Right now my bighest fears are...
Never being able to contribute anything to society or the people supporting me, having to survive by leeching off of others my whole life without anything to give back
Losing control of my hunting instincts, which have been really strong recently, and hurting someone/something
Being involuntarily admitted to a mental hospital, having my fate entirely in someone else's hands and not knowing when, if ever, I'd get out
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Yet in my new wildness and freedom I almost welcome the bitterness of alienage. For although nepenthe has calmed me, I know always that I am an outsider; a stranger in this century and among those who are still men.
-H. P. Lovecraft, "The Outsider"