Girl in class nearly gave me a meltdown

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jd1515
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06 Dec 2008, 1:28 pm

I've realized over the years that NT's don't like it when you speak up in class, even when the teacher asks a question and nobody else raises their hand to answer. I don't understand this, maybe I just go to a bad college where people don't care. Personally, I always have more respect for a teacher who just randomly calls on people to see if they know their stuff. What I did was put a quota on the number of comments I made in my classes (2 questions/comments per every half hour of class time unless we are having a class debate about an issue, while trying to keep from rambling on) although I still want to answer every question. However, you shouldn't have to stop if you don't want to. Only the last day of class, just ask her why she has a problem with you being engaged in discussion. From my experience, they can't answer that question and often end up spluttering.



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07 Dec 2008, 12:30 am

MizLiz wrote:
I had a girl like that in one of my poetry classes one year. So what did I do about it?

The next time one of my poems had to be workshopped in front of the whole class... it was about her.

But the thing is, the barb was so subtle that she didn't get it. Maybe four people (and the prof) got it, but she didn't.

Got an A on that poem and my revenge since the people who DID get it realized what a stupid b***h she was when she wasn't horribly offended. 8)
Of course now I want to read the poem!


Good response to that girl's b****y behaviour, I've struggled to allow myself to do so when I get upset like that.



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07 Dec 2008, 4:25 am

I'd just backhand her across the face.

She insults my honour, I demand recompse!

*Shrugs* Maybe that's why I wasn't well liked.

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07 Dec 2008, 2:53 pm

I don't want to post the poem. It's hard to understand when taken out of context.



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08 Dec 2008, 12:07 am

Yo, it seems like b***h has an attitude problem.

Just tell her she's fat and slu*ty. Girls hate that.



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08 Dec 2008, 1:14 am

jkrane wrote:
Yo, it seems like b***h has an attitude problem.

Just tell her she's fat and slu*ty. Girls hate that.

Just in case this is a serious response, I thought I should make it clear that this is a bad idea. Every girl in ear's reach will then think you're a total a-hole.


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08 Dec 2008, 1:16 pm

Kirska wrote:
jkrane wrote:
Yo, it seems like b***h has an attitude problem.

Just tell her she's fat and slu*ty. Girls hate that.

Just in case this is a serious response, I thought I should make it clear that this is a bad idea. Every girl in ear's reach will then think you're a total a-hole.


That isn't far from the truth. Although none of my female tormentors were overweight, calling them names like the other name you mentioned didn't do much good, it only made matters worse, including a threat from the principal for calling a girl a b****. I didn't care much about what the other females thought of me in high school, since my parents didn't believe in teenagers dating, I didn't care if I ever had a girl interested in me or not. I didn't even think I wanted female friends at the time, based on all the negative experiences I had with my mother and sister.

I think alot of schools don't want to discipline girls like they do boys. In more than one school, I saw girls get away with all sorts of things with no consequences(including my sister punching out a kid in front of a teacher and getting no discipline at all, while I did the same thing and had to serve after school detention), while boys get the book thrown at them for the slightest indiscretion. It's just so unfair.


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Kirska
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08 Dec 2008, 1:48 pm

PrisonerSix wrote:
That isn't far from the truth. Although none of my female tormentors were overweight, calling them names like the other name you mentioned didn't do much good, it only made matters worse, including a threat from the principal for calling a girl a b****. I didn't care much about what the other females thought of me in high school, since my parents didn't believe in teenagers dating, I didn't care if I ever had a girl interested in me or not. I didn't even think I wanted female friends at the time, based on all the negative experiences I had with my mother and sister.

I think alot of schools don't want to discipline girls like they do boys. In more than one school, I saw girls get away with all sorts of things with no consequences(including my sister punching out a kid in front of a teacher and getting no discipline at all, while I did the same thing and had to serve after school detention), while boys get the book thrown at them for the slightest indiscretion. It's just so unfair.

I played ice hockey in boys' leagues as the only girl for 8 years. I didn't get a single penalty in those 8 years (probably around 100+ games) even though I know I did things wrong. I tripped, hooked, etc. I'm 95% certain the refs let it go every time because I was "the girl". And likewise if a guy hit me even slightly more hard than normal he got a penalty for roughing, or unsportsmanlike behavior, etc. When that happened he could expect to have to drop the gloves later in the game with our "enforcer" that considered it his job to defend me and the goalie.

