An aspie of a different nature

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hi!

im in college too... but it's just me and the test tubes... so, no social constraints there, really.

It's the text books for me. I have to read something EVERY single night. That's my social life.

Look, people like to create clicques because it makes them comfortable to be with people of their own beliefs. Hence interracial friends/dating/marriage is such a big subject and that's why we had apartheid

Look, Dale Carnegie said it best, "Find yourself and be yourself"

People will be happy (in the long run) that you didn't decide to be another brick in the wall.

A horse of a different colour topic

How are you different? Do you mean unusual even amongst those who have been told they are unusual (as if)? Dare to be different!

17,000+ people can be Wrong!

Well...Come!

Hi SF

I'm new to here as well. So I thought I'd try a few posts.

I read your comments, you seem a bit anti all NTs(I'm not normally into labels). Not all people are shallow, well I reckon about half are.

Anyway it may be worthwhile to work on your social skills.

If you are in a negative mood, that will really drive people away.
Analyse some of your behaviour, there may be some things that you naturally do that a appear rude or offensive to people, they may seem normal to you but other people could take them the wrong way.

If you get builled learn how to stick up for yourself, it may be hard for a start, but you will get better at it with practice. If you stick up for yourself, people have more respect for you. (Don't become a bully yourself though). If you get builled don't let it get you down, think of it as a game. Buillies usually pick on other people because they don't feel good about themselves. Seriously you can cut anyone down to size, everybody has there weak points.

Also it maybe good to explain your condition to people, most people havn't heard of it.

Also dress sence, I've found people really judge you on how dress (shallow I know). That one is easy to change. One thing at a time.

Note I'm trying to give you a few tips, I wouldn't have a clue if they will help you or not.

Also you'll make heaps of friends here, there are masses of people that the same as you. hmmm you seem a bit ordinary here

Social_Fantom
From a Kiwi Aspie sister, I'm with you we have been put down and misunderstood for far to long and feel its about time the NT realized there is a fact a whole lot of people who are just different, we do not need advice or be told how to change - just acceptances and understanding...

I think once people get to know you properly that helps.

I've had people disliking me for no reason, when I didn't even know them. Once people get to know me better they tend to like me.

What do you mean by?
Probably because they're afraid of me now. WHAT DID YOU DO? lol. I'm curious!!

On a completely different question? Can you handle critisism ok, I've kind of become a bit socially paranoid of saying things that offend people. I wonder if I can say anything to people with aspergers and relax a bit more when I talk. I always have a bit of a habbit of saying things that are a bit borderline to some people without realising it. I or we think more logically rather than emotionally about things..

To asplanet

>From a Kiwi Aspie sister, I'm with you we have been put down and misunderstood for far to long and feel its about time the NT >realized there is a fact a whole lot of people who are just different, we do not need advice or be told how to change - just >acceptances and understanding...

Yeah I agree with you, but there are also advantages to fitting in as well, like it or not it does make life easier. Don't change yourself as a person and be someone you are not. Think of social skills as a useful toolbox to use, thats how I see them. Good to work on them.

> I have spent a life time of fitting in, did it bring me happiness NO, as I get older I withdraw more into my own ways and find with > the confidence of being me, comes greater happiness than a life time of pretending...

hmm I like to fight through life, when ever I have a problem I just fight it. That seems to work best for me. I enjoy happiness when it comes.

Yeah it is good to find what works best for you.

Asplanet. Great web site by the way. Had a bit of a read.

How shall I put this. I've done a bit of self analyse of my problems I have. In the end I've discovered that my problems are real and a can't solve them. I've just accepted them, I'm ok with that, who doesn't have problems? With you trying to raise awareness about Aspergers Syndrome, don't get me wrong good on you. But are you sure you are not trying to put your problems on to other people.

When you said.

>From a Kiwi Aspie sister, I'm with you we have been put down and misunderstood for far to long and feel its about time the NT >realized there is a fact a whole lot of people who are just different, we do not need advice or be told how to change - just >acceptances and understanding...

it sounds a bit like you are saying that people with NT have the problem not people with AS.