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Manders
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: Jul 17, 2008
Age: 18
Posts: 69
Location: The Emerald Bar
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 Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 1:50 am Post subject: I'm not that girl... again. |
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Just another rant from me.
I always fall for people who aren't the least bit interested. The current problem is a friend of mine. It started off at work, when he got hired on. We became quick friends, and started hanging out outside the restaurant. We've spent a lot of time together over the past months... and it's developed into something more for me. He's got a thing for somebody else now, which I have to hear about on a daily basis. It's killing me. I actually thought I was coping a little better, until tonight. 
I learned my lesson about being honest last year, when something similar happened with a different person and I let the secret out. Needless to say, it just made things awkward. Why is it always like this? Why can't I be attracted to someone who finds interest in me? |
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KingChaosNinja
Velociraptor
Joined: Apr 26, 2005
Age: 22
Posts: 489
Location: Pittsburgh
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| Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 1:59 am Post subject: |
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Yeah, I think we've all been there before. The thing is to try and make them interested. If you're already friends with them, just keep on doing what you're doing, but maybe show a little extra cleavage or something when you're talking to them. I know it sounds perverted but it helps. You actually have to flirt with people to get them interested. It's tricky,
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"No matter how many instances of white swans we see, we must never assume that all swans are white." ~Sir Karl Popper
*I picked this username 4 years ago when I was in high school. Don't hold it against me. |
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tomamil
What the #$*!?
Joined: May 14, 2007
Posts: 1357
Location: currently Paris, France, but originally Asteroid B612
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| Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 2:44 am Post subject: |
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| KingChaosNinja wrote: | | Yeah, I think we've all been there before. You actually have to flirt with people to get them interested. It's tricky, |
not all. i had never been attracted to anyone. but yes, the key is to flirt.
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Timeo hominem unius libri, I fear the man of one book, St. Thomas Aquinas. |
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ToadOfSteel
Extremist Moderate
Joined: Sep 24, 2007
Age: 20
Posts: 2832
Location: New Jersey
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| Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 2:50 am Post subject: |
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| KingChaosNinja wrote: | | Yeah, I think we've all been there before. The thing is to try and make them interested. If you're already friends with them, just keep on doing what you're doing, but maybe show a little extra cleavage or something when you're talking to them. I know it sounds perverted but it helps. You actually have to flirt with people to get them interested. It's tricky, |
Yeah, he's got a point here. We men get too confused about whether or not a woman likes us... |
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Manders
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: Jul 17, 2008
Age: 18
Posts: 69
Location: The Emerald Bar
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| Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 2:54 am Post subject: |
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I do flirt, just not to the extreme. I can't help but get all giggly and act silly around him, it just happens - which I'm sure makes my liking him obvious, as I don't usually act in such a manner.
I'm just not the type to really put myself out there. I don't have the guts. |
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ToadOfSteel
Extremist Moderate
Joined: Sep 24, 2007
Age: 20
Posts: 2832
Location: New Jersey
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| Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 2:59 am Post subject: |
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| Manders wrote: | I do flirt, just not to the extreme. I can't help but get all giggly and act silly around him, it just happens - which I'm sure makes my liking him obvious, as I don't usually act in such a manner.
I'm just not the type to really put myself out there. I don't have the guts. |
Well at least women like you give men like me some hope... especially considering that I'm the type of guy that waits a white after meeting a woman before even becoming attracted... |
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nekowafer
Deinonychus
Joined: Jun 20, 2008
Age: 23
Posts: 351
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| Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 3:57 am Post subject: |
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I know exactly how you feel.. I've also had the guys I've gotten sort of involved with, but not actually TECHNICALLY dating who told me they "couldn't date anyone" and weren't even close to ready and blah blah.. two of them went on to ask the next girl they liked to marry them. Well, two that I know of anyway. -_- And they just freaking love telling me about it. Ugh.
You will find that guy who will understand you and like you and sweep you off your feet.. but it will take lots of heartbreaks and learning experiences first. I might have found mine, but honestly, I don't know yet. For all I know he's going to leave me tomorrow for his best friend and I'll be screwed again.
Just be friendly, and be yourself.. if they can't see in you what you are then they're not worth your time, you know?
Sorry if I sound a little cliche there but it's true. |
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crackedpleasures
Phoenix
Joined: Oct 14, 2007
Posts: 1777
Location: In between the bright lights and the far unlit unknown, CZ
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| Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 4:50 am Post subject: |
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I know it is slightly offtopic, but relationships on the workfloor are a bit ... well, not risky necessarily, but I personally would avoid it. I have been there once when I was attracted to a female supervisor of mine. In the end it is a troubleful situation: if she says NO you still have to work together and act professionally as if nothing happened, if she YES then others could complain about conflict of interests.
Of course it can work, I even had a colleague once who married her co-worker. But I personally would stray away from it, because it often leads to difficult situations regardless if he/she answers your calls or not. You still need to work together in a colleague-esque style, which becomes quite difficult if you either are a couple or if an attempt to become one has not worked out.
