want to hear about metal bands for 50 minutes or more and then pink floyd for another 70 minutes and at least a half hour about some kind of bug and its defense mechanism and how it could be applied to current technology.


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26 Oct 2017, 5:52 am

Paying to feed hypergamy and boost women's ego's?

They are sausage festivals like any other paid or free dating site.


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GiantHockeyFan
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26 Oct 2017, 7:25 am

Strictly my own experience but eHarmony not only provided better matches but they frequently contacted me. I still ran into the same problem in that online dating in general is like dating purgatory but at least women were regularly messaging me.

Still would not recommend either method: sure I met plenty of women but by the end it made me very jaded and bitter at how rude and flaky "most women" (or so it felt at the time) were. I can't tell you how frustrating how I would spend an hour answering questions during the guided communication phase while it was clear the woman was typing into her phone at a red light.

The plus side is that I learned to not really give a fig about being rejected.

hale_bopp wrote:
No female is going to like you more for being a paid member.

I disagree. I had a number of women comment that they chose eHarmony because they felt those that paid were taking it more seriously. Too bad they couldn't follow their own 'rules'.