Can't recognize faces, what do I do when police talk to me?
At work, we often have to call the police over suspicious individuals, etc. This has happened twice in the last 4 months on my shift. Nobody at work knows about my disability and I don't want them to know. I try to remember what people wear and tell the cops that, but last time they wanted me to come with them to verify an identity, which I AM NOT confident at all in doing. I managed to get one of my coworkers to go instead without calling attention to by disability. But I have come to realize that this may become a problem in the future.
Any advice or suggestions? Should I just tell the police that "I don't remember what they look like," if they are pushy, what excuse should I add?
I would be willing to tell the police about my disability if coworkers are not in earshot, but the problem is that there is usually a coworker within earshot when this happens (unless of course I whisper, but then I'm not sure if the average police-person has the commonsense to.. idk, take the hint that they are not supposed to repeat what I say out loud or something. ). I can in theory ask to talk to the police privately but the situation might not always make that practical.
"I'm terrible with faces, and I don't want to run the risk of identifying someone wrongly. I'd be happy to write out a description of what I can remember about their clothing and appearance for you, but I'm just not able to recognize someone I saw so briefly and I'd feel terrible if I caused trouble for someone innocent because I'm so bad with faces."
This is clear, polite, and lets officers know that if the case comes to a trial, their "eyewitness" is perfectly willing to go on record as unreliable. When they know up-front that, if you're ever put on the stand to testify the first thing you're going to say is, "I can't remember what he looked like, I'm so bad with faces," they'll work really hard to make sure that doesn't happen.
If you're concerned about being able to articulate that during a stressful time (this often happens to me), rewrite it so the words feel right coming out of your mouth and practice saying it in a tone that sounds friendly and regretful. Tons of people are really bad with faces.
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kokopelli
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Ichinin
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Print this out and show it whenever the subject comes up:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prosopagnosia
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Sweetleaf
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Just tell them you don't remember...if you can remember any specifics like maybe hair color or a specific clothing item then tell them that, but if you really can't recall anythings specific just be honest about it. You don't even have to bring up your disability...I doubt every neurotypical person is able to remember details.
If they are pushy you don't need an excuse, just reiterate that you really can't recall...I know it can be intimidating when they act pushy but you just have to stand your ground, they can't arrest you for not remembering what a suspicious person looked like.
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I have been confirmed as having prosopagnosia and when I deal with police at my work I have always been up front with them about my lack of ability to remember a face. If there are identifying marks I can tell them and like the OP said, I can describe clothing. If I know it will be necessary to describe a person I take notes as soon as I can, that way I can give at least a vague idea of what they looked like.
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Some good replies here. I believe that even amongst NTs without face blindness, their chances of getting descriptions right are quite varied. You obviously want to help the police catch the bad guys... I actually think it would be more helpful if you explained your problem so they don't waste time looking for the wrong person. And I'd ask to speak to them in private.
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For such desert to do me wreak and shame
Any advice or suggestions? Should I just tell the police that "I don't remember what they look like," if they are pushy, what excuse should I add?
I would be willing to tell the police about my disability if coworkers are not in earshot, but the problem is that there is usually a coworker within earshot when this happens (unless of course I whisper, but then I'm not sure if the average police-person has the commonsense to.. idk, take the hint that they are not supposed to repeat what I say out loud or something. ). I can in theory ask to talk to the police privately but the situation might not always make that practical.
dont sweat the cops, they make a living trying to scare people. They are the same as criminals, tough guy with a gun and a little bit of power. They are idiots all you have to do is give them your name and ID if you have it on you.
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