Autistic and Widowed at 26

Post Reply New Topic

Hi marshmallows, my husband died when I was 27. He’d had cancer. I really feel for you and the experience is extremely frightening.

I tried to take one day at a time and not expect too much from myself. It is possible to learn to live with it and it gets easier as time goes on. I know it’s a cliched thing to say, but that is usually how it goes.

I’ll read the thread fully now, I just wanted to respond.

I'm not sure if this is the right location for this post.. or really even know what I want to say.
May 21st 2017 I lost the love of my life. I feel so... alone, even though my logical side knows I've got plenty who support me (I'm actually currently living with my in-laws, they've been the sweetest, and are really trying to understand what autism is for me, and how to best work together)

Have any of you ever gone through a similar situation? This is the one time where so many of my feelings are apparently "normal" and that in itself is rather hard to deal with.

We were together for 4 years, I knew him since I was 14, our relationship and how we met was definitely an interesting tangle.

I am the one who found him, and I tried to resuscitate him unsuccessfully. I had a PTSD dx to this prior, and recognize the patterns of what is going on now, and I'm trying to get help for it.
We'd been trying for our own children, without success, but I am very much still involved in my step children's lives.



I guess this is more of a blab/ rant... and a "someone who might understand please talk to me" sorta post.
many neurotypicals are trying to help, but some of the things they come out with... make me question who really has the empathy...

Thanks for reading...

Would he have wanted you to worry?

Honestly, I have never been married myself despite being the same age. I have lost family members in the past, but it tends to be a thing that my family manages to move on rather quickly, because we know that our lost loved ones wouldnt have wanted us to worry about their deaths and that we shouldnt mourn them for too long.

I think I responded to one of your posts previously.

I actually didn't know that you lost your husband. It must be devastating to you. Or I might have misinterpreted something. Now, it's clear.

I'm not going to say "at least you have your inlaws" or whatever.

I haven't been in precisely the same situation as you. But I've been in somewhat similar situations.

What I tend to do is to think about all the good times we had while we were alive. I am of the belief that most people don't really want you to mourn them---but want you to remember them. It would be a tribute to him if you remember all the good times you had, and that you cherish the memory of him.