Why do I have a hard time expressing my thoughts coherently?

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StefanoB
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29 Aug 2010, 2:34 am

I had many of these same issues, and it took about a decade for me, with the help of many others, to find out what the core problem was.

It turned out to be a working memory deficit, which was confirmed by a few neuropsychological tests.

One thing that clued the neuropsychologist in was that my IQ score, broken down into the four subcomponents, had a spread of three standard deviations. My vocabulary score was two standard deviations above the norm, while my processing speed was one standard deviation BELOW the norm. The other two scores were one standard deviation above average. The psychologist that administered the IQ test thought the low processing speed was due to anxiety and the desire for perfection - but my clinical psychologist said this is the default answer, and means they don't really know why it's low. He said it was especially bogus because it was also noted how rapidly I did some of the other tests that time wasn't counted as part of the score, and if it was anxiety, those speed times (which they noted but didn't use in the score calculation) would have been slower too.

Another thing that clued the neuropsychologist in was that my CAPD testing showed that I had a hearing threshold above the 95th percentile.

The neuropsychologist said the high vocabulary combined with the low hearing threshold meant that my brain was trying to compensate for the working memory deficit by overdeveloping my auditory system. (BTW, I think only in sound. No pictures, nothing visual.) He said it's like what happens when someone can't use their legs for mobility and have to use a wheelchair. Their arms get overdeveloped because they are taking on much more of a load. While their arms may be much stronger than the average person's, the arms can only partially compensate for legs.

Now, lest someone think I have an overinflated ego and am bragging about the high vocabulary and hearing - allow me to reiterate that my processing speed is significantly below average. Out in the world, I am treated as dimmer than the average bulb, and am unemployable. When I was younger I had an ego, but it has long since been ground into dust. Oh, hell, I still have an ego, but can't do anything with it except come off like the bitter old cynic I've become.

And on that note, OP, you might want to see if you can have your working memory tested. Working memory deficits play a big part in Executive Dysfunction as well, and ED is common to both ASD and ADD - and I am diagnosed with both, and with ED as well.


MathGirl wrote:
If I am reciting something by rote, I can speak very fluently. My main problem seems to be not being able to talk and to think at the same time - I need the pauses in order to think of what I'm going to say next. And when people talk non-stop, well, I end up not being able to say much at all.

That's exactly it! I can't use the auditory system to both think AND hold something in memory. Reciting something by rote comes from a different area of memory, and avoids the conflict. I'll bet it's not much of a problem to just ramble/free associate, either - also because there's no auditory working memory conflict to deal with.

I can't think when someone is talking, either. Makes conversation difficult, especially if coherent replies (as opposed to grunt and nod replies) are expected. I have just as much problem with writing as I do talking, you just can't detect the pauses and heavy use of cut/paste to rearrange the ideas, or that it takes a few hours to compose a post of this length.



freddie120284
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15 Aug 2011, 3:06 pm

Hey folks! I'm new to this board and wanted to respond to this post. :)

I too have difficulty expressing myself verbally. I just left a job interview a few hours ago, and I answered all of the questions in an inane rambling fashion, leaving the committee baffled as to what I was saying; I too was wondering where I was going with the points I was TRYING to make. It's as if my brain is missing some vital piece which would allow me to conherently create ideas. Granted, I haven't been diagnosed, but after reading some of your posts, I feel I may be finding an answer as to what's going on in my head.

Cheers!
-Freddie-



dopplercb
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15 Aug 2011, 4:14 pm

I usually can't find the words to articulate what I want to say. like my therapist will ask me what I am thinking and my mind empties. he has grown tired of my automatic answer of I don't know, and presses me to the point that I stop trying to figure me out and just try to figure out what HE wants to hear from me and try to go from there. I have a hard time telling anyone how I feel usually, so, in real life anyway, I don't unless asked, and then it is brain freeze time. sometimes I can sit through a whole therapy session and make next to no comments, or just answer yes, no, and I don't know. drives my therapist nuts.