Am I too damaged to be fixed?

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I feel like I am too "damaged" as a person to ever get better. I want a better life but all I get are walls at everything I do. I keep getting the message that I can't move forward and I should just disappear. I am no longer "new"; I didn't achieve certain expectations in my developmental years so I feel like an outdated product that should be thrown away.

Nope. You can definitely get fixed. You're not as "broken" as you think you are.

But if there is a repair process, how long will it take? Weeks? Months? Years? Decades? The thought is very daunting.

Have you ever thought about being a disc jockey? Do you ever put together playlists of songs you like? You could work in a station, or work out of a home studio, playing parties.

It could take a very short time, or a very long time.

If you really actively help yourself, the time taken to "repair" yourself will probably be much shorter.

I would try to laugh at the "Bible-belters," rather than be pissed at them. That's what I used to do with my bullies: laugh at them, laugh at their follies.

Marknis

Based on your previous posts, it appears that, there might be methods to "fix" the damage. However, those methods are not always obvious, fast, or easy. Or complete. You can't change the past. Some of the damage is permanent, but it seems hard to fancy that all of the damage is permanent

Furthermore the future could damage you more.

The way i look at it is like, it is easy for someone to shoot me with a gun. It just takes a couple seconds and calories, and a gun, and the intention.

But the damage takes a lot of energy to fix. It has to be a stampede of medical doctors. For a long time. It costs $$. It is risky. With intention and outcome.

And even then, it is not as good as it was before. And it was never that great to begin with

Have you thought of moving to the country?

living out in the sticks as a hermit for a decade now, my damage has become a feature. I am in my element here and that which were defects in society are no longer so, now. some people are just not compatible with other people no matter what adjustments are attempted, it is outside of the practical adjustment range to deal with some people, and for some of us, to deal with the lions' share of people.

I happen to believe that AuntBlabby still has many of the virtues necessary to be a good person.

And he's pretty smart, too.

I'm sure, if I met him, he wouldn't be some crusty "mountain man."

He'd be more a man of refinement---more like that Doc in "Back to the Future" than Grizzly Adams.

Doc has his eccentricities---but he still treats people decently.

And Marknis seems like a cool guy, too.

I believe in change in OUTLOOK would work wonders.

And maybe....get in contact with some anime-type people on this Forum, and other Forums.

I know very little about anime.

I used to watch "Speed Racer", which was anime, back in the 1960s-1970s---but I didn't know it was anime at the time (and not many others knew it, either).

I can relate to you. I don't believe I can be fixed either. I am stuck in my old habits and way of thinking. I've been to counseling and have taken antidepressants but they don't do that much for me. Therapy and medication does not change the situations you are in. It is suppose to change your thinking on how to cope with that situation. I just cannot change my way of thinking even if I tried. Changing your thinking does not bring back what has been lost or damage that has been done. Some people just cannot be fixed.