I've never been harassed.

Post Reply New Topic

How are you going to produce evidence of incidents that happened prior to smartphones and cameras and recorders everywhere? This stuff often happened in private offices and if the abuser talked the abused into their home so very often it is a "he said she said" type situation. If you have more people coming forward against a person more chance that it actually happened.




^^^^
This
Also while all sexual abuse should have consequences there should be a difference in how a person who was too literally hands on a few times should be punished and a person who behaved liked Harvey Weinstein be punished.

**EDITED**
I was being b*tchy, and I don't excuse my bad behavior.

YOU stated as fact that thousands of these women are lying. Extraordinary claim, no evidence, I'm dismissing it.

Well, good for you!

Because you are living in an area and you frequent places which are wealthy, or middle classy, and inhabited by well educated and well cultured people, or perhaps you live in some rural town where men still have some code of honor - harassments are much more likely to happen in poor/ghetto urban places where men have gangsta attitudes, weed smokers, and poorly educated/raised.

Not all women are lucky as you though.

I'm glad you're not being harassed. You don't deserve to be harassed. You seem like a good/decent person.

It's good to consider contextual factors. Harassment doesn't occur in a vacuum.

I've lived all of my adult life in either Joplin and Springfield, Missouri, cities of around 50,000 and around 150,000 people, respectively. They are conservative, middle classy areas.

There have been times in employment where, statistically, I would have been considered vulnerable. When working in one of the school systems, I remember I had a temp assignment once as a sub where I had to go to different schools and take up computer equipment with a guy in his truck. Has this assignment for about a week and went to a bunch of schools in the area. I remember thinking when I was with the dude in the truck that it wasn't necessarily safe to be by myself with the dude in the truck. But he was professional and nothing weird happened at all.

Another time, as a direct care worker, I had male clients with mostly male staff. A few times I was on shifts where it was just me, two guys on staff, and three male clients in a residential care home. All kinds of weird could have theoretically happened there. But we just did our jobs and assisted the clients. Again, nothing happened.

So forgive me if I don't have this idea that all men are inherent rapists seeking to prey upon me at any given second. Maybe I'm lucky, maybe the men in this area are great, maybe I'm not conventionally attractive, maybe I dress modestly. Maybe it's a mix of all these factors. But yeah, I still haven't been harassed. This supposed universal experience of women, if you take the word of many SJWs, has never happened to me.

Is that an invitation? Send me a picture and some personal details and I'll harass you.

Did you like the way the men made fun of your looks kdm1984? If you didn't, guess what?

Where do I fit then? I'm neither a conservative Christian nor a mad hedonist. I'm neither a raging feminist nor a crazy chauvinist. Judeo-Christian society has not broken down - it has been strengthened with the rise of movements like Trump and Brexit. It's really the opposite of what you think. We're finally curbing some of the lunatic excesses and getting things under control. When I think of language like "Judeo-Christian society" I think Wilders. Which is not a bad thing, although sometimes he says things that are a bit far. A bit.

God is a book. I don't live my life by one book. I'm a student in life, but I don't live my life by a book. I live it by experience and satisfying myself and being with family and friends.

We're not believing that women are lower than men. They are on the same level. You don't need to lower your eyes when you talk to me.

Unsolicited criticism and mockery of your appearance actually is a form of harassment.

But if that's truly the worst you have ever experienced and it's not a matter of missed social cues, you are extraordinarily lucky. I am genuinely glad for you. No sarcasm whatsoever.

Maybe it's a combination of factors. Living in a nice area where you don't encounter a lot of lowlifes certainly helps. It can't hurt but I doubt dressing modestly really makes a great deal of difference. I've never been one to flaunt it. Most likely it's your demeanor and strong presentation.

Some of us are small, mousey, busty and seem to have giant targets painted on our backs that say, "Hey, predators, over here!" I have actually understated my experiences, which have been very unpleasant and in some cases terrifying.

Of course not all men are would-be rapists. That's just silly. But the problem of harassment is pervasive and while some lucky few such as yourself have not had to deal with it, to assert that since it hasn't happened to you other women must be exaggerating is both false and arrogant.

Lying about rape does not gain a woman status. In fact until rape shield laws came into effect a woman who reported a rape and brought it to trial could expect to be cross-examined by the defense as if she was the offender, not the other way around. They would ask about her sexual history, call her character into question, ask what kind of signals she was sending by her choice of clothing... there was good reason why so many rapes and harassment cases went unreported. They are still underreported because a lot of victims fear retaliation or the loss of their jobs.

I'm happy that you are able to feel safe and unthreatened.

A lot of us aren't.

I wouldn't be at all surprised if she isn't actually counting a lot of the harassment she has experienced and is instead counting it as something else.

you're very lucky, congratulations but it's very sad you're trying to use your experience to dismiss others woman experience. the fact that harassment is common doesn't mean every single woman in the world must face it, but a great number do. even if this number were just 1% of people, it would be too much. nobody should be harassed.

(i hope you don't have the same experience, but once i mentioned in this forum i was never catcalled and that i felt that when people said that all woman faced it i felt they were ignoring women who were ugly lol just for the next day i was coming back home late and i a guy in a car followed me for a while shouting that i was hot and should talk to him. it was frightening. i wonder that maybe my similar feeling that i never was harassed before came to the fact that i didn't paid attention to it.)

Maybe. Without any insult to the OP, it's worth thinking about.

When I was younger I missed a lot of social cues that now I would have recognized as harassment, aggression or outright danger signals. I'm sorry to say that I only learned to recognize these cues by harsh experience. Because I came across as meek and shy I was considered an easy target.

Just a small sample of these cues can be invading your personal space, looming over you, touching you in a non-overtly threatening way just to gauge your reaction or backing you against a wall, into a corner or confined space. These are often preludes to verbal or physical harassment, which at the time I misunderstood as simple compliments or insults or just being overly aggressive and touchy. Then there's common street harassment (comments or insults about one's body or appearance). If you respond in a way that brooks no nonsense that probably nips it in the bud and prevents it from progressing any further. Not everyone recognizes it or knows how to appropriately respond, particularly those with AS / ASD.

Cutting in for a split second is another one. There's a long list of them and I'm sure she isn't recognising them or is forgetting them.

Don't make too much of it, I guess Despite people making harassment out as male v. female behavior, it's really just sh***y human behavior. I'm male and I've been sexually harassed by women at pretty much every job I've had. I've also been groped by women in public. To this day, high school kids still diagnose me with things like, "Hey fa***t!" It's nice I can attract any predator, any time, anywhere.

Don't be a Wrigleys Juicy Fruit, tell 'em to piss off.