Self improvement to attract others

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Are these people real or hypothetical?

If you can work part-time in retail, you can work full-time in an office.

In general, yes, being able to walk would open up a lot of dating doors to someone in a wheelchair.

There are some disabled people who cannot improve their situation, but there are many more who simply believe they cannot. I'm very fortunate to personally know other disabled people (besides myself) who have done amazing jobs of improving themselves and their lot in life.

Alisa has muscular dystrophy and has been in a wheelchair her whole life pretty much. She wasn't supposed to live passed being a teenager. She's endured many surgeries and difficulties while remaining upbeat. She's personally raised hundreds of thousands of dollars for MD research. She may have had some self doubt when she asked on FB a couple years ago if we thought she could be a teacher.. and I told her if Stephen Hawking could teach the whole world, she could teach a classroom no problem. She's going to University now to study to become a teacher & just a day or two ago turned 22 years old.

Mark is deaf. ~18 years ago when we graduated high school together he thought he'd be doomed to stocking grocery store shelves at night or something. I encouraged him to get an education and do w/e he wants. He's a programmer for the federal government, but also had a couple small businesses online - one of which he's worked diligently on for about 12 years now. He took a couple years off from his day job to expand his business by buying a building & setting it up as an R&D shop that employs ~12 people full time, mostly electronic & software engineers, developing more and more products for his global network of distributors to sell. He has way deeper pockets than me, and in a few short years once all the R&D money he's been pouring into product development turns into saleable products, he'll very quickly become a multimillionaire.

Gayle has struggled with obesity & depression for her entire adult life (she must be close to 60yo now) but a handful of years ago she got a real kick right in the health points when she contracted some virus that ended up infecting her spine & causing partial paralysis. She spent most of a couple years' time getting dozens of rounds of intravenous meds & doing rehab exercises in a famous rehab centre in Vancouver (GF Strong). Doctors told her she would probably never walk again. She didn't much care for that prognosis. When she's healthy, she walks around now, with a walker - and some short distances without. She's currently waiting to have some IV port surgery done to rectify something so she can continue with another 60 rounds of IV drugs for whatever's infecting her now.. but still, she maintains a relatively positive & upbeat persona on Facebook instead of dwelling on any negatives whatsoever, no matter how difficult or frustrating her path is. She'll get better again and be back to walking about, even if it has to be assisted by a walker or cane.

Maybe you're 100% correct that you can't work full time right now, sly, but that doesn't have to ring true forever. Personal improvement, bit by bit, is 100% possible for every single human being on this planet - yourself included. All you really need to succeed in this life is a fighting chance & the will to fight. Combine those two and you can do anything you set your mind to. It may take a long time to get to that point, but so what? If you Want to be able to work full time for whatever reason, whether to make more money for self serving quality of life reasons, or to be more attractive to others, then you Can do it. You just have to set your eyes on that prize and work towards it no matter how long it takes. Just like someone who's gained too much weight, it takes a long time to get out of shape.. and should be expected to take a long time to get back into shape. Same same for mental health, sly. It's taken a long time for you to get to the point of believing your depressive thoughts that you cannot do things, and it'll take a long time to overcome those thoughts as well as get your body & mind balanced again to the point that you can do more in this life. You've just got to put in the work to do the self improvement things required along the way to get there. And we will be here to encourage you to just keep moving forward, too.

Calling yourself a failure sounds like the start of a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Improvement is only required of men these days. A woman can be a jobless fat slob and men are supposed to accept her as is or they are misogynist pigs. Also, with women nabbing more and more jobs these days cause of gender policies, it's getting harder and harder to impress them as a man is always supposed to earn more.

Anyone with a little brain capacity realizes MGTOW is the only way to go any more.

I’m 30 my life is over. Onl tny few people started their lives few at 40and became sand they were super outgoing high confident nts. They also had high intelligence.ive put in tons of work, probably more then you, all of it did nothing, not a single god dam thing. Some people are just failures no matter what they do.

Ignoring reality gets you institutionalized. World isn’t a kind place with rainbows. For someone to succeed many others must fail

Ignoring reality gets you institutionalized. World isn’t a kind place with rainbows. For someone to succeed many others must fail

That's not ignoring reality. That's a universal truth. Negative affirmations can be just as damaging to one's abilities & performance as positive ones can be beneficial. Negative self talk destroys self worth & confidence and makes one believe the things they tell themselves. It's an incredibly self destructive unhealthy habit that serves no good purpose whatsoever in one's life and is a practice that should be avoided.

It's ignorant and untrue if you take it too literally which some people might do. The paralyzed person really won't get up just because he thinks he can walk and even if I thought I could fly I wouldn't survive jumping off the Eiffel tower. What is meant by it is true in a lot of cases though.

I haven't read those books yet goldfish but I still wanted to at least share some of my thoughts on this subject. There is a lot of negativity on these boards which makes me sad since I came here for positive reinforcement and a supportive community. Thankfully I've managed to find several people that do think the same but for those of you that think life is over at 30 or can never get better, then I'd have to say you're wrong.

I broke my back when I was 18, never supposed to be able to walk again. I now walk 2 miles to work every day. I had crap jobs for years that would lead nowhere, busser, telemarketer, etc. I kept trying for better jobs and finally got into a healthcare position that now pays enough for me to pursue my dreams. I'm 36 and I'm getting a degree in IT and getting certification for a better position in the hospital. I see people working into their 70's and 80's if they like their job so I see no reason to hold back on schooling no matter my age since there is plenty of time left.

I have struggled with staying fit since I can't walk sometimes still due to my injuries. I do struggle finding relationships that are worthwhile. The key is always to keep trying, on occasion yes, I'll think it's hopeless but if I don't try then there is zero chance. If I do try, even if the chance is slim there is still that slim chance I'll succeed in what I'm trying to do. It took me 18 years to finally get back into school but perseverance and refusing to give up is what will make me successful.

edit: As for the forum.. it seems that there are a number of people who define "support forum," as "place to complain," and seek no actual support in the pursuit of improvement - only sympathy. I think it's nice to have more and more optimistic posters here maintaining a balance. Hopefully we can be a positive influence on others here.