Am I too damaged to be fixed?

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auntblabby
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20 Feb 2018, 4:25 am

katdances wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
I didn't get my one and only "GF experience" until I was in my 50s :bigsmurf: which was too late. it did give me a taste of what I had lacked up until then. but I absolutely cannot handle another breakup. mebbe in the next life i'll manage to do better. I reckon most of y'all will do better.


That's what scares me a bit to be honest. I haven't been in a relationship and I'm thirty. More and more I'm starting to think that if it ever happens, if/when it ends, it would be too hard for me to deal that I would seclude even more. I'm not a person that someone gets to know easily. I've also thought seriously that maybe I'm not supposed to have someone, which saddens me.

but I also should mention I have a few good memories I can look back on and offer myself some comfort in trying times. I know my human limitations, I am the way god made me, it had to be for a definite reason that i'm the way I am. I know I try hard to practice the golden rule and be good to people who want me to be good to them. this keeps me from being sad.



Marknis
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20 Feb 2018, 10:07 pm

An ex-friend claimed I couldn't see the tools that I had to fix myself. She never specified but I suppose it doesn't matter anymore.



kraftiekortie
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20 Feb 2018, 10:11 pm

Will you stop listening to these people!



Marknis
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25 Feb 2018, 11:16 pm

I lost my therapy last week and I feel horrible but I have no one to turn to. :( This is how it always ends up for me.



auntblabby
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25 Feb 2018, 11:24 pm

I am curious as to how or why the therapy stopped. mental health care sure is expensive, I have found that as I aged out of DVR/DSHS care, I had to learn how to be my own therapist, as it is basically unaffordable unless one has $$$$$ or lives in a nation with relatively generous social services.



katdances
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05 Mar 2018, 10:05 pm

auntblabby wrote:
katdances wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
I didn't get my one and only "GF experience" until I was in my 50s :bigsmurf: which was too late. it did give me a taste of what I had lacked up until then. but I absolutely cannot handle another breakup. mebbe in the next life i'll manage to do better. I reckon most of y'all will do better.


That's what scares me a bit to be honest. I haven't been in a relationship and I'm thirty. More and more I'm starting to think that if it ever happens, if/when it ends, it would be too hard for me to deal that I would seclude even more. I'm not a person that someone gets to know easily. I've also thought seriously that maybe I'm not supposed to have someone, which saddens me.

but I also should mention I have a few good memories I can look back on and offer myself some comfort in trying times. I know my human limitations, I am the way god made me, it had to be for a definite reason that i'm the way I am. I know I try hard to practice the golden rule and be good to people who want me to be good to them. this keeps me from being sad.


sometimes I just want more you know? It's a bit baffling seeing people just coupling up like it's no big deal. It's discouraging.



auntblabby
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05 Mar 2018, 10:15 pm

katdances wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
katdances wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
I didn't get my one and only "GF experience" until I was in my 50s :bigsmurf: which was too late. it did give me a taste of what I had lacked up until then. but I absolutely cannot handle another breakup. mebbe in the next life i'll manage to do better. I reckon most of y'all will do better.


That's what scares me a bit to be honest. I haven't been in a relationship and I'm thirty. More and more I'm starting to think that if it ever happens, if/when it ends, it would be too hard for me to deal that I would seclude even more. I'm not a person that someone gets to know easily. I've also thought seriously that maybe I'm not supposed to have someone, which saddens me.

but I also should mention I have a few good memories I can look back on and offer myself some comfort in trying times. I know my human limitations, I am the way god made me, it had to be for a definite reason that i'm the way I am. I know I try hard to practice the golden rule and be good to people who want me to be good to them. this keeps me from being sad.


sometimes I just want more you know? It's a bit baffling seeing people just coupling up like it's no big deal. It's discouraging.

that is why we can't compare ourselves to anybody else. the comparisons will generally reflect relatively poorly on us. so it does no good to entertain such thoughts. it is like expecting a fish to ride a bicycle, we have to concentrate on what capacities we do have.



kraftiekortie
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05 Mar 2018, 10:24 pm

Or a fish to climb a tree, per Einstein.....



auntblabby
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05 Mar 2018, 10:28 pm

I liked steinam's example better :)