Has anyone else ever experienced this?

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FlamingYouth
Pileated woodpecker
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Joined: 30 Jan 2009
Age: 29
Gender: Male
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01 Feb 2009, 3:25 pm

I used to be hyper-aroused all the time, as is typical for people on the spectrum. I used to be really afraid of making mistakes, I always felt like I had to be perfect. When I made mistakes, peopel always made me feel like I was the only person that ever screwed up. But at the same time, whenever anybody complimented me in anyway, I used to love it. Getting any sort of compliment would put me on a high that would last for a day or 2. And if other people made mistakes, I used to get really angry, sometimes I would develop grudges against people that lasted for a long time over simple things.

But now, I don't react as much as I used to. I don't get excited the way I used to, I don't get depressed the way I used to, I don't get angry or shocked the way I used to, I don't feel joy the way I used to. I guess it's good not to get depressed or angry easily, but all of this makes me feel less human. Plus, my intense fear of failure used to motivate me, now I find it harder to find motivation for anything.

Does anybody else understand what I'm saying? is this normal for people on the spectrum?



nothingunusual
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Joined: 22 May 2008
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01 Feb 2009, 3:40 pm

I think perfectionism, high standards for yourself and for others is supposed to be common among AS people.

I've always been like that. Except I don't take compliments very well, because I never feel I've done well enough to deserve them.


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