Do You Think You Wear a Mask?

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I've been doing some study on body language as it relates to the "masks" NTs wear. The mask would be the attitude they project in social interaction that covers over their true persona or feelings.

But what about aspies? Do you think you wear a mask? If so, how and when? If not, why do you think you don't?

my two cents: I don't seem to. I'm really adroit at projecting correct NT body language and interpreting the same. But I'm still just expressing my true self in a way others can understand better. I don't change from work persona to leisure persona to lover persona. It causes a lot of problems, because people expect me to. Women think I'm holding back when I'm the same at night as in the day. It's almost as if I lack a dimension compared to NT complexity.

But perhaps that's only me. Give over your ideas!

I'm really quite malleable. I change depending on my mood and who I'm with. With my family, I'm a lot more likely to show when I'm in a bad mood or when I'm happy. When I'm out and about, I give off a cool and disinterested image. When I'm with acquaintences, I'm a bit more open.

I dont wear a mask, but my mannerisms change as i am amused to change them according to the situation.

I certainly feel like I wear different masks to different people, I've been doing it for several years now. It is a way of avoiding conflict with other people (especially my family).

I think I know what you mean GD. I was really shocked when I was working at the same place as my wife (NT). I couldn't understand why she changed so drastically between Mrs Eyeenteepee at home to Ms Office Professional at work. And again, there were totally different personas applied to family occasions and yet another for other social occasions.

It really freaked me out at first, but it doesn't bother me so much anymore.

Me, I'm just the same lackadaisical person in all climes and times. Sure, I have moods. But I'm the same person with my boss as with my family and friends.

I don't know I always wonder this. Because sometimes I try to and it doesn't actually happen, everyone sees through it. Other times I have no idea if it's worked or not. So when I do try and 'mask' myself I have no idea if the 'mask' stays there or evaporates. I mean I usually act as an 'all-happy, no problems' kind of person around friends mums and I avoid talking to my parents about anything. So I do deliberately hold things back from people, but that doesn't mean I don't show that I am holding something back - like people will know that I'm upset and I won't hide that fact, I just won't share why I am.

Like other people have already said, I'm the same person outwardly no matter where I am or who I'm around. The only mask I would say I do wear is the autistically-imposed one - the one that keeps me from using my social skills the way I'd like and showing my real inner personality. It's sort of a feeling of being muzzled. I'm not purposely wearing this mask, I'd love to be able to get out from under it. Stimulants help somewhat - I'm guessing it's because they give me the energy to fight my way past that outer mask, but for the most part I'm stuck behind it.

I like that description, one of being muzzled. That describes very succinctly how I am and would really help an NT understand better, especially the "just try harder" brigade.

Sadly, NTs rarely understand. But I can see where they're coming from - something like this is so far outside the realm of anything they've experienced themselves. It probably does sound pretty crazy to them. At this point (at least in my own experience) it seems that the best I can hope for is to find people who at least believe me when I tell them what's going on, people who accept it as fact even though they can't comprehend it. Even people like that are pretty rare though. You know how it is - "If you can't see it or feel it yourself, then it must not exist."

Ever since I was bullied at school, I've grown into this natural habit of hiding every fault or whatever I can. That's why people think I'm normal enough, when really, I'm just too scared to express myself properly now.

I suppose you're right. See how long it took people to accept the world was round. Maybe it'll help me understand myself if not others!

Definitely... sometimes it seems like I've put so much effort into wearing an NT 'mask' that I'm not sure I know who I am anymore

That's the same with me, actually.

Everyone wears a mask whether its conscious or unconscious.

When I got hit in the face, my mask was knocked unconcious.

Oh I definitely wear one. It's rare for me to be with someone I feel I can show my true self too.