Dwight's does an mental map check: Qui audet adipiscitur

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Your feelings on "Who dares wins".
Poll ended at 25 Dec 2008, 4:19 pm
THAT WAY LIES MADNESS!! ! 14%  14%  [ 2 ]
Interesting idea but I'd rather claw my own eyes out. 7%  7%  [ 1 ]
Not my natural instinct but I've learned to do this. 36%  36%  [ 5 ]
Yeah, I do that to "typical" levels. 14%  14%  [ 2 ]
I was BORN risking. 14%  14%  [ 2 ]
It varies, I'll explain in a post 14%  14%  [ 2 ]
Total votes : 14

DwightF
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18 Dec 2008, 4:19 pm

This is the motto for the British SAS (and some other military units after it). English translation is "Who dares wins".

“Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.” -TS Elliott

Am I right in assuming that this is anti-thematic to how [most] autistics' approach life, if not just thinking about it sending them into panic? Risking great, pushing forward against 'dangerous' uncertainty? I definitely want to hear from those that have overcome this or are the exception to the supposed rule.


Discuss....


EDIT: ACK!! ! The forum ate the 6th option. :( "It varies, I'll explain in a post".


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pluto
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18 Dec 2008, 6:40 pm

As someone who only discovered the existence of Asperger's at the age of 46,I've had
different experiences 'before' and 'after' said discovery.
Before I became self aware that many of my traits were related to autism,I occasionally surprised myself by taking paths that led to uncertainty.There was never any dramatic impulses like wanting to travel round the world or anything like that,it was more modest
challenges such as pro-actively changing jobs in order to gain wider experience or making efforts to initiate friendships with people that in hindsight were 'out of my league'.
There did come a point when I realised I was out of my depth and a more appropriate saying was "Be careful what you wish for,you might just get it"
Since discovering by accident a link to AS and realising,after months of research,that I fitted the profile I now tend to lower my sights and try to ensure that I build any dreams on solid
ground and not shifting sand as I did in the past,to my detriment and indeed to others that
I may have deluded by raising false expectations.
Nowadays when I see the motto "Who Dares Wins" it's not the SAS that comes to mind but
Del Boy in 'Only Fools And Horses'. :) Of course,to end on a positive note Del Boy actually
achieved his dreams and lived happily in the end.


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ValMikeSmith
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18 Dec 2008, 7:00 pm

Logical.

Only gamblers win the jackpots.
Many who risk rejection get dates.
Only those who do something get something done.
Only those who are going somewhere eventually get somewhere.



MrMark
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18 Dec 2008, 8:41 pm

DwightF wrote:
EDIT: ACK!! ! The forum ate the 6th option. :( "It varies, I'll explain in a post".

A common mistake. You have to remember to click "Add Option" after you type that last option, not go directly to the submit button. :)


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18 Dec 2008, 10:17 pm

who does it without being caught, wins...;)

There's a Scots clan out there who's Latin motto is 'Why not?'...I like that...;)



prillix
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19 Dec 2008, 3:00 am

DwightF wrote:
Am I right in assuming that this is anti-thematic to how [most] autistics' approach life, if not just thinking about it sending them into panic? Risking great, pushing forward against 'dangerous' uncertainty? I definitely want to hear from those that have overcome this or are the exception to the supposed rule.



Well i DID sell everything i have and move 3000km away to a place i've never been, but on the other hand i haven't been diagnosed so Who Knows! :P



AngelUndercover
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19 Dec 2008, 5:41 am

I'll take risks and push into uncertain territory if it's to get something I really care about. Only if it's worth it. I won't do it just for the sake of doing it.

I'm not sure which poll answer that counts as.


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19 Dec 2008, 7:06 am

I had a thing going for decades where I'd sink everything I had back into the cosmic balance for another bet.

Never won... eventually, I came up with a better theory and now, while I still don't own anything, I take a lot less risks.



ephemerella
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19 Dec 2008, 7:14 am

Everything I do is a risk. I aggressively push out in unknown or risky territory all the time, for things that I passionately want. Good way to develop a stress disorder. Not a true "gambler" tho.



