Starting to resent my job

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I work 5-9. It used to not be a problem but now it's becoming a problem, why? School events happen after school and I miss out on them, school programs go on and I have to miss those too and rely on my parents to take them and in the past my son has missed out because my husband would fail to tell them and my parents wouldn't be home and I would be at work.

Now my son has wanted to do martial arts but all of the classes happen on weekdays after school and I am at work by then. My son might want to do sports too but can't because I work evenings.

My husband doesn't drive and my parents are retired and have their own lives and I shouldn't have to rely on them and be a burden just so my son can do after school things.

I am starting to hate my hours and I have another year to go before I ask my boss if I can move to day time hours while my kids are in school so they wouldn't have to miss out on stuff after school and the fact my husband is unable to drive. Uber isn't always reliable and buses here don't come on time or run on our schedule or take us where they would need to go and it takes like two hours to get somewhere by bus when you go across town.

Plus I can't rely on my husband because he often forgets and he has been sick so he has been sleeping a lot and my in laws have been sick so they are also sleeping and my son forgets to do his homework and no adult is there to remind him or to make him do it because I am at work. Then I get home and they are already sleeping. I am so worried about his education and my husband thinks I am over reacting. I hate my work hours.

Nobody takes into consideration not everyone has 9-5 jobs. I had to have my brother take my daughter to her school Christmas program (he has a daytime job) back in December because my parents couldn't make it home in time from their 3 month trip because something in their RV broke and they ordered the wrong part and they were stuck in a golf cart town in Arizona.

I guess, if there’s a morning opening, you should apply for it.

Your concerns are legitimate.

My daughter has preschool at 8:20 and gets out at 11:20 three days a week and next year she will go five days a week from 9 to 12. Who is going to take her and pick her up? That is why I have to wait another year before she is in school full day so I will be more free. I don't think I can afford childcare everyday after school, it's $12 an hour. $3 if it's until six and that is at the school I had enrolled her in for next year because her current one is getting rid of three days for next year and their five day week for half day is too expensive for us to afford.

I see what you mean.

Just my two cents to think different. You might want to consider enrolling your son on karate and dealing with unreliable Uber service. If your son missed karate 10 percent of the time, not a big deal. Maybe you could make arrangements with other parents to get him from Karate back to your house. Just a thought.

True true everything happens after 5 pm here too. All the meetups are at 9 pm

I have a friend who's in a similar situation. She says at her daughter's school all of the mums are housewives who don't work. She works full time so it's very difficult for her. The school doesn't make it easy for her because they just assume that every child has one non-working parent.

I wonder if she has talked to them about it? Does she have a husband who can take her kid to the events?

I wonder if it's the kind of neighborhood her kid's school is in? If it's in the wealthy part of town where families make a good income and it allows the moms to stay at home while the dads work, that is why. I think if a school is in the poor part of town, there might be less school events after school because of working parents and less parent involvement with the school and the principal and teachers wouldn't be expecting parents to come so they wouldn't be making all these after school events or making parents to come volunteer. But schools in poor part of towns tend to have lower school ratings because of these things. Schools being around houses or a bunch of apartments is a hint what kind of school it might be. I live where it's mixed to the school by us has a rating of 1 so my son goes to another school in a different school zone because it has a better rating so I have to transport him. It was for his educational needs and the fact he was lacking in language.

Luckily my son's school offers daytime and evening times for parent teacher conference to cater those who work 9-5 and those who work evenings and they do after school care too to cater to parents who work past when school gets out but I think it costs money.

No she doesn't. She's a single mother.It's a private school for rich kids. She's not rich by any means but she spends $8,000 per yeat to send her daughter there because the public schools have a bullying problem (which the public school teachers do nothing about).

They make her take days off work because they hold parent teacher conferences in the middle od the day (non-negotiable).


This is no problem for most of the families there because most of the kids there have rich dad's so there's no need for their mums to work. She resents having to pay hundreds of dollars for school uniforms when her daughter will quickly outgrow them.

In Australia the uniform situation has gotten nearly as bad in public schools. Nowadays they all require overpriced uniforms, without exception. When I was a lad uniforms were mostly just for private schools, not for public schools.

Perhaps the public school teachers thought letting the kids wear non identical clothes would lead to too much independent thought. Or perhaps the public school teachers (who do little to inspire aspiration in their students (in my experience)) thought their students should get used to wearing a uniform because they fully expect their students to have a career wearing a McDonald's or Kmart uniform.

We like to pretend Australia is an egalitarian, classless society, but it's not classless at all.

What happens to parents who can't afford a uniform and don't have a credit card and don't have anyone who will buy the uniforms for their kids?

I am glad my son's school has no bullying problem. It's a diverse school is why and they have up signs about welcoming trans, gays, all colors, etc. One of the reasons why I send him there and only thing I pay for is gas.

My daughter is going to a new school next year because I cannot afford $425 with my son in his school due to cost of gas. Luckily we don't have to buy a uniform from the uniform shop, you can go to any store to by a regular outfit but ut has to look like the uniforms and be free of logos. White shirt, taki pants however you spell it, plaid green skirt skirt, dark blue blouse or sweat shirt or t shirt, dark blue dress with red trim on it. I got my daughter's school uniforms from a second hand store and found a pair of pants at the school where parents donate uniforms for other parents their kids outgrow or when they go to 9th grade.