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Miyah
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14 Oct 2008, 6:45 am

Has anyone in here ever known someone on the spectrum who was a hypocrite? I did. When I was 19, I worked with another man with AS, like myself, and he wanted to mingle with the neurotypicals. In addition, this young man had a problem of shooting his mouth off at me while on the clock or even out at the employee events. Beyond that, he admitted to me one time that he had to pretend to hate me infront of his friends because they hated me.

This is a long time ago now and I haven't seen him in 5 years but he pulled other things not long after that.

Does anyone in here have one like that to share?



BelindatheNobody
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14 Oct 2008, 6:48 am

I'm actually hypocritical myself, sometimes.
It's funny, because I hate hypocricey.... yet I end up doing it myself sometimes.
It's both ironic and paradoxal, lol.


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Miyah
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14 Oct 2008, 6:49 am

Gotcha.



BelindatheNobody
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14 Oct 2008, 6:54 am

*Shrug*
I think everyone ends up being hypocritical at least once in their life, though.


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14 Oct 2008, 8:57 am

BelindatheNobody wrote:
I'm actually hypocritical myself, sometimes.
It's funny, because I hate hypocricey.... yet I end up doing it myself sometimes.
It's both ironic and paradoxal, lol.

Why is a hypocrite being hypocritical about hypocrisy a paradox?



Chimchar
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14 Oct 2008, 9:05 am

Did you say you were 19? How old was he? Well, being an aspie and having difficulty making friends the way neurotypicals do, it's no surprise. Heck I lied to my classmates saying that Obama was my second cousin, and I'm Vannessa William's niece. They believed me! :lol:



sbcmetroguy
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14 Oct 2008, 9:17 am

I hate hypocrites and mean people anyway, regardless of AS, NT, or whatever.

I only recently discovered that I believe I have AS based on the ways I have been different from everyone around me my entire life. I have always had NT friends because I never knew anyone else even remotely similar to me. But my NT "friends" were all hypocrites, with the exception of one or two. It was many years before I realized I was being treated like crap by these so-called "friends."

I think when this became most obvious to me was when I was trying to hook up with this girl as a teenager and my "best friend" swooped right in and took her from me. I mean while I was working my non-magic (because I have never been good with females) he started talking trash behind my back, pretending to be in love with her (he just wanted to "get some"), and literally stole her from my arms. It hurt me so bad, and it was one of the only times in my life I ever got that hurt by someone who was supposed to be a friend.

Anyway, take this with a grain of salt because I am not diagnosed with AS yet, but I feel certain I will be soon. So I feel like I can understand this situation based on my own personal experiences with normal people and their often jerkish ways. I will never understand people, and I'm glad I found WP because I always say I feel like I come from a different planet than everyone else around me.



ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo
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14 Oct 2008, 9:21 am

I have known lots of hypocrites. I haven't been around people on the spectrum except for WP, (if they have AS in real life, I didn't know it) have been around what WPers would call "NTs", also people with various mental illnesses and addiction issues.
Hypocritical thinking is very common. I don't see why someone with an ASD would be exempt from this.



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14 Oct 2008, 10:06 am

Hypocrisy is not exclusively an NT trait; Aspers are some of the worst hypocrites I've ever met.


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mikibacsi1124
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14 Oct 2008, 10:58 am

I admit to having acted this way in high school. I was just desperate to fit in, or at the very least to not be a total outcast. I should have known that I was only further shooting myself in the foot by acting like that.



14 Oct 2008, 11:30 am

I think lot of aspies are. I read that lot of us are irony.
When I was a kid, I did things but when kids did them to me, I didn't like it but continued doing it to others. I just didn't get it. But I eventually learned.


I knew an aspie boy and he got upset when a four yea old wrecked his project he made in school and he karate chopped him. Of course he got in trouble by his parents but he turned around and wrecked my parents hammock they got down in Mexico. He expects people to care for his things but he doesn't care about other peoples stuff? My mother said that was his AS.


I have noticed bullies are the same way. They like putting other people down, but yet when it's done to them, they don't like it.


Quote:
I hate hypocrites and mean people anyway, regardless of AS, NT, or whatever.




Does that mean you hate yourself, your family, everyone in the world?


Everyone is a hypocrite. Heck people can be hypocritical and not even know it. I know I'm one. Niceness is hypocritical. :lol:



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14 Oct 2008, 12:38 pm

Haven't been Aspie-aware long enough to know if anybody other than myself is Aspie, except on WP, and I don't think I've ever detected it in posts.

I don't see any particular reason why hypocrisy would happen more in AS. I'm using "one who fails to practice what they preach," as my definition. Somebody who doesn't live up to their own declared standards.

I think hypocrisy can vary in strength from unintended inconsistencies (which I'm sure we all do), to the full blown form where somebody is lovely to your face while trying to rip you off, kill you, exclude you, or whatever.

Your example of the guy who was friendly to you while his "real" friends were away but happy to be unfriendly to you in front of them just so they'd like him more - yes that's a pretty bad kind of hypocrisy, and my pride wouldn't let me have anything more to do with him either. I don't see any future in it, except for elitists.

Me, I'm bound to be guilty of inconsistencies, but I hope I've done nothiing that bad. I'd rather be alone than befriend somebody just as a stopgap until something better comes along. I've deserted people but that was never the idea at the outset, and when I look behind the guilt, it could be argued that there was contributory negligence on their part.



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14 Oct 2008, 8:37 pm

I suppose everyone is a hypocrite in their own right.

I just dislike the aspie ones who cliam to be neurodiverse and then tear down every other disorder in the book. :(


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BelindatheNobody
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14 Oct 2008, 10:27 pm

Since wrote:
BelindatheNobody wrote:
I'm actually hypocritical myself, sometimes.
It's funny, because I hate hypocricey.... yet I end up doing it myself sometimes.
It's both ironic and paradoxal, lol.

Why is a hypocrite being hypocritical about hypocrisy a paradox?


From dictionary.com wrote:
Paradox:
1. a statement or proposition that seems self-contradictory or absurd but in reality expresses a possible truth.
2. a self-contradictory and false proposition.
3. any person, thing, or situation exhibiting an apparently contradictory nature.
4. an opinion or statement contrary to commonly accepted opinion.


I don't see how it wouldn't be a paradox. :?


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14 Oct 2008, 11:07 pm

Well, 2 and 4 are out, and I don't think that it's got enough surprise to merit being called a paradox.
I guess it's a matter of personal taste.



BelindatheNobody
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15 Oct 2008, 5:06 am

"Seems self-contradictory or absurd". It is how I see it. *Shrug*

1, 2 and 4 would be "personal taste", yes.

But it also fits perfectly with 3, and I don't see how that one is "personal taste".

But whatever, lol. Not a big deal either way.


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