First Date Fumbles

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These MSN "Lifestyle" articles are usually mindless, annoying drivel, but I thought this one was good.

First date fumbles: why guys never make it to the second date.
http://lifestyle.msn.com/relationships/ ... d=16947040

1. Going on a rant about a former significant other.
2. Divulging too much personal information that’s not flattering. (No therapy session.)
3. Making the date feel like a job interview (even though it is).
4. Having too much attitude. (Go easy on the special interest.)
5. Admiring other women.
6. Complaining about the venue (restaurant).
7. Arguing with your date (politics).
8. Eating your date’s dessert. (maybe she's just a slow eater.)
9. Not walking her to safety at the end of the date.
(I don't leave anyone like that. If I drop off my child's friend, I want to see that an adult is home. If I drop off my teenager's friend, I want to see that he has a key. If I drop off an adult friend at her car, I want to see it move before I abandon her in a dark parking lot.)
10. Saying “I’ll be in touch” after the date goes badly. (Transparent lies are insulting.)

Did ja ever do any of this stuff, or has anyone done it to you?

Last edited by Tahitiii on 05 Feb 2009, 3:55 pm, edited 1 time in total.

It's been so long since I've been on a first date (almost 30 years), that I don't remember. (It must not have gone too badly, since we were together for the better part of two years.)

I've never even been on a date, so I wouldn't know, LOL.

I quite like the MSN Lifestyle articles.

I do agree with you, Tahitii! Some of the deeds are crazy.

There was one time when I was seventeen that I thought I was on a date, but in retrospect I'm not so sure. But if it was a first date, it was disastrous and I learned a lot from the experience. The following are things I'll try to avoid happening again:

1. Not having a plan B in case your plan A fails (for example, if the festival hasn't really started or the restaurant happens to be closed)
2. Trying a restaurant you haven't already been to (it could be - and in my case it was - crap)
3. Being too intrusive in conversation (asking strong personal questions)
4. Long, awkward moments of silence (silence can be OK, but there wasn't enough of an understanding for it not to be awkward and unpleasant)

I was still very much interested and called to arrange something else, but she made an excuse and told me not to call her again.

I've never really been on a date either.. *shrug* I just hang out with someone I like and get to know them I don't expect any special treatment and I don't pretend to be someone else or hide unflattering things. I want someone to get to know ME

So wait, you got married without ever being on a date?

I did, the first time around. (The marriage was brief and a disaster, but for other reasons.) We just hung out and it evolved from there. It was a kind of innocence. By the time we actually went out, we had already been a couple for a while, so it wasn't like a "first date."

Dating is so unnatural. It's the only game in town and people today can't imagine any other way, but think back... I doubt that anyone even heard of it until the past century or so. (Then again, marriages were probably arranged through most of history anyway.)

I agree with this.

Dating is a bizarre practice...

Heh, I went on a date with someone, and she did a few of these things: talking about an ex, disclosing all the chaos going on in her life, etc. I did bring up politics and religion, though.