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 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Should I Apologize?

 Post subject: Re: Should I Apologize?
Posted: 05 Jun 2019, 8:51 am 

Replies: 34
Views: 788


BTDT wrote:
Yes, let it go. There is no reason for you to apologize. Social competition. He lost. You won. He needs to deal with it.


BTDT, thank you, I feel a consensus being formed

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Should I Apologize?

 Post subject: Re: Should I Apologize?
Posted: 05 Jun 2019, 8:42 am 

Replies: 34
Views: 788


Fnord, thank you.

That is my current position. I am not good at these things and am interested in what other people think. A consensus is reassuring. He has pulled this crap on me before.

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Should I Apologize?

 Post subject: Should I Apologize?
Posted: 05 Jun 2019, 7:51 am 

Replies: 34
Views: 788


First, I am undiagnosed, avoidant and have a social cognition deficit. My brother is angry and will not talk to me. The problem stems from an invitation to my elderly aunt's party. I was a last minute invite, most likely another person canceled and there was room for one more. My brother and his wif...

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Traveling to Japan in 2 years..what to expect?

Posted: 04 Jun 2019, 5:25 pm 

Replies: 15
Views: 303


Osaka is a wonderful city and you will have fun. The Japanese are gracious and hospitable towards their guests. You should find a way to tell your friend about your special needs. Give them a signal when you are feeling overloaded and let them find a way to shield you from the problem. Osaka is a bi...

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: social aversion?

 Post subject: Re: social aversion?
Posted: 01 Jun 2019, 2:43 pm 

Replies: 10
Views: 356


Yes, phone calls at night trigger the same response.

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Neurotypical (NT) feedback requested!

Posted: 01 Jun 2019, 7:15 am 

Replies: 59
Views: 1,209


My favorite scientist on this subject is Uta Frith.

https://sites.google.com/site/utafrith/Home

Shalom

Paul

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Neurotypical (NT) feedback requested!

Posted: 01 Jun 2019, 5:27 am 

Replies: 59
Views: 1,209


Teacher51, Thank you for the advice. You are a nice person and your friend is lucky to have found you. Some of us do not have the luxury of support. We are thrust into the deep end and expected to swim. As a result, we labor like Sisyphus until we are able to get away. Avoidance becomes our escape, ...

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Neurotypical (NT) feedback requested!

Posted: 31 May 2019, 4:09 pm 

Replies: 59
Views: 1,209


Teacher 51, listening versus solving, yes you nailed it. You also mentioned another topic about communication. I can give a compliment, but my voice, my face, my body language carry more weight than my words. Many of us get the nonverbal cues all wrong. This is a social cognition deficit. I have spe...

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: The Social RULES Do NOT Apply to Us

Posted: 31 May 2019, 3:52 pm 

Replies: 58
Views: 1,540


The fact that you can't find a "good way" to extricate yourself doesn't surprise me at all. You're agreeing with my premise without realizing it. That's why you're so confused, you can't understand what I'm saying even though it's right there before your eyes. My friend, you speak with th...

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: The Social RULES Do NOT Apply to Us

Posted: 31 May 2019, 6:50 am 

Replies: 58
Views: 1,540


Some autistics seem to believe that because our social skills are diminished by biological happenstance that social rules are inherently bullshit. I am not one such autistic. I may be underdeveloped at interacting with people, but I understand its importance. I'm the OP and I never said it wasn't i...

 Forum: Love and Dating   Topic: Advice for allistic women on relating to autistic BF

Posted: 29 May 2019, 6:05 pm 

Replies: 25
Views: 665


Understood, I am just your topic as an excuse to express some of my opinions. No offense intended and I wish you happiness and success with your relationships.

 Forum: Love and Dating   Topic: Advice for allistic women on relating to autistic BF

Posted: 29 May 2019, 4:48 pm 

Replies: 25
Views: 665


This is for Teacher51. I found that reading novels, especially ones that focus on relationships and emotions, to be very helpful in understanding how to communicate with others. Novelists let you get into someone's head. This is a skill I do not possess, I use rules to compensate. Your partner may ...

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Neurotypical (NT) feedback requested!

Posted: 29 May 2019, 4:24 am 

Replies: 59
Views: 1,209


Youl find kind of bitterness because many autistic people experienced lots of bullying, verbal problems or don't understand nonverbal things in speech and body language. Many autist dont get other people emotionally. That's why they may act a bit rude sometimes and often aren't really well liked fo...

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Neurotypical (NT) feedback requested!

Posted: 28 May 2019, 9:54 am 

Replies: 59
Views: 1,209


This is for Teacher51. I found that reading novels, especially ones that focus on relationships and emotions, to be very helpful in understanding how to communicate with others. Novelists let you get into someone's head. This is a skill I do not possess, I use rules to compensate. Your partner may b...

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Sense of guilty and remorse for social interactions

Posted: 27 May 2019, 11:17 am 

Replies: 11
Views: 254


The problem is when these interactions are inside your family. I make you an example, I was having lunch before (30 minutes ago) and everytime I had the chance to pickle on my brothers I did it, thus making them angry. Bothering other people (touching them, joking with them) is something I really c...

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Levels of severity?

 Post subject: Re: Levels of severity?
Posted: 26 May 2019, 7:36 am 

Replies: 23
Views: 507


I have been away for a while, not diagnosed but I have the social cognition deficits as defined in ASD level 1. My abilities in planning and organizing are okay. The necessary skills were drilled into me over the years and I can reduce complex tasks into doable pieces. As an adult, learning how to &...
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