messed up broken lonely heart not capable

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My mom says I cant ever live on my own. Just bc I tried to cook a pizza and the alarms went off, so I opened the door back and forth and turned the oven off. She told me to turn over the fish today and I did it in the oven and I was like, I'm sorry I did it wrong you should have taught me this when I was twelve, its not my fault

I have superstrength me and my mom went on a walk in the snow and had some laughs and I felt that she finally loves me. Then she asked me to lift the windshield wiper and I broke it accidentally. It was a freaking accident. And she is so angry and she said she isn't when I asked her, she said no but she is yelling and saying someone else might have pressed charges. I even looked it up and pep boys can fix it for free.

She thinks I can never live on my own, I want to be in NZ in a youth hostel like NOW, prove to the world that I can do it, that not all middle aged women hate themselves, some have Jesus. I am happy tomorrow I have church. She thinks I'll be lost starving and homeless. I am angry and scared and trying to hold onto hope.

She says I'm nothing. I feel like garbage. I'm not capable of the living things people do to live.

Oh Rebecca.

I bet you're capable in many ways.

I wish I could hug you now.

{{{{{{{HUG}}}}}}

Your mother shouldn't be saying these things to you. Sometimes, my wife says similar things, so I know how you feel.

I hope you can listen to some nice music, or watch a funny TV show to take your mind off this.

This post needs more replies.

Please don't think for a minute that the small number of replies means that we don't care - we do. It's more that we read the post and feel for you, but given that most of us have ASD, we don't know what to say to you, so we say nothing.


That sounds really, really hard. Being that I don't really have anyone I would call a friend outside of family, I can't imagine how hard it must be to have your mother say things like that to you. It does sound like you do have something to hold onto with your church, so that's something at least.

Try to hang on, I hope things get better.

Some parents just can't teach, but mothers sometimes just don't want to let their childrearing years end. There may also be troubles over people not recognizing that there are more than one way to get a job done. I learned mostly from books, and by trying things. My father might have expected me to come back begging after he threw me out, but I managed to pick up what I needed and stay on my own.

OP, don't feel bad, "a [person]'s gotta know his/her limitations." I burn water meself. I could use your "superstrength."

Thanks guys I will use positive affirmations. I can do it. I am strong. I can start a new life in NZ. I am capable.

If you want to get a Boy Scout cooking badge, to take the test, you have to cook bacon and eggs. To pass the test, you have to eat them. They are usually better the next time.

In teaching yourself, you will make mistakes. Schools are designed so they won't matter, but a bit of foresight is very helpful in the real world. Practice making things by re-working scrap that can still be thrown away. Ask your awkward questions in a support group. To practice driving on ice, never experiment without room to slide in without hitting anything. To test traction, stab the brakes or make quick swerves, to see if a slide happened and you recovered, or if you could steer that hard all through the corner.

P.S. Bacon and eggs are unsafe to eat, but they don't get much worse if carbonized.

Everybody in order to learn a skill usually gets it wrong a few times before they get it right.

People on the spectrum often have fine motor skill issues which makes it harder to do these daily tasks. There are workarounds and excersizes that can help.

Look into getting occupational therapy. Independent living skills are what they teach. Fine motor skill exercises are often given.

There are group homes and such which is in between fully independent living and full dependency. Be careful with those some of them are quite nasty.

In order to use the last two options a professional diagnosis is usually needed.