Making friends
I find it very challenging to make friends for so many reasons. Most people are hard to relate to because their lives are different from mine. Most people are shallow. I don't get the social games and the endless competitiveness. What do you guys find challenging about making friends?
Number 1 issue for me, finding people who are respectful (and trustworthy). Too many times have I encountered people who do not respect me for who I am and pretend that they do when they don't.
I also agree with you on the relate thing. It's hard for me to really relate to anyone enough to consider forming friendships.
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[Inactive - I have left WP permanently]
I find it hard to relate to people as well because people lives are different from mine. I also give off weird body language or something that puts people off because whether I am social with a person or reserved people just stay away from me.
I find keeping conversations going very hard and finding places(that don't make me anxious) to actually interact with others. I guess I just don't understand how to communicate with people correctly.
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Autism is a disorder not a personality trait!
"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
and Wisdom to know the difference."
I also agree with you on the relate thing. It's hard for me to really relate to anyone enough to consider forming friendships.
I can't stand it when people are fake. I don't like to waste time on people who are pretending to like me.
I find it hard to relate to people as well because people lives are different from mine. I also give off weird body language or something that puts people off because whether I am social with a person or reserved people just stay away from me.
I find keeping conversations going very hard and finding places(that don't make me anxious) to actually interact with others. I guess I just don't understand how to communicate with people correctly.
I find it hard to maintain conversations with people I don't have much in common with. I don't like making small talk either.
My biggest frustration right now. There is so much I want to do in life, but not by myself and I want to share myself with people and learn from others. The game playing is the one thing I do not get. People do it all the time, I see it, I have been accused of it myself but even if I wanted to play games, which I don't and never will, I would not know where to start. My life has not been, shall we say normal so yes, relating to people is hard for me.
I wish people could just get along with each other and accept one another. I don't do the social games and I never will. I don't like the drama created by social games.
There is a woman at my congregation who I do not get along with because she seems to be sweet as pie to other people while she is mean to me.
1. I asked her where she works because I was trying to be nice and she said that she worked at a health food store and I said I was interested when I asked her for the name. "It's XYZ store but you won't be buying because their products are very expensive."
Basically, she seemed to get jealous when any of her friends express any interest in joining me for lunch there or even talk to me.
Examples.
1.This past weekend, all her friends came to sit at the same table that I sat at while seemed to refuse to sit down and just stood up while eating
2.This other lady and I seem to get along and a few weeks ago while we were talking, this same lady pulled her away from me
This woman plays games by seeming to want all the attention because she's the "Popular girl." I one time heard her talking about how someone was trying to "Take that away from her" by "Destroying her reputation.
She finds every effort to find me in awkward situations so she can laugh at me and it's really annoying.
1. I asked her where she works because I was trying to be nice and she said that she worked at a health food store and I said I was interested when I asked her for the name. "It's XYZ store but you won't be buying because their products are very expensive."
Basically, she seemed to get jealous when any of her friends express any interest in joining me for lunch there or even talk to me.
Examples.
1.This past weekend, all her friends came to sit at the same table that I sat at while seemed to refuse to sit down and just stood up while eating
2.This other lady and I seem to get along and a few weeks ago while we were talking, this same lady pulled her away from me
This woman plays games by seeming to want all the attention because she's the "Popular girl." I one time heard her talking about how someone was trying to "Take that away from her" by "Destroying her reputation.
She finds every effort to find me in awkward situations so she can laugh at me and it's really annoying.
There are women like that at my church too. I don't waste my time with any of them because of behavior like what you described.
I find it hard to keep conversations going because I'm used to talking only about animes, movies, games and TV series and I don't meet people who talk about these things anymore. I didn't use to have a problem with that, people would start a conversation with me about something they've watched recently and then we would just keep talking for a really long time. Now, I only meet people who talk about their lives, about the weather, etc. And I don't know what I should answer to these things.
I can't relate to most people's lives. I have been through things that most people have never been through. I still have yet to do many things that most people do by the time they are my age.
I find that there are people who just talk for the sake of talking, I think it comforts their inner anxiety.
Much love ...... Bob
Some people love to hear themselves talk. I think silence scares most people like light scares vampires.
1. I asked her where she works because I was trying to be nice and she said that she worked at a health food store and I said I was interested when I asked her for the name. "It's XYZ store but you won't be buying because their products are very expensive."
Basically, she seemed to get jealous when any of her friends express any interest in joining me for lunch there or even talk to me.
Examples.
1.This past weekend, all her friends came to sit at the same table that I sat at while seemed to refuse to sit down and just stood up while eating
2.This other lady and I seem to get along and a few weeks ago while we were talking, this same lady pulled her away from me
This woman plays games by seeming to want all the attention because she's the "Popular girl." I one time heard her talking about how someone was trying to "Take that away from her" by "Destroying her reputation.
She finds every effort to find me in awkward situations so she can laugh at me and it's really annoying.
There are women like that at my church too. I don't waste my time with any of them because of behavior like what you described.
That's what keeps me from going to church. I don't want to lose hope in them and in the religion.
For me the biggest problem is to keep conversation going. Similar to many other comments, I can't relate to people and neither can they. So it just goes as if we're doing a survey or something. Another problem is that I giggle unnecessarily when the anxiety kicks in.
Many of them call himself or herself, "most people", as if he or she outnumbered me, so he or she overpowered me. It is correct that, in many ways, he or she was more normal than me. But there is only one of him or her and only one of me
Sometimes, he or she is totally theatrical
It's hard for me to reach a balance between not caring, and going overboard
When they say or do something I don't like, I do not say anything because I am afraid that, if I said something, they would not want to be my precious lil "friend" anymore. But they keep micromanaging me.
If he or she dumps me, I go from one to zero "friends". If I dump him or her, he or she goes from 100 to 99 friends. It is like he has the monopoly competition
Many times I do not feel like making actions or statements. Bored, tired, lazy. While she will not close her trap
Peer pressure
Off leash dogs
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