Do aspies socialize worse than NTs, or just differently?

Page 1 of 3 [ 33 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3  Next


Do aspies socialize worse than NTs, or just differently?
Differently (and I have not spoken to another aspie IRL) 26%  26%  [ 17 ]
Worse (and I have not to another aspie IRL) 12%  12%  [ 8 ]
Differently (and I HAVE spoken to another aspie IRL) 40%  40%  [ 26 ]
Worse (and I HAVE spoken to another aspie IRL) 8%  8%  [ 5 ]
Differently (and I am not an aspie) 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
Worse (and I am not an aspie) 2%  2%  [ 1 ]
I don't know 12%  12%  [ 8 ]
Total votes : 65

Tempy
Toucan
Toucan

User avatar

Joined: 23 Jul 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 296

23 Mar 2008, 12:04 am

Differently (and I have not spoken to another aspie IRL)



Brandon-J
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Mar 2008
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 669
Location: North Carolina, USA

23 Mar 2008, 2:21 am

I've havent had the chance to meet somebody with aspergers before so I don't know. I feel like I socialize worst than NT's simple because my mind just goes blank and I have nothin to say. But most of the time it's not like Im scared of talking.



LostInEmulation
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 10 Feb 2008
Age: 41
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,047
Location: Ireland, dreaming of Germany

23 Mar 2008, 2:34 am

I'd say we socialize differently. If NTs were a minority, THEY would be dxed with needing too much interaction and being unable to communicate. :)


_________________
I am not a native speaker. Please contact me if I made grammatical mistakes in the posting above.

Penguins cannot fly because what cannot fly cannot crash!


howzat
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Aug 2007
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,802
Location: Hornsey North London

23 Mar 2008, 6:48 am

I would say we socialize differently n there is always room for improvement i know we will never match NTs standards but im happy da way iam n wouldn't change for being an NT.



Social_Fantom
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 22 Feb 2008
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 10,895
Location: Trapped outside of the space time continuum

23 Mar 2008, 10:04 am

Differently, anyone that understands what we mean will agree. I've never had the pleasure of meeting another aspie face to face so that is just what I have seen in my own experience.


_________________
So simple, it's complicated


CockneyRebel
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jul 2004
Age: 49
Gender: Male
Posts: 113,289
Location: Stalag 13

23 Mar 2008, 10:08 am

I think that we each have different communication styles. None is better than the other, though it may seem that way, to both parties.


_________________
Who wants to adopt a Sweet Pea?


Social_Fantom
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 22 Feb 2008
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 10,895
Location: Trapped outside of the space time continuum

23 Mar 2008, 10:26 am

True, different isn't always better or worse.


_________________
So simple, it's complicated


nomad21
Toucan
Toucan

User avatar

Joined: 16 Feb 2008
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 276

23 Mar 2008, 10:45 am

I think different. I am not good at all with talking to NTs, but my best friend in real life who is also my neighbor is an Aspie, we get along perfectly and hang out alot.



Icheb
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Sep 2007
Age: 59
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,918
Location: Switzerland

23 Mar 2008, 11:08 am

I think the following passage on engineers from “The Dilbert Principle” is wonderfully apposite:

“Normal” people expect to accomplish several unrealistic things from social interaction:

• Stimulating and thought-provoking conversation
• Important social contacts
• A feeling of connectedness with other humans

These goals are irrational and stupid. (...) To an engineer, most “normal” people are intellectually indistinguishable from Mexican jumping beans with faces. Feeling “connected” with carbon-based dolts holds all the joy of being handcuffed to a dead zebra - it sounds special, but it can get old fast.
In contrast to “normal” people, engineers have rational objectives for social interaction:

• Get it over with as soon as possible.
• Avoid getting invited to something unpleasant.
• Demonstrate mental superiority and mastery of all subjects.

These are sensible goals and ones that can produce great joy. The social skill of an engineer must be evaluated on the basis of these rational objectives, not on the basis of bizarre and nonsensical societal standards.



2ukenkerl
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 19 Jul 2007
Age: 63
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,231

23 Mar 2008, 11:35 am

Icheb,

WELL PUT! AND, like mexican jumping beans, normal people want you to think they are almost magical at times, but they have no real magic, just like the jumping bean:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mexican_jumping_beans

I just HAD to add that little bit of trivia! :lol:



Kaleido
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Feb 2007
Age: 65
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,615

23 Mar 2008, 11:37 am

I have been thinking about this all afternoon and I think its differently, all I know is that I am more comfortable with my aspie friends because we don't have to talk about fashion and diets too much.



Sarcastic_Name
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Mar 2005
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,593

23 Mar 2008, 12:09 pm

Icheb wrote:
I think the following passage on engineers from “The Dilbert Principle” is wonderfully apposite:

“Normal” people expect to accomplish several unrealistic things from social interaction:

• Stimulating and thought-provoking conversation
• Important social contacts
• A feeling of connectedness with other humans

These goals are irrational and stupid. (...) To an engineer, most “normal” people are intellectually indistinguishable from Mexican jumping beans with faces. Feeling “connected” with carbon-based dolts holds all the joy of being handcuffed to a dead zebra - it sounds special, but it can get old fast.
In contrast to “normal” people, engineers have rational objectives for social interaction:

• Get it over with as soon as possible.
• Avoid getting invited to something unpleasant.
• Demonstrate mental superiority and mastery of all subjects.

These are sensible goals and ones that can produce great joy. The social skill of an engineer must be evaluated on the basis of these rational objectives, not on the basis of bizarre and nonsensical societal standards.

Thanks for making me feel normal.

I think people with AS communicate worse, since the standard would be NT. It may be different, but it's not the same as the standard. I happen to have no problem having a conversation with most people, especially after a drink. I've never knowlingly met another person with AS, so I didn't realize I have my own bizarre communication style.


_________________
Hello.


rifler39
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 16 Mar 2008
Age: 85
Gender: Male
Posts: 168
Location: Moses Lake, WA

23 Mar 2008, 2:13 pm

I have often wondered in my life why I could hold two or more conversations at a time with one person, but not with most. Having spent most of my working life in the nerd community, I have been thrown together with many aspergers. I enjoy working with and being with them much more than with neurotypicals. Only after having discovered that such a thing as AS is defined have I realized that great minds do, indeed, think alike. :lol: :P :lol:

Pops


_________________
Tools are dangerous only while being controlled by a human.


Grey_Kameleon
Pileated woodpecker
Pileated woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 20 Feb 2008
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 193

23 Mar 2008, 11:34 pm

I think it comes down to personal opinion. And personally, I would rather listen to someone ramble on about a personal interest than expect me to make trivial smalltalk. I'll vote 'differently'.



Thatmew
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Mar 2008
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,959

24 Mar 2008, 1:45 pm

I think aspies commuincate diffrently, mostly without speaking, and without much nonsence. It can be hard to start a conversation, but on a topic of intrest, it is a diffrent story. But, I don't know if I have spoken with a fellow aspie. (What is IRL?!)



rifler39
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 16 Mar 2008
Age: 85
Gender: Male
Posts: 168
Location: Moses Lake, WA

24 Mar 2008, 2:16 pm

IRL = In Real Life

Pops


_________________
Tools are dangerous only while being controlled by a human.