Struggling with Home life ,but succeeding in Business

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TooAutistic2BCool
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26 Dec 2017, 9:33 pm

So... I have a hard time staying on task with the simplest things like washing, staying organized, cleaning, eating... even planning hasnt helped that much as I always neglect to follow through on them.

Yet, I somehow function at work, multitask a variety of things, keep things organized, and have a wonderful collection of minions under me. Does anyone else feel like this? and if so, why do you think that is?



kraftiekortie
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26 Dec 2017, 9:48 pm

I'm the same way.

I'm much better out of the house than in the house.

But then....it seems like the male "species" tends towards this state of affairs, to the everlasting irritation of the female "species."

Sort of understandable, since ladies work outside the home, too.



ASPartOfMe
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27 Dec 2017, 11:55 am

I think it has something to do with using up so much mental energy "pretending to be normal" at work while dealing with normal work issues like deadlines that there is little or nothing left when you get home. Also at home is a comfort zone sending signals to your brain "relax".


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Mirka
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06 Jan 2018, 5:11 pm

I have the same thing.
I think that it may have something to do with the size of potential damage (or let some other person in bad possition). That fact is keeping me better in line.
In business the potential damage is too big (and not always just mine, more people would get influenced by my ignorance) and therefore I simply care much more.
I know that the best way to do stuff is systematic aproach. Why I can not be like this in private even if I want to?
I think that the problem is that I do not like myself too much and therefore I do not care very well.
Now I try to change the view how I look at myself. When I will care enough about myself, I am pretty sure that it will also affect the way I am doing my own stuff.



blazingstar
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08 Jan 2018, 7:46 pm

ASPartOfMe wrote:
I think it has something to do with using up so much mental energy "pretending to be normal" at work while dealing with normal work issues like deadlines that there is little or nothing left when you get home. Also at home is a comfort zone sending signals to your brain "relax".


I think that is also the case for me. I come home exhausted.


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TooAutistic2BCool
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11 Jan 2018, 6:30 pm

Thanks everyone, i appreciate the responses.



magz
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12 Jan 2018, 10:23 am

My spouse has a saying:
Everyone has their area of order.

He can't stop leaving dirty socks everywhere but can't tolerate dirty dishes in a sink. His area of order includes his computer and the kitchen.
I asked him where he sees my area of order. He answered: your mind.
Yeah, I don't much mind messy surroundings but I just can't live with knowledge I can't put in order. That's why after years of being a theological geek I left religion.

So I guess your area of order is your job.


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hale_bopp
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13 Jan 2018, 9:34 pm

TooAutistic2BCool wrote:
So... I have a hard time staying on task with the simplest things like washing, staying organized, cleaning, eating... even planning hasnt helped that much as I always neglect to follow through on them.

Yet, I somehow function at work, multitask a variety of things, keep things organized, and have a wonderful collection of minions under me. Does anyone else feel like this? and if so, why do you think that is?


I have similar functionality. I think it’s because we know our livelihood depends on work, and losing that would be extremely distressing and push a lot of us into a breakdown. I’m mostly highly functional at work, I work very quickly. I still have meltdowns, but most of that is bpd, not aspergers. I have limited discipline at home. At home, it doesn’t make a lot of difference. At work, keeping the job is the most important thing in my life. Losing it would mean chaos.



creativesoul
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14 Jan 2018, 11:49 pm

I can relate although I haven't had a job in many years. Part of it could be you don't want to be seen as a slacker in public. At home, nobody is holding you accountable. You might also have energy or attention deficit issues.



rowan_nichol
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03 Feb 2018, 9:38 am

Brings me to one of the first traits I noticed in me when watching "My Experience of Autism" - Doing one thing at a time and not a multi tasker. Yes, I can devote 11 or 12 hours of the day on my day job (which is in one of my passionate interests) after which on work days I have enough interest for the bare minumum, and on my days off it was anoither special interest which took my time



MrsPeel
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03 Feb 2018, 8:32 pm

This is a big problem for me, too.
I need to work, to support my family, and I'm reasonably successful at it, within my niche area - people are impressed by how fast I can get things done independently without major mistakes - but I feel like it takes every ounce of my energy.

At evenings and weekends I feel disgusted at the state of my house but just don't have the energy to tackle it, all I want to do is get away from people and read, or sleep, or go on WP hoping to find some understanding/sympathy...

Last night my Mum Skyped me and I had nothing to say to her, I was too hot (33 degrees and humid here lately) and too tired, even after a Saturday of doing nothing much, and now I feel really bad about that. But this is the way I am, I've learnt to recognise when I'm close to the edge, so I know if I stretch the limits further I'll only have a meltdown, which will be bad for the whole family, and it doesn't seem to be under my control.

Gets me down a bit, sometimes :(