AnnaLemma
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19 Dec 2008, 9:04 am

I have learned that others (both NT and AS) consider some things I regularly do quite naturally to be "risky" and think me brave for doing them. I realize the risks, but put them in perspective, so don't consider these activities risky. However, many quite ordinary things I have to do cause me enormous amount of stress, which I conceal with varying degrees of success. These are things most folks would consider me a big baby for stressing about. I guess personal fears determine how you evaluate other people's behavior.


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DwightF
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19 Dec 2008, 12:16 pm

MrMark wrote:
DwightF wrote:
EDIT: ACK!! ! The forum ate the 6th option. :( "It varies, I'll explain in a post".

A common mistake. You have to remember to click "Add Option" after you type that last option, not go directly to the submit button. :)

I suspected as much. Lesson learned and thanks for fixing it. *thumbs up*
AngelUndercover wrote:
I'll take risks and push into uncertain territory if it's to get something I really care about. Only if it's worth it. I won't do it just for the sake of doing it.

I'm not sure which poll answer that counts as.

I think that counts as a "typical". Or at least "typical" of the ideal of bravery. With "Born risking" I was thinking more like problem gambler, the drive to risk is compulsive.

@AnnaLemma

That is the type of response I had in mind adding the category "It varies". Because my son balances on things and makes leaps to an extent that scares the crap out of visitors that are new to it. A few things have scared the crap out of me, I raised the light in the foyer to keep him from standing on the top of the stair railing and leaning out and grabbing onto the fixture (overtop of a tile floor). But I'm not sure how much he considers it "risk" and pushing boundaries, because he's really good at it. Likewise at a school he went to a prior student was very, very good at climbing. Primate-like really. His big stim at home was hanging by his arms from a pipe in the basement for hours. An aid took him (he would have been 6, maybe 7 at the time) to a climbing wall place one weekend and he climbed right up the climbing wall and then proceeded to casually go hand-over-hand across the bottom of the metal rafters. The people the running the place were freaking out but the aid told them to calm down and just wait for him to get bored and come back down.

On the otherhand my son has a tough time going up a climbing wall all the way, he's not done it yet (only been a few times), even though he's capable and truth is it's way safer than home because of the tether rope. *shrug*

Do you think you still push hard in those "ordinary" situations, relative to the stress that it incurs? To the point that you find yourself breaking new ground in how far you can go?


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Last edited by DwightF on 19 Dec 2008, 3:11 pm, edited 1 time in total.

AnnaLemma
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19 Dec 2008, 3:09 pm

DwightF wrote:

Do you think you still push hard in those "ordinary" situations, relative to the stress that it incurs? To the point that you find yourself breaking new ground in how far you can go?


Most of the time I do. A very few times I wimp out, but the more I do the grindingly stressful stuff, the more I can convince myself to do them again. A sort of home-grown cbt, maybe. For example, I can give a speech in front of a huge audience, because I genuinely don't care what they think about me and I have a feeling of control over the situation (however illusory this may be). On the other hand, I stress out about being an audience member in a really big theater. Less control. What if I have to use the restroom and there's a really long line? What if I get nauseous and can't get to the restroom in time? What if we get in a big traffic jam? This is the stuff that makes me try to convince myself not to go. These bad things have never happened! And if I make myself go through with it, I'm almost always glad.

I also hike and run alone into the wild to record my videos. Yes, I meet critters that could eat me. So far they have never been threatening. I'm prepared if they ever are. But I'm pretty freaked at the wacko traffic on the freeways. People do die there daily. But sometimes I take them to get to the trailhead!


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20 Dec 2008, 7:37 am

Heh, I like that: "my natural instinct"

I am naturally risk-seeking, I don't care much for the consequences, but learnt to keep it in satisfying boundaries.

But when it comes down, I act before I catch up with myself. I doubt that this will ever change.


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