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WurdBendur
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27 Dec 2007, 11:18 pm

As far as I know, insecurity is not normally considered an AS trait. As for myself, I think my constant failure in social situations has lead me to withdraw and develop a low self-esteem and insecurity.


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IpsoRandomo
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28 Dec 2007, 12:34 am

ButchCoolidge wrote:
Well, they influence your chances of admission to the next level of schooling, for one thing.

As for insecurity, I'm sure there are lots of terribly insecure aspies, but from what I understand and from personal experience, AS can also manifest in an almost egomaniacal self-centeredness which could almost be the opposite of insecurity... then again, most people who are overly secure in their beliefs are actually, subconsciously, insecure, so it's pretty tough to pin down.


It's interesting that you bring that up. Maybe more socially succesful aspies are more egomaniacal (nothing certain, just a thought). For one thing, almost every account I've heard of aspy husbands tends to indicate that aspy husbands are percieved by their wives as overly self-absorbed. Second, I've done better than most aspies my age but am sometimes more egotistical than I should be, and that was especially true for me as a young child.

Perhaps self-centered individuals are more motivated to gain more for themselves (not saying self-centeredness is good or having more makes you happier).



MusicMaker1
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28 Dec 2007, 12:47 am

I think anyone that has difficulty understanding people around them and others' intentions would feel insecure. Not getting the jokes, nuances, body language, etc.. can be similar to being a foreigner in another country and not speaking the language of all those around you. No matter how hard you try, you can never really learn their language completely. This can lead to alot of misunderstandings. For instance, you can think someone could be a friend, but then later be betrayed by them and find out they disliked you from the beginning... Being misunderstood and hurt continuously in life will naturally lead to a person feeling insecure. imho.



Irisrises
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28 Dec 2007, 8:43 am

Hypersensitivity and being picked on leads to insecurity, in my case. But at the same time, not trusting anyone other than myself makes me very comfortable with myself. I've always been there for me. So I'm secure in that sense.

I usually think there are deep levels that I have a better grasp on than most people and there are superficial levels that I can read fairly quickly, but there is a midlevel where 95% of human interaction takes place where I don't have the necessary tools. So I compensate by developing the depth and the surface, just like a person without legs compensates by having very strong arms, and it works okay.



busy91
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28 Dec 2007, 8:48 am

I think it is an outcome of having AS.

I used to be insecure as a child, a teen and a young woman. I was bullied, teased...blah blah blah, so that made me feel bad about myself. Of course I was picked on because I was different. I started to overcome my insecurity when I was about 18 years old, it took a while longer to become totally over it. Now I just say, Screw it, and move on.

Of course there are situations where I feel insecure, but as a way of life, not any more.


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