On the flip side, girls at my school couldn't wear shorts shorter than the top of their knees and if we did we were sent home to change, but there were many gay boys that wore short shorts all the way up to their crotch that never got in trouble. My sister once almost caused a racial riot because of this. She complained to the principal about a black gay guy at our junior high that did this and the other students considered it a racial threat.

In my experience though it depended on the teacher doing the disciplining.


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10 Dec 2008, 2:15 am

If you include a nasty look next time she makes you do that, she'll get the hint.

Abrupting saying "GAH!" in frustration at her the following time could also stop her behavior, but looks worse on you (though I'm not one to care what people think of me).



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10 Dec 2008, 4:21 am

Ugh, I hate people like that, but whatever you do, don't retaliate otherwise YOU will get in trouble. Believe me, I spent so much time out of class for getting riled up by bullies to the point where I would shout something rude! Now I am in my 20s and have no qualifications... sigh. The bully will always win.


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10 Dec 2008, 5:49 am

If this is about college, I can't imagine authoritative retaliation unless you do something that would be considered... a threat or otherwise disruptive. She is disrupting the OP, and this situation must be resolved one way or another.

If this is about high school (unlikely, OP is 21), then the teacher punishing the OP may happen, though even if you get sent to ISS or the principal or something - so what? You made your point clear to the girl, right?



countzarroff
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16 Dec 2008, 3:18 am

Tell her to shut up. Girls never have any sympathy for special ed kids. Heres an important lesson, those preppy girls seem really powerful because they never have to speak one-on-one to anybody, their friends and their boyfriends are always around them to make them look powerful. Tell her right to her face that she doesn't have to like it, but you have aspergers and she can either learn to deal with it or drop out of the class because you aren't changing s#$% for her.

Yeah it's harsh, but unfortunatley, bluntness is the only thing that works against people like that. Don't suck up, don't be polite, just tell her bluntly. As long as you don't do or say anything that will get you into trouble, be blunt and serious and keep a straight face. They LOVE to see you melt down.



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17 Dec 2008, 4:57 pm

countzarroff wrote:
Tell her to shut up. Girls never have any sympathy for special ed kids. Heres an important lesson, those preppy girls seem really powerful because they never have to speak one-on-one to anybody, their friends and their boyfriends are always around them to make them look powerful. Tell her right to her face that she doesn't have to like it, but you have aspergers and she can either learn to deal with it or drop out of the class because you aren't changing s#$% for her.

Yeah it's harsh, but unfortunatley, bluntness is the only thing that works against people like that. Don't suck up, don't be polite, just tell her bluntly. As long as you don't do or say anything that will get you into trouble, be blunt and serious and keep a straight face. They LOVE to see you melt down.


I once told one of my tormentors in no uncertain terms to leave me alone and that I wanted nothing to do with her, it didn't work.


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17 Dec 2008, 6:57 pm

The girls in my school were always the ones that were nicer/sympathetic to me... it was always other boys in school that tormented me, although like in all the other scenarios posted, I was still the one singled out for punishment, as in a case where I got multiple detentions for kicking another guy barefoot (meaning no actual harm done) in the gymnasium locker room, while another guy got away scot-free after hitting me in the back of the head with a textbook...



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17 Dec 2008, 7:00 pm

The girls in my school were always the ones that were nicer/sympathetic to me... it was always other boys in school that tormented me, although like in all the other scenarios posted, I was still the one singled out for punishment, as in a case where I got multiple detentions for kicking another guy barefoot (meaning no actual harm done) in the gymnasium locker room, while another guy got away scot-free after hitting me in the back of the head with a textbook...

As for college, the male:female ratio is 4:1, dominated by the nerd population, so the few women that are around tend to not be that bitchy...



orngjce223
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17 Dec 2008, 11:14 pm

ToadOfSteel wrote:
The girls in my school were always the ones that were nicer/sympathetic to me... it was always other boys in school that tormented me, although like in all the other scenarios posted, I was still the one singled out for punishment, as in a case where I got multiple detentions for kicking another guy barefoot (meaning no actual harm done) in the gymnasium locker room, while another guy got away scot-free after hitting me in the back of the head with a textbook...

As for college, the male:female ratio is 4:1, dominated by the nerd population, so the few women that are around tend to not be that bitchy...


...the trouble is for the gals who AREN'T interested.

You should pretended to pass out when hit in the back of the head with a textbook. Then they'll be forced to admit that you weren't the one doing the damage, and you get examined to make sure that nothing got permanently broken. :lol:


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