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Delirium
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28 Dec 2008, 8:00 pm

"Does the evolutionary doctrine clash with religious faith? It does not. It is a blunder to mistake the Holy Scriptures for elementary textbooks of astronomy, geology, biology, and antrhopology. Only if symbols are construed to mean what they are not intended to mean can there arise imaginary, insoluble conflicts. As pointed out above, the blunder leads to blasphemy: the Creator is accused of systematic deceitfulness." - Theodosius Dobzhansky

Every single fundie Christian needs to read this quote over and over again until it is embedded in their minds. And then follow it up with this quote from the same guy:

"The evolution of life, and the evolutionary origin of mankind, are scientifically established as firmly and completely as any historical event not witnessed by human observers. Any concession to anti-evolutionists, suggesting that there are scientific reasons to doubt the facticity of evolution, would be propagating a plain untruth."

And fundie Muslims should read this quote:

"Religion is very easy and whoever overburdens himself in his religion will not be able to continue in that way. So you should not be extremists, but try to be near to perfection and receive the good tidings that you will be rewarded." - Muhammad


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eristocrat
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28 Dec 2008, 8:06 pm

From the show "Bottom":

Eddie: That's it! I'm going to write to my M.P.
Richie: Why?
Eddie: Because I love her!
Richie: [emphatically] Eddie! Tony Blair is a man! :lmao:

"Cathy!Cathy!Cathy!Cathy!" -- Bob Maloogaloogaloogaloogalooga

Homo sum: humani nil a me alienum puto -- Terence



28 Dec 2008, 9:34 pm

Benny & Joon quotes:


Ms. Smail: When a boat runs ashore, the sea has spoken.

Joon: I have every right to be outside officer, I have every right
Officer: Yes ma'am, can I see some ID please?

Joon: I've been known to play a little cards

Joon: Medium sized the green hair troll

Benny: Joon we gotta go
Mike: A flush. Full house. Yes yes. Oh Benny tonight's your lucky night
Thomas: Mike warned her it was for keeps Benny
Benny: What? What was for keeps?
Joon: I lost
Benny: What's in the pot?
Joon: A cousin

Joon: You're out of your tree
Sam: It's not my tree.
Benny: I think I need a beer

Sam: Joon?
Joon: What?"
Sam: I-I love you.
Joon: Me too.
(door opens)
Joon: Don't tell Benny
Sam: Okay

Benny: Do you get to a point in your life where nothing makes any a sense?

Benny: Can I tell you something?
Ruthie: Okay
Benny: My life is complicated and-
Ruthie: Give me a break Benny I just offered you a beer


Ruthie: Haven't we tried this before?
Benny: My life is a lot less complicated

(wham)
Benny: What the hell is he doing?
Joon: Mash potatoes

Joon: Some cultures are defined by their relationship to cheese
Benny: Is that a fact?


Joon: He can really cook can he?
Benny: Uh yeah for grilled cheese I might have used the wool setting
Joon: That's what I told him
Benny: really? What did he use?
Joon: Rayon. Silk would have been to soggy and cotton would have-
Benny: Would have burned it
Joon: Right. Fortunately he consulted me before giving it steam. I was fore square against it. I wish he could be my new smail.



Sam: You don't like raisins?
Joon: Not really
Sam: Why?
Joon: They used to be fat and juicy. Now they're twisted. They have their lives stolen. They taste sweet but really they're just humiliated grapes. I can't say I'm a big supporter of the raisin council
Sam: Did you see those raisins on TV, the ones that sing and dance and stuff?
Joon: They scare me
Sam: Yeah me too
Joon: It's sick. The commercial people make them sing and dance so people will eat them
Sam: It's a shame about raisins
Joon: Cannibals.
Sam: Yeah. Do you like avocados?
Joon: They're a fruit you know
Sam: Ruthie. Do you have any avocados?

Joon: Why don't we pick up Ruthie and get some ice cream?
Sam: Yeah lets get her
Benny: No
Sam: Why?
Benny: 'cause she doesn't want to talk to me
Sam: Oh


Joon: Did you have to go to school for that?
Sam: No no I got thrown out of school for that
Joon: Really?
Sam: Oh yeah



I could recite the whole movie but then it make this post too long. :P



IdahoRose
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30 Dec 2008, 11:41 am

"God made you the way you are, and He just wants you to be happy."

- My mom to me

"Trust me, you don't want to make the whole world your enemy. But at the very least, you do have one friend in me."

