Why was this considered rude suddenly???

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Yes, this is another "NTs thought I was being rude but why" threads, it aint long though, so help me out here.

When we where at the dinner table, I said to my mum that a teacher at my school was crap and she didn't tell me off for it, she listened and went OK, but when we where at the school waiting to see the teacher, I mentioned it again (not randomly, we were talking about the teacher) and suddenly my mum got all upset at me coz of it! BTW, the teacher was in another room talking to other people so she couldnt hear our conversation.

Can anyone explain this? My mum refused to.

It's more appropriate to say those things at home and not in public. In the school, any passerby could have heard you and ran and told that teacher. Even then, it wouldn't even look right if you were to say it at the mall, church, or anywhere else that people outside your family gather. Your mom probably would have even got upset if you said it at home when guests were around.

Yeah, the only thing that changed was the setting. Don't say things about someone around people that know that person, just in case they don't have the same opinion as you. If everyone in the room were saying the same thing about the person as you said in the school it would have been more appropriate but otherwise no.

Not even after you got home?

My first guess was because you were at school. Proximity created danger of accidentally being overheard, which could create problems. She might have been concerned that you were going to blurt it out when the teacher was in the room? Also it can represent you coming into a meeting with a non-constructive attitude, was your mom at the school in regards with this "crap" teacher?

As well your mom may not have agreed with you the first time but she was doing sympathetic listening, which basically means "whatever their feelings are they are valid, even if you don't agree with them just nod and keep your mouth shut". The idea is that the talker is just blowing off steam, relieving stress. They aren't expected to be saying objective facts, they are expected to be making highly subjective feeling based statements so you more-or-less get a free pass on hyperbole and "rude" comments. The accuracy isn't needed because this isn't about solving problems, the listener isn't suppose to be trying to figure out concrete solutions. This is culturally more linked with women, both talking that way and expecting the sympathetic listening. It is sometimes refereed to as a "bitching session".

What's accepted inside that "bitching session" may not be outside. You are expected to have dumped all that emotion out in the session, purged it out of yourself. Think of it as a little like verbal "stim".

Thanks for that, I am understanding better now

FYI, in case it wasn't clear, "bitching session" or "b***h session" is the crass term and men are more accepting of that name than women. So don't be using that around your mom, any ERA members, or such.

LOL I know

its true what the others have said, i do it all the time, and everytime i do, my mum tells me to "shh!" and my dad says "you've got no diplomacy girl!"
so thats what it is, you have no diplomacy! (i didnt mean for that to sound horrible lol. sorry!)