| Author |
Message |
Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Forced into unsuitable work |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 25 Mar 2023, 10:51 am
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Replies: 11
Views: 270
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| I never did get paid for my MOST suitable work. Without a business partner, I had to pay to demonstrate my abilities. Some of the jobs were not a good fit, but the disappointment fell on both sides. However, I got quite good at not needing much money. |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Aspiedar: can you tell if someone is autistic? |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 25 Mar 2023, 4:51 am
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Replies: 24
Views: 704
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| I was on a techie BBS, and one of the other guys was a successful shop owner and family man. I wrote to him that I thought he was a fellow aspie. He'd never thought of anything like that himself, but saw right away that I was right. I'm pretty sure that a friend of mine divorced an aspie, and carrie... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Understand the subtle |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 18 Mar 2023, 5:38 pm
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Replies: 12
Views: 355
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| In the first clip, the man is somewhat the "straight man," and his subdued reactions are intended to not offend the flaming Dunning-Kruger case he is dealing with, although he must be struggling to stay polite. In the second, the "acting lesson" is rather patronizing, more suitab... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Greta Thunberg |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 11 Mar 2023, 4:44 pm
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Replies: 92
Views: 2,747
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| Sometimes, if we don't know what is going on, it is essential to be able to pick up clues from people. If everyone starts running, it is usually a good idea to run with them. Following the herd is also the best option if there just is not enough time to think about what is best. However, if there is... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: What is autism like? |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 09 Mar 2023, 5:36 pm
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Replies: 51
Views: 2,111
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| I could describe my experience, but not by comparison to other things. I browsed disorders for over a decade without finding another match. |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Let's be more silly? |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 08 Mar 2023, 2:02 pm
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Replies: 22
Views: 585
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| ^^ I get some of that, too. Because I'm a bit eccentric, and not in a position to gossip, people are prone to sharing things about themselves they seldom talk about. Even my physiotherapist would discuss her life plans. None of it seemed weird compared to what I was dealing with. The odd bit is that... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Let's be more silly? |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 08 Mar 2023, 1:45 pm
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Replies: 22
Views: 585
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| In early reviews, Monty Python was called "madcap" "offensive" and various other things, but what made them stand out was their own test for what to present. "Is it silly?" There had been a drought. John Cleese says that the most hysterical laughter he ever heard was ov... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Let's be more silly? |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 08 Mar 2023, 12:26 pm
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Replies: 22
Views: 585
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| ^^ Exactly! Sometimes, if people think I'm odd, I'll exaggerate it and laugh with them. It really establishes common understanding. Another time, I was scrutineering in a polling station for the losing party, so I was with mostly mildly hostile strangers. Then, I allowed a ballot that had actually b... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Let's be more silly? |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 08 Mar 2023, 10:35 am
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Replies: 22
Views: 585
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| Put on a costume for a costume party. Ordinarily, silliness should be comic relief, not a chronic condition. Those team building exercises just alienate me. They are supposed to build on a whole constellation of earlier experiences I lack. They often assume familiarity with sports or TV, and don't r... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Let's be more silly? |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 08 Mar 2023, 5:19 am
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Replies: 22
Views: 585
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| Silly does not work for everyone, but as long as it leads to a shared laugh, I'm in favour. I wouldn't wear silly clothing on normal occasions, but I treasure times like when I was in a meeting where the chairperson had briefly lost control to two independent conversations. We happened to be meeting... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: "I'm fine" |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 07 Mar 2023, 7:10 am
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Replies: 16
Views: 564
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| At one support group I attended, "fine" was an acronym for "Effed up, Insecure, Neurotic, & Empty" or some such, so it could be said honestly without alarming people. Lots of people use it, although the percentage of Aspies may be even higher. I think it is generally understo... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Monks/monasticism . |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 07 Mar 2023, 6:59 am
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Replies: 41
Views: 2,230
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| I did it for several years, watching a fast-growing organization that wanted to spread peace with free meditation lessons turn into a stagnant religion. There was a lot more work than contemplation, and not enough sleep to stay alert for meditation. Presumably, the alert meditators didn't need as mu... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Neighbour noise |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 01 Mar 2023, 2:10 pm
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Replies: 18
Views: 1,350
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| Things can easily seem deliberate when you are tired and easily triggered. In China, they tell the story of a farmer who went out to cultivate his garden, and couldn't find his hoe. As he was searching, he saw the neighbour boy sneaking by like a thief. Then, he found the hoe, and saw the neighbour ... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Starting a project and needing help |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 01 Mar 2023, 6:32 am
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Replies: 10
Views: 353
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| ^^ Yes, arbitrator. A professional who deals with disagreements if the parties are not crazy enough about it to sue. There are some talented amateurs, too. Aye, Dunning-Kruger is an ever-present hazard. If you want to play with someone who isn't talented enough to judge their own talent, you have to... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Starting a project and needing help |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 01 Mar 2023, 6:03 am
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Replies: 10
Views: 353
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| ^^ Perhaps an arbitrator? Certainly not Yoko Ono. Or, to do it yourselves, go through the lists of what you find preferable and look for points where three or two agree. You may have to put the fun of playing together ahead of playing at your very best. Find the lowest common denominator - maybe jus... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Starting a project and needing help |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 27 Feb 2023, 11:32 pm
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Replies: 10
Views: 353
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| Perhaps you can create a virtual manager. Have meetings, as if a manager was calling them, and ask each other what an organized manager would do. Draw on your observations of others in the business. Make "to-do" lists. Vote on what "BigBoss" or whatever pet name you like would de... |
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