- Abel Nightroad, Trinity Blood, episode 2



Dollypony
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30 Dec 2008, 12:17 pm

There is no difficulty that enough love will not conquer; no disease that enough love will not heal; no door that enough love will not open; no gulf that enough love will not bridge; no wall that enough love will not throw down; no sin that enough love will not redeem...
Emmet Fox

Without the assistance of the Divine Being---I cannot succeed. With that assistance, I cannot fail.
Abraham Lincoln

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference
Robert Frost



glider18
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31 Dec 2008, 12:49 am

This is my quote about people who rudely pull out in front of me on the road.

"Pull out in front of me---turn within a mile."

It always seems like when a car pulls out in front of me it will turn within a mile. The ones that get me the most are the ones that run a stop sign just to get on the road so they don't have to wait on me. Where I live it is very common for people to practice this rude driving habit.



Kimmy
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31 Dec 2008, 2:53 pm

"The cake is a lie"-From the game "Portal".

This next quote may seem morbid, but it's interesting because it's true:
"But the one thing they love more than a hero, is to see a hero fail, fall, die trying."-Green Goblin from the Spiderman movie.

It's true, we love the dramatics of tragety. And in the movies/video games/comic books in witch the hero suffers, we see this as "suspence." One of the prime examples is the story of Romeo and Juliet.


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Prosser
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31 Dec 2008, 3:42 pm

^Portal quote, nice



"I hope this isn't CHRIS's blood!"
Barry-Resident Evil

"FECK OFF CUP!"
Jack- Father Ted

"Buck derk derk alah. Derka derka, mohammad gihard. Hacka sherpa sherpa, abuckalah"
Gary- Team America (I couldn't translate for this one, sorry)


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Prof_Pretorius
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02 Jan 2009, 11:56 am

"Get away from me boy, you bother me."
~W.C. Fields


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JetLag
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02 Jan 2009, 1:48 pm

I'm not confused. I'm just well mixed. -Robert Frost


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QuantumCowboy
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02 Jan 2009, 2:04 pm

"Religion without science is blind.
Science without religion is lame."

- Albert Einstein


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Prof_Pretorius
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02 Jan 2009, 5:46 pm

"...every tree in the forest will fall."

~Jim McCord, a CIA executive responding to a plea from the White House for the CIA to take responsibility for the Watergate break-in.


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I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow. I feel my fate in what I cannot fear. I learn by going where I have to go. ~Theodore Roethke


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02 Jan 2009, 6:57 pm

"Death is the road to awe." (The Fountain)


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Sandulf
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02 Jan 2009, 8:41 pm

"Some cultures are defined by their relationship to cheese" - Joon

"I love the Pope, I love seeing him in his Pope-Mobile, his three feet of bullet proof plexi-glass. That's faith in action folks! You know he's got God on his side."- Bill Hicks

"Maybe we need to stop trying to get our children to conform and let them be who they are, stop trying to change them and educate society that there is in fact a whole group of people who are just different... "- Alyson Bradley

"If the companion cube could talk, and we would like to take this opportunity to remind you that it cannot, it would tell you to go on without it, because it would rather die in a fire than be a burden to you." - GLaDOS

"You spend your whole life believing that you're on the right track, only to discover that you're on the wrong train."



Alicat1989
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03 Jan 2009, 1:55 am

Queer as folk
[Roy has just rammed Stuart's car after spotting him kissing his son]
Stuart Alan Jones: What the **** are you doing?
Roy Maloney: Fifteen! That boy is fifteen!
Stuart Alan Jones: So? The car is only six months old and you've still buggered it.



03 Jan 2009, 2:31 am

Joon: You need me to be sick


Ruthie: Hey pal, we're trying to work here if you don't mind

Worker in video store: Hello
Sam: I wanna help.
Worker in video store: Ah wonderful. Okay. I would like you to fill out this application and I will be right with you


Joon: (starts mumbling) I can't hear you I can't hear you

Joon: (crying) No I am not I am not

Sam: Sir sir stop the bus please? Please stop the bus?


Benny: 18-15
Joon: 17-16
Benny: 18-15
Joon: It caught the corner
Benny: It was a foot off the table
Joon: It was not
Benny: Juniper
Joon: Benjamin, don't underestimate the mentally ill we know how to count
Benny: Okay fine 17-16
Joon: You can't give me what was already mine. You're trying to cheat
Benny: I'm not cheating
Joon: You're cheating
Benny: Joon, I don't cheat. You're the one who's cheating
Joon: You're all trying to cheat me, you're trying to cheat.