Also, Nekowafer is right. If he cannot take you for who you are, then he is not the ideal person for you anyway. So be yourself, it sounds cliche but it is true. You don't want to play masquerade all the time just to keep someone attached to someone who isn't even the real you?
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You did it again, yes, you in the mirror
You put your faith in a cruel world...
All my dead friends come to haunt, harm and hinder
Never letting go, here to drag me down to hell
(London After Midnight) |
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BallisticMystic
Raven
Joined: Jul 01, 2008
Age: 47
Posts: 106
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| Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 6:27 am Post subject: |
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The reason there's an unwritten rule about dating in the workplace is because if it goes south it makes every day at work a drama fest and usually means getting a different job.
If you've already been intimate and he has gone elsewhere then let it go. Trying too hard or groveling to get him back will only remove what dignity you have in the situation and you'll be sorry you stooped to that level.
Personally, if I were the guy in that situation and you started hanging your tits in my face I'd see it as an act of desperation. If your tits were too nice to ignore you might get a quick bang out of me but I'd come back to my senses about the time I was putting my clothes back on to rush out of there.
You don't need to go there, let it go and find something better 
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Circumstance Rules!
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Brook-lynn20
Sea Gull
Joined: Aug 18, 2008
Posts: 226
Location: Hoosierhickville
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| Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 7:36 am Post subject: |
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| You know, when I was interested in someone, they were never interested back, at least at the same time. I've been through this so much I quit. There was a guy I liked a lot more than other other guy I've ever liked. People even said he liked me back? He doesn't think of me that way. That had really crushed me. This past year or so I want nothing to do with love and I'm just fine with how things are as a single person. This is the only time in my life I've been asked out. And both guys were guys I use to like but got over. Then I got teased about that. They're playing around, but I loathe it because I'm kinda...embarrassed by the whole thing. My family just keeps telling me I'll find someone and I will get married, what my former dream use to be. But I have no intentions on marriage anymore. I actually want to be single. |
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ImTheGuyThatDidThat
`
Joined: May 21, 2008
Posts: 6666
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| Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 4:05 pm Post subject: |
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| ToadOfSteel wrote: | | KingChaosNinja wrote: | | Yeah, I think we've all been there before. The thing is to try and make them interested. If you're already friends with them, just keep on doing what you're doing, but maybe show a little extra cleavage or something when you're talking to them. I know it sounds perverted but it helps. You actually have to flirt with people to get them interested. It's tricky, |
Yeah, he's got a point here. We men get too confused about whether or not a woman likes us... |
Thats true, i can be a really dumb when it comes to picking up on those
signals, and have been told this also by girls a couple of times, and if i
should happen to pick up on something that i think maybe is "something",
i usually end up thinking; "its probably me misunderstanding something"
One time i said nicely goodnight to a girl and went home, the next day she
pretty much told me "damn, you`re weird, or gay"  she had apparantly
tried to get something to happen and then i left. Utterly clueless sometimes,
she suggested watching tv in bed, i thought she was tired and said bye-bye,
didn`t want to bother her because i liked her alot.. doh...DOH! |
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Funaho
Deinonychus
Joined: Dec 31, 2005
Age: 35
Posts: 314
Location: Detroit, Michigan
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| Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 4:25 pm Post subject: |
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| ImTheGuyThatDidThat wrote: | Thats true, i can be a really dumb when it comes to picking up on those
signals, and have been told this also by girls a couple of times, and if i
should happen to pick up on something that i think maybe is "something",
i usually end up thinking; "its probably me misunderstanding something"
One time i said nicely goodnight to a girl and went home, the next day she
pretty much told me "damn, you`re weird, or gay" she had apparantly
tried to get something to happen and then i left. Utterly clueless sometimes,
she suggested watching tv in bed, i thought she was tired and said bye-bye,
didn`t want to bother her because i liked her alot.. doh...DOH! |
I'm still kicking myself for declining an offer from a friend/coworker who (somewhat drunkenly) IMed me one night and told me I should "come sleep next to her." Ugh.
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Quantum Mechanics -- the dreams stuff is made of |
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ImTheGuyThatDidThat
`
Joined: May 21, 2008
Posts: 6666
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| Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 4:48 pm Post subject: |
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^
Please man, dont mention kicking oneself 
it really sucks to figure it out way way to late..
i kicked myself for a long time over that one.
I liked her and really respected her, and therefor
i wasn`t "forward" enough i guess, would`t want
to do anything to mess anything up...yeah 
that didnt work out to well |
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KenM
Phoenix
Joined: Oct 16, 2005
Age: 40
Posts: 638
Location: Mass. USA
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| Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 8:08 pm Post subject: |
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Manders, sorry you are having trouble with finding someone. I know how you feel it sucks.
Interesting thread title, Wicked good. LOL
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There is good and there is evil, and evil must be punished. Even in the face of armageeddon I shall not compromise in this.
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Manders
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: Jul 17, 2008
Age: 18
Posts: 69
Location: The Emerald Bar
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| Posted: Fri Aug 29, 2008 2:39 am Post subject: |
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Thanks for the replies, everyone. I'm sure this will pass... I just can't help but feel a little down because of it.
| KenM wrote: | | Interesting thread title, Wicked good. LOL |
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