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I don't know should I move on or wait for my aspie ex...

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Sweetleaf
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20 Feb 2018, 4:46 pm

datsloth wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
datsloth wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
What where the things he did that weren't right for someone in a relationship to do, that he wouldn't listen to you about? And what things were triggering you to complain?
like flirting with other girls, but as I said, that period of time had passed. Then he still kept talking to those who once sent nudes to him (although he had deleted those pics), kept selfies of them and plenty female friends on his computer(even though he said those were just for memeory) , stalked certain girls and spammed them virtural gifts, commented words like "hot" on some random girls' pic etc

Sweetleaf wrote:
Also its a problem if he wouldn't listen to you, even if you were wrong about some of what you said or did...people in relationships listen to each other and consider each others feelings, even when in disagreement. Sounds like he wasn't willing to do that.


He didn't understand what's wrong with most the things he did, nor did he understand my emotion. He thought I complained for the sake of complaining, got even more annoyed when I explained to him since it sounded too complicated to him. The more he felt like he was being ordered, the less he was willing to do anything.



Ok so after he promised to stop flirting with other girls he was still talking to girls he had sexual relations with and saving their pictures? and posting flirty comments on their pictures and posts? I mean even if he didn't initially know that was inappropriate...seems like he wasn't doing a good job of keeping his promise to quit that behavior with other women.

Also how do you mean stalking, like just online or like actually following them around IRL...regardless of anything else if he was stalking other women while still being in a relationship with you that is a pretty big red flag, stalking in general is a red flag.


he liked to draw attentions and seek banters from the reaction from others. By stalking I meant only the cyber stalking, he viewed certain girls' post and commented on most of them. He got nothing better to do besides that and video games or anime


Well sounds to me like you could do better...even if it is just cyber stalking, that is still creepy and its perfectly reasonable to tell him that's inappropriate and to stop, its unreasonable for him to expect you to just put up with it. But sounds like its just a cycle of him actually doing things he shouldn't, you confronting him, and him just turning it all around on you...telling you you're the one being irrational and paranoid.

Maybe you can't see it right now, but I think you'd be better off keeping your distance, he sounds rather mentally abusive honestly. Also he is already your ex at this point....trying to continue pursuing him or getting back with him will probably just be harmful for you, you'd be better off with someone who supports you and builds you up, not someone who ignores you and tears you down.


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datsloth
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28 Feb 2018, 11:02 pm

hale_bopp wrote:
I’d stay away. Sounds like a grade a a***hole. Why is a man in a relationship spending so much time engaging single women? It’s really not normal. From your posts, you seem to be making excuses for him. You don’t seem to owe him any apology, I would take back the power, walk away and cut him off. More trouble than it’s worth.



He says those women are his only friends, he finds it easier and less anxious to talk with them than with men