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kclark
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19 Nov 2007, 10:06 am

I think that my brain tries to process and interpret the emotions of the face when I look someone in the eye.
I seems to take over my mental processing ability because I immediately blank out when trying to talk. But when I look away for a few seconds I am able to come up with words to say.

My brain seems to work on so many things subconsciously without me attempting to do anything. But it also focuses deeply on a single thing at a time, so it seems logical that this mind blank from looking someone in the eye is related to that.



Liverbird
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19 Nov 2007, 1:14 pm

mom2bax wrote:
sorry to piggyback on your post but it caught my attention, my son has been diagnosed and i try to ensure he makes eye contact when i tell him something important, does this defeat the purpose?
why is it hard to make or maintain eye contact?
overstimulation?
is it easier to listen while looking away?
thanks


Eye contact is all about making NTs comfortable. I find eyes very distracting. I get so lost in the color that nothing else makes sense. My son is diagnosed. We can make eye contact with each other, but it's hard to do it with others. I've taught him to look at the bridge of people's noses or at their mouths when talking to them. That way they think you're listening. It hasn't got a thing to do with us. It's all about their arbitrary rules like "people who are lying avoid eye contact", "people who are untrustworthy avoid eye contact".

But in our case, when I need to say something important to my son, I often tell him to look at my mouth. That way I know he is paying attention. He drowns in eyes as well.

I think you should tell your son to look at noses or mouths. That way he's fulfilling both needs. The NT need to be looked at and the AS need to not make eye contact.


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M_LibertyGirl
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19 Nov 2007, 1:58 pm

Liverbird wrote:
mom2bax wrote:
sorry to piggyback on your post but it caught my attention, my son has been diagnosed and i try to ensure he makes eye contact when i tell him something important, does this defeat the purpose?
why is it hard to make or maintain eye contact?
overstimulation?
is it easier to listen while looking away?
thanks


Eye contact is all about making NTs comfortable. I find eyes very distracting. I get so lost in the color that nothing else makes sense. My son is diagnosed. We can make eye contact with each other, but it's hard to do it with others. I've taught him to look at the bridge of people's noses or at their mouths when talking to them. That way they think you're listening. It hasn't got a thing to do with us. It's all about their arbitrary rules like "people who are lying avoid eye contact", "people who are untrustworthy avoid eye contact".

But in our case, when I need to say something important to my son, I often tell him to look at my mouth. That way I know he is paying attention. He drowns in eyes as well.

I think you should tell your son to look at noses or mouths. That way he's fulfilling both needs. The NT need to be looked at and the AS need to not make eye contact.


I didn't get a chance to come on the board sooner.

Just wanted to say that yes, eye contact is very overstimulating for me. I don't know about everybody else.
"I" can't "look" at mouths either or anywhere else for that matter While listening. I don't know how your son is, but I can't really understand what I see unless I'm looking or hear unless listening.I'm always overfocused on one thing at a time and switching is very difficult for me. So If I'm forced to pay attention to several inputs, I get brain & sensory overload. Which makes things very rough for me When I have to. But I still can manage when it's for a very short time. Again I don't know if you're son is this way or not. But if he is I really recommend not to make him do it for longer than a very short time, It can get torturesome. I'm sorry if that doesn't make much sense. I'm not very good at expressing myself.


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scumsuckingdouchebag
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19 Nov 2007, 2:05 pm

Looking at the mouths of teachers/instructors did make it appear as if I were paying attention in class. I was anyway, even when I wasn't looking at the instructors. It became necessary once high school came around, even though I sometimes forgot to look like I was listening.

Has anyone here ever had kids make fun of them for staring down at their desk?



ghostgurl
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19 Nov 2007, 2:07 pm

I don't get anything out of it either, except for feeling overwhelmed. Also if I try to look at someone's face it just totally ruins my thinking process, so I probably wouldn't be able to have any sort of conversation with the person. So, I don't make eye contact. It's better for me and the person will understand me better if I look away.


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