Youngest age to date with a girl?

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One thing that has always perplexed me is the extent to which the average male and female misunderstand each other. One would think evolution would favor mutual understanding, but apparently not.

Most girls and would would probably agree that this man is handsome.

For a grandpa.

It doesn't mean he turns them on and they want to date him. Agreeing that someone is good looking and being attracted to them romantically and/or sexually such that they are considered to be a potential mate or two different things.

You should also be aware of another phenomena that might come into play. Go to youtube and find a video of a woman with some type of deformity or disfiguring condition and then note in the comments section how many girls and women are telling her she's beautiful.

They don't find her beautiful in a physical sense. In fact, they might think she's extremely ugly. But they are telling her she's beautiful because they see an internal beauty in her or they feel bad for her and are trying to boost her self confidence because many women have a poor body image even when they look perfectly normal.

So now that we've dispelled the myth them men age better than woman in any sense, you are probably wondering what makes an older man attractive to a younger woman if it isn't that she can't tell how old he is.

A lot of times when very young girls and women go for older men it's because they want a man who has more stability and emotional maturity in their life than someone their age.

That's one of the characteristics that I'm looking for in a girl.

We’ve hardly dispelled anything because it’s hardly a myth. The false assumption has been made that I was strictly speaking in sexual terms.

The “handsome for a grandpa,” yeah, I predict that more younger women would agree that he’s attractive. George Clooney might be another example. Charlie Sheen BEFORE the HIV revelation. Tom Cruise. NOT octogenarians, obviously, but age hasn’t exactly set them back. Sean Connery has been said to still have strong sexual appeal for some, and I’ve met women who would “totally do” Connery. Or even Patrick Stewart. Or Bruce Willis.

Now, ask young men about, say, Donatella Versace. Or Dolly Parton. Betty White. Cher. Carrie Fischer (GRHS) BEFORE taking on the new Star Wars film...heck, who am I kidding? Even IN the new films—and you can label me a blasphemer if you want, but young guys aren’t gonna look at her the same way we did in the Jabba scenes. Even Carrie was well aware of the change and accepted it. Or—let’s take this one more step—how about Kelly Clarkson? She’s only 35 with nothing to rely on but her pure talent. Nothing to be ashamed of, but excellent example of what I mean. Nature slapped her down early.

There are a few women who can pull off that whole “seasoned” look i’m talking about with men. I would totally do Diane Keaton. Meg Ryan, although she’s borderline IMO and could make a huge improvement by growing her hair out just a little. Katherine Kelly Lang, who I’m a HUGE fan of. But these are largely exceptional and we’re talking freakin’ celebrities with all the makeup. It doesn’t get any better as you move outwards from Hollywood.

It’s not an indictment on a person’s value. I’m just being honest. Women have a tougher time at this than men the same age. It happens and it’s not a big deal. I don’t believe any man can honestly say the same thing for older women as younger women say for men of the same or close age range.

The older celebrity women who you view as having sex appeal are the exception but the older celebrity men who you view as having sex appeal are not? Perhaps from your position as a heterosexual male but as a heterosexual male you are not more qualified as to the perspectives of a heterosexual female than a heterosexual female.

Like it or not, the vast majority of 18-21 year olds are likely going to feel uneasy being propositioned by men in their 30s, and creeped out by being propositioned by men over 40.



You just listed a number of older women who you claim to find attractive...you just said you would "totally do" Diane Keaton.

And would these same women say the same to men with deformity? I think not.

Ummmmm...ok? I’m not talking about purely sexual attractiveness. I’m talking about beauty in general. You’re making the assumption that I’m talking about older people that someone would want to date or have sex with. I never said anyone was “propositioning” anyone.

This is really quite simple. Are young women more likely to say a man at a certain age is handsome than young men to say a woman of comparable age is beautiful?

Also, I do not appreciate your cis male shaming tactics here. That borders on bullying and I thought you were better than that. I have personally known quite a few women who at young ages described older men in those terms and a FEW of those who even mentioned feeling a sexual attraction. I am curious as to just how well this applies to younger women as a whole. Not in terms of who they’d date necessarily or who they’d have sex with, but in what they find beautiful or handsome. I’m curious as to whether there might actually be objective evidence to that effect, whereas you only seem interested in being right (and you haven’t made any evidenced claims, either) and shaming me for being a cis-hetero male AS IF that makes my opinions somehow invalid. That is unfair. Please do not go there again.

Wow so you were 42 and she was 24? Impressive! I can only hope to have that much appeal when I'm 42.

AngelRho, Is this what you feel is shaming or bullying?

I just read this as a statement of fact, that one sex is not in a better position to view things than the other. That both views are valid. I find 'if in doubt, take it literally' works well on here when I think someones being offensive.

Yeah, she's smart and beautiful too. No idea what she was thinking.

If true, then why point out that I’m a heterosexual male AT ALL? Saying I’m “not more qualified” solely on the basis that I’m a cis hetero male is entirely unnecessary. Chronos, if I am to give her the benefit of the doubt, might not have intended any offense. But sadly, that is the world we live in. That statement was deeply offensive, and similar statements very often are PURPOSEFULLY offensive.

I do not claim or pretend to speak for all women. I speak for what I observe in real life. I’m an inquisitive person and find the subject fascinating. I do not believe I’m always right about everything. I don’t feel compelled to prove I’m right about anything.

But I WILL NOT stand idly by while someone uses shaming language on the basis of my gender or orientation. Disagree with me? Fine. We can keep civil counterpoint going all day if I have the time for it. Even if I think you’re wrong, I will still respect that you sincerely believe what you say. Bringing gender into this is going too far. It is inappropriate, and if Chronos is unaware that it is inappropriate, perhaps now is the time for her to become aware of that.

I would never condescend to tell a woman she couldn’t possibly understand men’s issues based purely on the fact she’s a woman. I’m offended by the implication that I can’t relate anything I’ve heard women say JUST BECAUSE I’m a man, hence I’m “not...qualified.” That IS shaming. Supposing I take it literally...hello??? Exactly what other conclusions am I supposed to draw from that “literal” statement???

These aren't psychologically healthy relationships. There's typically an imbalance of power where the male plays a "father" role, taking advantage of the younger woman's lack of life experience. A woman that young can become overly dependent on the older man instead of achieving her own independence.

If she lives in a western country there’s no risk on her; she can take half of his wealth upon divorce.

I dunno...I mean, if that’s what a woman feels she needs or wants in a life partner, I see nothing intrinsically wrong with that.

There are risks and benefits for any pairing you can imagine. Older/younger pairs at extremes don’t offend me. It’s the motivation behind it. If a man is only attracted to 18-21 year olds, what happens if a LTR develops and she ages out? Trade her out for a new model? That’s unfair to her because you refuse to see her as anything more than her age. But if you don’t value relationships and she understands FWB/NSA is as far as it goes, then you’ve got a winner. My personal preference is towards longer commitments, so I could never do that. But it might work out well for someone else.

Then you have the kink/fetish aspect of only dating (“barely legal”) teens. I would say that’s a problem because the same justification makes pedophilia ok. The difference is only that one will land you in prison while the other will not. It might not constitute an actual psychological problem, but then it might. It’s more a philosophical problem to work out—SHOULD one only date within a certain age range, and why? Depending on your goals for a relationship, you might have safer alternatives.

That not more means not more, she didn't say your view was worth less, she said it wasn't worth more. If you mean she was implying something else, I wouldn't know because I can't pick up that kind of thing .

So much love in the air.