Loving Someone with Asperger’s Syndrome
The following article is written by Cindy Ariel (PhD), author of Loving Someone with Asperger’s Syndrome.
I wrote Loving Someone with Asperger’s Syndrome for several compelling reasons. Over the years I’ve had the opportunity to work with many people with AS and their partners either as individuals or couples and I have seen the struggles from both sides.
As I looked around for guidance, in the form of books and/or research to help me to help them, I found a serious dearth of information focused on these couples. Much of the writing seems almost to take one side or the other as if we are talking about two different teams or sometimes even enemies rather than two people who love each other and are trying everything they can to connect, yet coming up short.
I try to come at these relationships with a balanced view, looking at responsibility on both sides and suggesting understanding toward and compromise from both partners. It can be very difficult to understand the roles and responsibilities of both partners when it often appears that only one is to blame. Taking a serious hard look at ourselves in relation to another can be exceedingly difficult, but I attempt to help couples gain balance and move closer to each other in this regard.
While it’s true that having Asperger’s syndrome versus not having it result in two people with different ways of thinking and even of being, we do not have to be at such intense odds with each other. Both partners in any couple need to feel heard and both need to listen to the other with an open heart, if not an open mind.
If we listen to each other with our hearts, and use our heads to make important decisions we should be able to come up with a loving relationship that feels mutually satisfying and leads to a happy union. Loving Someone with Asperger’s Syndrome: Understanding and Connecting with Your Partner was written to help partners in which one person has AS and one doesn’t along their journey to a fulfilling life together.
You can order Loving Someone with Asperger’s Syndrome on Amazon.
Editorial disclosure: While this column is not sponsored or paid for in any way, a separate ad for this book has been placed on Wrong Planet by the author.