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IreneAdler
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15 Jul 2018, 1:46 pm

Hi I am new...

I was diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome/ASD in 2013, but I first knew I was 'different' when I was about 5. I went through diagnoses of depression, anxiety and bipolar disorder before I came to AS.

I currently live by myself (well, with my dog) and have a part time job. I see a counsellor. I have had one long term relationship, which started well, and ended badly.

I feel very intensely, and as a teenager/young adult I was completely unable to cope with these feelings, coupled with my inability to understand the social world, and began to self harm. I don't anymore, and find even the idea of cutting myself very squeamish and disturbing now.

At times I have been so overwhelmed by the world that I shut down for weeks or months, speaking very little and sleeping a lot.

I am in a reasonably good place at the moment. I like my job, though I sometimes find it stressful.

Due to having a job, although I am much happier. my home life has deteriorated as I am too exhausted to cook/clean/tidy when I get home. Although I don't know who I'm kidding, since even before I had a job I never used to do these things!

I like doing and reading about things I am interested in and ....... am disintersted in most other things!

My interests are: education, certain tv shows and book characters that I am concerned about disclosing in case they reveal my identity, animals, and I am learning to draw. I am trying to do more exercise, particularly swimming, but I find I am very lazy. I got into a routine of swimming 3 times a week, something happened to mess it up, and I have not been consistently since. I am very overweight and would like to be less overweight as being fat makes me feel greedy, lazy and gluttonous. But maybe I am fat because I AM these things, and it seems very difficult to stop being them.

Erm... well that's me, I can't imagine why anyone would read this or what they might respond to it. I obsess over what other people are thinking, and usually get it wrong because I assume they are thinking what I might be thinking in that situation, and I tend to be a LOT more sensitive than other people.

I think I am here because I would like a friend. I have only ever managed to have one friend at a time. My last friend was my boyfriend (who I sadly seem to have 'dumped' my previous best friend for; I didn't mean to, I think I just couldn't manage more than one close relationship).



grahambaster
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15 Jul 2018, 4:16 pm

Hello & Welcome.


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AnonymousAnonymous
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15 Jul 2018, 6:36 pm

Welcome to Wrong Planet! :)


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Campin_Cat
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15 Jul 2018, 9:46 pm

Hi, IreneAdler----and, Welcome to WP!!

So many of the things you list about yourself, make up alot of what alot of us here are made-up of, like: going-through multiple diagnoses, before "landing" on the correct one----or, the one that ties all the rest together, maybe.

Alot of us here have jobs and pets.

Feeling things very intensely, getting overwhelmed, unable to grasp all the things that make-up the social world, self-harm----and, even some of us are total slobs (LOL myself, included)----are all experienced by alot of us, here.

In case you haven't already found them.....

Television Shows: viewforum.php?f=10

Art (drawing): viewforum.php?f=4

Health and Fitness: viewforum.php?f=34

Social Skills and Making Friends: viewforum.php?f=7

I hope you find lots of what you're looking for, here----and, that you enjoy visiting here----and, again, WELCOME!!

Take care,

Cat





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isloth
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15 Jul 2018, 10:12 pm

Hi Irene, Welcome to Wrong Planet, hope you enjoy your stay!

IreneAdler wrote:
I obsess over what other people are thinking, and usually get it wrong because I assume they are thinking what I might be thinking in that situation, and I tend to be a LOT more sensitive than other people.
That sounds like you have trouble with Theory of Mind. Something a lot of us here have trouble with and discuss regularly! However, it's very kind of you to even try to make the effort to understand others, you can definitely learn. :)

IreneAdler wrote:
book characters that I am concerned about disclosing in case they reveal my identity
Too late, you already revealed one in your username (a good one too) ! :lol:


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IreneAdler
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16 Jul 2018, 2:42 pm

Thanks for the welcome :)



Campin_Cat wrote:
Hi, IreneAdler----and, Welcome to WP!!

So many of the things you list about yourself, make up alot of what alot of us here are made-up of, like: going-through multiple diagnoses, before "landing" on the correct one----or, the one that ties all the rest together, maybe.

Alot of us here have jobs and pets.

Feeling things very intensely, getting overwhelmed, unable to grasp all the things that make-up the social world, self-harm----and, even some of us are total slobs (LOL myself, included)----are all experienced by alot of us, here.

In case you haven't already found them.....

Television Shows:

Art (drawing):

Health and Fitness:

Social Skills and Making Friends:

I hope you find lots of what you're looking for, here----and, that you enjoy visiting here----and, again, WELCOME!!

Take care,

Cat


Thank you, that's really helpful. I haven't met a lot of people with Asperger's who seem to be the same.... 'type' as me. Possibly that's because everyone is different? I don't know. I have occasionally been to a group for people with Asperger's, but I've never found anyone I can relate to there really. Almost like I seem too competent socially, even though compared to NTs in social situations I am certainly not! (I had to delete the links as WP is concerned I may be a spammer)



IreneAdler
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16 Jul 2018, 2:45 pm

isloth wrote:
Hi Irene, Welcome to Wrong Planet, hope you enjoy your stay!
IreneAdler wrote:
I obsess over what other people are thinking, and usually get it wrong because I assume they are thinking what I might be thinking in that situation, and I tend to be a LOT more sensitive than other people.
That sounds like you have trouble with Theory of Mind. Something a lot of us here have trouble with and discuss regularly! However, it's very kind of you to even try to make the effort to understand others, you can definitely learn. :)

IreneAdler wrote:
book characters that I am concerned about disclosing in case they reveal my identity
Too late, you already revealed one in your username (a good one too) ! :lol:


Hello! Thank you for the reply. I certainly care very much what others are feeling, probably too much! I ought to give up since I mostly get it wrong, and overcompensate and overapologise, but it's not so easy.

Thanks :) the people I am worried about discovering me are unlikely to 'get' the reference.... and I'm most worried about an eclectic mix of characters 'outing' me. Though I am becoming more and more confident that it wouldn't matter anyway....



Esmerelda Weatherwax
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16 Jul 2018, 2:56 pm

Welcome - and as someone else has already commented, excellent username :-)


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LoneLoyalWolf
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16 Jul 2018, 4:46 pm

Welcome IreneAdler!

Finding it hard to do certain things is a common part of depression. An underlying thing is that you are probably lonely, unhappy and in search of recognition/acceptance.

Hope you can make some friends on the forum and some recognition. You came to the right place.

Feel welcome!


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Campin_Cat
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21 Jul 2018, 10:14 am

IreneAdler wrote:
Thank you, that's really helpful. I haven't met a lot of people with Asperger's who seem to be the same.... 'type' as me. Possibly that's because everyone is different? I don't know.

Yeah, we have a saying in the community: "If you meet one person with Autism, you've met one person with autism"----as opposed to, "If you've met one, you've met them all".

IreneAdler wrote:
I have occasionally been to a group for people with Asperger's, but I've never found anyone I can relate to there really. Almost like I seem too competent socially, even though compared to NTs in social situations I am certainly not!

Yeah, I think alot of the females, here, can relate. It's cuz little girls are taught, differently----most of us are taught to be sociable (we're the ones, generally, who take care of the children, host dinner parties, and so-forth, so we HAVE TO be sociable); that's also a reason, I think, why so many of us go undiagnosed.




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White female; age 59; diagnosed Aspie.
I use caps for emphasis----I'm NOT angry or shouting. I use caps like others use italics, underline, or bold.
"What we know is a drop; what we don't know, is an ocean." (Sir Isaac Newton)