why do guys want to be the alpha male?

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Kitsy
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17 Dec 2007, 6:54 am

Explain your ideas on what alpha male means and why if you do want to be one?



AdrianB
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17 Dec 2007, 7:09 am

To me, being the perfect Alpha Male resembles being a ultimately balanced male.
Having a good amount of self-confidence, good looks, charismatic, though, etc etc.

The self-contradicting concept of the Alpha Male is "Acting like you don't need a/the girl will get you a/the girl."
This can be achieved by using the typical traits of being a though/ male..



Spaceplayer
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17 Dec 2007, 7:19 am

It's biological, if the animal kingdom is any indication.



samtoo
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17 Dec 2007, 7:23 am

imo, many alpha males are people with hardly any problems at all, who think they're great and think they're strong and confident, but I really don't think this is the case.

Real strength and confidence is often from those who suffer... like us aspies.

An alpha male/alpha female describes the kind of neurotypes that I stereotypically sometimes go too far and think all neurotypes are like that...

I hate them.


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ToadOfSteel
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17 Dec 2007, 9:14 am

It's a sign that most humans are no better than the monkeys they came from...



sinsboldly
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17 Dec 2007, 9:30 am

In my not inconsiderable experience, men want to be the alpha male because they have first pick of the women to wipe their feet on. After that, they get to wipe their feet on other men.

oh, yeah, then they get to brag about it.



LePetitPrince
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17 Dec 2007, 10:35 am

because we are primates.



Wrackspurt
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17 Dec 2007, 10:47 am

There is being alpha (strong, dependable, protection, caring) in the dog world alpha is something to look up to, not abused but often challenged - it's a good thing. In the dog world alpha position can be held by either male or female depending on the dog. In my own three-dog-pack the alpha is a female (aside from female leader me of course :D ) she holds the position due to her having a stronger disposition then my two males.

Then there is ego... Is ego really what you mean here?

I like alpha males, I dislike blown-up ego..



Bigbang
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17 Dec 2007, 11:48 am

Albert Einstein, Mozart, Beethoven, Nikolai Tesla, Gandhi, Fredrick Nietsche, Jean-Paul Sartre, Isaac Newton, William Shakespeare... the list could go on.

Were any of those alpha males? No
Do I want to be an alpha male? No



caramateo
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17 Dec 2007, 2:30 pm

alpha male= independent man



Veresae
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18 Dec 2007, 4:48 pm

If we're talking stereotypes an alpha male is a manly man: muscular, sexist, homophobic, sports-loving, sex-loving, completely unromantic, slightly arrogant, confident to the point of cocky, large and leaderly and in general, a bit of an as*hole.

In reality not all alpha males are quite like this, but I still tend to not like them much.



Aspie1
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18 Dec 2007, 7:30 pm

The reason is simple. Women want to have sex with alpha males, and men look up to them and respect them. It's been that way ever since sexual reproduction came about.



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18 Dec 2007, 8:43 pm

The alpha male is a fancy of the dull mind.


There's a stumpy bald man at my workplace; whenever we are having a conversation he has to force himself into the center of attention by interrupting loudly and even banging random stuff. He acts very confidently, makes fun of others and having his workspace littered with snapshots of himself in social context. Plays music loudly, brags about random things. . .
Truth is, I can tell he is resentful about his mediocre post at his age - and he can't keep the facade up forever; especially at the morning when you see him limping into the office an hour and a half late with his usual "Bah! everything sucks!" look.
That's as close as it comes to the alpha male in everyday observation.

I know a lot of people with these traits - some of them young - and, while they do control some things in the social context, only a few truly pay attention to the crap they say and life goes on. They never fail to strike me as superficial jerks with an unsatisfied need for superiority driving them - they also make me think they believe in something like the alpha male and are trying to act it up. True leadership differs with groups and it's not as simple.

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Also, the "alpha male" seems to be a very popular subject matter in forums with a lot of people not getting laid - I don't see people discussing the alpha male much elsewhere. I'd bet the alpha male hasn't heard of himself.

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Maybe. . . just maybe. . . American culture allows for the illusion that such thing as an alpha male with those specific traits is the archetype of a successful person. For example, boasting is more socially frowned upon where I live and you don't hear much of a winner-loser dichotomy (outside of american media, that is).



sinsboldly
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18 Dec 2007, 11:37 pm

Aspie1 wrote:
The reason is simple. Women want to have sex with alpha males, and men look up to them and respect them. It's been that way ever since sexual reproduction came about.


Hummm. . I am a woman and I love sticking it to the Alpha Male. I don't want to lay him. Matter of fact I want him to suffer. And he does, because all the Alpha Males want the Alpha Female.

'specially when they can't get her.

and that always made me laugh.

Merle



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19 Dec 2007, 9:59 pm

People generally view being an alpha male as having all the desirable qualities a man can have. You're asking why do people want to be the best. Also, they view those are the qualities that fit the perfect man for females.



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19 Dec 2007, 10:31 pm

The power to really own and control your environment. I tend to be one also who believes that if good is truly to triumph over evil in this world, good has to be even more diesel. Regardless of what we want, honor is something we still hold fast to in this life and honor of course in terms of competition and social status is earning your right to be where your at one way or another.

While I've had macho relatives who tried to pound it into me that there's two types of people in this world - hammers and nails, I'd still say its a lot more multifaceted than that. I'd prefer to have the capabilities of being a hammer but at the same time show better judgment - these are the people who are really respected. While less fight-oriented people who are honorable and good people are still respected to a point, there's still that subconscious debate over whether they could really make it any other way - that ability to really tare things up and make s--- happen isn't there so much and people almost need to see for sure that you're choosing the better of two paths because you would no matter how much power you have.

So in the end, its just a matter of having more bridges, more opportunities, more ability to make your life exactly what you want it to be rather than having life, its rules, the alpha to omega hierarchy, and particularly the rules of attraction all bearing down on you and dictating to you that you can't have x, y, and z because you aren't genetically worthy or because a, b, and c happened to you early in your development which scarred your self-perception in almost irreparable ways.