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u3694191997
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

Joined: 16 Aug 2017
Age: 27
Gender: Male
Posts: 6
Location: Ohio

17 Dec 2017, 10:35 pm

Hello all,
I have been on this forum for quite a bit of time now. This is my first post. Please forgive me if my grammar/spellings are off because i am not a native English speaker.

First, I wanna describe myself a little. I am now 20, moved to USA when I was 12. Currently attending a community college with a science degree. I am not super smart but i still do well in school. I am always good at math and science, but with art, music, language arts I am so bad with those. I remembered that in preschool- 2nd grade, people always say that you calculate this so quickly, how can you do that? I did won some math competitions of speed and accuracy, got first place. In art and music, I always get C or below. My creativity level is very low. I thought people with aspergers are bad at math, but good at art and music? I am completely opposite of that.

Social
I am a shy/quiet person, but i do have a few friend in my childhood. I think i have selective mutism. I don't talk freely outside of home. I am having trouble to make friends on the same gender. Most of my friends are girls, I don't know why I am attracted. I am best friend with a girl from first grade to 3rd grade. But after that, our relationship started to fall apart. Like we don't even talk anymore? I don't know why? Then I best friend with another girl, and it happened the same. It seemed like i can't hold a long relationship. I peed my pants a lot in kindergarten, I don't know how to ask to go to the bathroom? or I am scared to ask? I can't remember much. Right now, I don't have a friend at all. I don't have any interests of making friends. It seems like making friends to me is very stressful. "I have to deal with him, hang out with him, messing up my daily routine,w/e"

Interests
My interests are odd. I like buses and trains. I memorized each route. I also know the capacity of each fleet. I have a tendency of watching water dropping from the ac pipe at the rear end of the bus. I really like the engine sound.I like to learn about the weather. What I used to do is that I make I go on the weather website at least 10 times a day.
I never thought of myself would be on the spectrum until i did my research on autism. I always think that people with autism are severely impacted in their lives. I never thought of that high functioning/aspergers existed. I did heard of asperger before, people are making fun of it "ass-burger." So i thought to myself that it is a condition of you pooped out a burger??? That was a silly me. I did a lot of research on this, and some of the traits are describing me.
I don't know if i should get a diagnosis or not, I haven't mentioned anything about this to my parents or anyone. I heard that the cost of diagnosis is high, we barely make enough to live comfortably.

I don't feel comfortable discussing with my parents. I don't know how they will think of this. Only me know, no one else knows.

Little summary (It is a pain for me to read long posts with bunch of words :lol: )
Some autistic factors that I do have:
1. Repetitive movements/ words/phrases (only at home or places that I am comfortable with)
2. Can't make small talks
3. Trouble making friends
4. Sensitive to clothing tags
5. I love routines, but I can tolerate unexpected changes
6. Special interests

Some autistic factors that I don't have:
1. I can make eye contact (more comfortable with strangers)
2. Non verbal language/body language- I think i am comfortable with that
3. I don't take things literally

That's all I can think of currently, again, hello everyone!



SplendidSnail
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Joined: 2 Jul 2017
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 887
Location: Canada

17 Dec 2017, 11:11 pm

From what you describe, it seems plausible.

Regarding the non-verbal language, I think it's often difficult to know what this means. Those on the spectrum are often almost as good at recognising people's emotions as neurotypicals (this is called Affective empathy). What we generally aren't all that good at is seeing things from other people's perspective, which, in my case, tends to result in me arguing a lot even though I hate arguing.

Regarding taking things literally, I think a lot of us tend to think we don't take things literally - how do we know we're taking things literally unless it's pointed out to us? One thing that I've noticed about myself is that sometimes, even though I know that someone's not being serious, I tend to respond as if they were serious, but yet people don't seem to usually point that out to me, so I do wonder whether there are also times where I took things literally that weren't intend to be taken literally, but nobody pointed it out to me.

The one thing that does jump out at me as making it less likely for you to be on the spectrum is that you say eye contact is easy - people on the spectrum do generally find it hard to make eye contact. I'm no psychologist, though, so I'm not sure whether this is completely mandatory. I do also wonder whether you are as good at eye contact as you think. I thought for years that people did eye contact the same way as I do - either a brief glances at the eyes then looking away, or looking near, but not directly at, people's eyes. Looking at people now, though, I see people staring directly into each other's eyes when having an intense conversation - there is no way I could do that!

Have you tried the AQ (Autism Quotient) test? It's a nice tool to check whether you have traits comm among those on the spectrum, but be aware it's not a diagnosis - it's possible to have these traits but not be on the spectrum, and it's also possible to not have these traits but still be on the spectrum. You can find the test here:
https://psychology-tools.com/autism-spectrum-quotient/

As for what you should do, are there any resources at your college that could help you? If you were still in high school, I'd suggest that you talk to a school councillor, but being that you're not, I'm not sure whether there's any help available through your college.

If there isn't any help through the college, would it be financially feasible to have one appointment with a psychologist to discuss your concerns? You're not going to be getting a diagnosis in one session, but you might still be able to get some advice, and the psychologist may even be able to tell you whether it's likely or not.


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Level 1 Autism Spectrum Disorder / Asperger's Syndrome.