How good are you with reading non-verbal cues?

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seahawksfan46
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21 Nov 2017, 3:52 am

I used to have issues with reading them, but now I can understand them with no issues whatsoever. Back when I was in grade school, however, they presumed that I was incapable of reading them based off of my results on the intelligence quotient tests that I was given every few years. I continuously divulged that it likely had to do with the fact that it was because I was never in enough social situations to get exposed to what most non-verbal cues look like, but they presumed that I was just saying this to attempt to get out of speech therapy (and that my theory as to why I got a low score in the social skills portion of the intelligence quotient test was insane).



xatrix26
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21 Nov 2017, 4:30 am

I am absolutely horrible at this. NTs pretty much have to be point blank and very blunt before I will get the message and sometimes their bluntness comes with a great deal of rudeness so they really don't know how to balance the two.

Misinterpreting social cues from NTs can turn into a big mess sometimes for me.


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EzraS
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21 Nov 2017, 4:59 am

xatrix26 wrote:
I am absolutely horrible at this. NTs pretty much have to be point blank and very blunt before I will get the message and sometimes their bluntness comes with a great deal of rudeness so they really don't know how to balance the two.

Misinterpreting social cues from NTs can turn into a big mess sometimes for me.


How does it go when you routinely interact with autistic people irl? What are the differences you have observed?



Embla
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21 Nov 2017, 5:42 am

I am getting better and better at it, since I started illustrating children's books. It forced me to learn a lot about body language and facial expressions, which I thought I was good at before I started studying it. But soon realized I was utterly hopeless.
Studying smileys helps me a lot.
I get the big expressions (happy/sad/angry) really well, but still have a lot of practice to do on the subtle ones.
Not only to learn what they look like, but apparently how to make them myself, too.
I had a photographer friend over the other day who needed me to model, and she told me to "look sceptic", and I was like "but how???"
We tried for a while, but that photo never happened.



xatrix26
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21 Nov 2017, 5:56 am

EzraS wrote:
xatrix26 wrote:
I am absolutely horrible at this. NTs pretty much have to be point blank and very blunt before I will get the message and sometimes their bluntness comes with a great deal of rudeness so they really don't know how to balance the two.

Misinterpreting social cues from NTs can turn into a big mess sometimes for me.


How does it go when you routinely interact with autistic people irl? What are the differences you have observed?


I honestly don't know anyone that's a verbal Autistic but I grew up with many non-verbal Autistic girls as my parents were Foster Parents. Nonverbal Autistics seem to be quite easy for me to understand as I could read their actions and we got along very very well. Once in awhile they could speak but it was extremely rare and even then we seem to be all on the same wavelength.


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MusicForTheMind
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21 Nov 2017, 6:08 am

I'm probably not that great at this....In fact, more likely awful.
I seem to only be able to process verbal communication, and when I do I take it 100% literally.
It's really not easy and can be very isolating.


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21 Nov 2017, 9:34 am

I guess I have a few skills at reading non-verbal cues, but there's a lot of uncertainty about it, so the information I get from it isn't of much use except as vague clues to what may be going on. I can usually tell when somebody is tense, euphoric, calm or upset. Sometimes I see cues that puzzle me. I remember when I was working, saying to my boss that I thought there might be some cheap ways of including me better, and as soon as I said the word "cheap," his face looked quite angry for a moment, and then back to normal. I still wonder why he looked like that. Maybe he thought I was about to say that the management's behaviour was cheap?



TheSpectrum
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21 Nov 2017, 9:52 am

Working in a bar has baptised me with non-verbal cues.
I don't get all of them but there are tell tale signs like, when it's your cue to leave or go over to somebody :P


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21 Nov 2017, 11:21 am

I used to think I was fine at reading them in grade school, but apparently everything went right over my head, and looking back now I can tell how socially "different" I acted and why I lost so many friends. I now think I read them pretty well for some reason, but I am probably missing things that I will realize 10 years later. I think it is pretty impossible to tell how good you are at reading nonverbal cues if you don't get them in the first place or have nobody telling you that you missed something.


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the_phoenix
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21 Nov 2017, 11:31 am

Just when I think I'm doing pretty good,
something happens to let me know
I've made yet another social blunder.

Or else, I'm just too slow at reading non-verbal cues
and by the time I figure it out,
I've already offended somebody without meaning to
or missed an opportunity to become somebody's friend.



kraftiekortie
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21 Nov 2017, 12:20 pm

Yep....I feel like that, too.

I become complacent...I believe I have "solved the riddle."

Yet.....soon I realize that the "riddle has solved me."

I screw up again!



jonny23
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21 Nov 2017, 1:01 pm

What are non verbal cues? Lol. Seriously though If they are screaming they are angry, if they are crying they are sad and if they are laughing they are happy. That's pretty much as far as I can get. Probably why I think people are angry all the time.



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21 Nov 2017, 1:05 pm

I used to struggle greatly with picking up on them, but my background in theatre has truly helped me in picking stuff up. I am not perfect however. Sometimes I find myself having picked up such a cue, but not sure of its exact meaning.



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21 Nov 2017, 1:16 pm

AspergersActor8693 wrote:
I used to struggle greatly with picking up on them, but my background in theatre has truly helped me in picking stuff up. I am not perfect however. Sometimes I find myself having picked up such a cue, but not sure of its exact meaning.


Yep, this resonates.



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21 Nov 2017, 1:21 pm

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Yep, this resonates.


Basically a seemingly unlimited number of possibilities come up in my head, and after a bit I just let it go because it takes too much personal energy to contemplate such a trivial thing.



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21 Nov 2017, 1:39 pm

Image
I understand this...everything else not so much. :lol:


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