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 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Not being handled much as a child.

Posted: 09 Jun 2022, 8:30 pm 

Replies: 12
Views: 582


Case study: (1) My AS mother also caressed and massaged me and told me she loved me. (2) My AS BFF's AS parents never touched her nor told her they loved her. I think it depends in part on upbringing, personality and self-awareness/improvement. I am an AS mother. My AS daughter avoids touch, but enj...

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Emotional Regulation

 Post subject: Re: Emotional Regulation
Posted: 06 Jun 2022, 6:17 pm 

Replies: 11
Views: 538


I completely relate. I like what you did with the boxes. In lieu of apologizing, you could thank the person. "I know I reacted very strongly, thank you for...." My therapist advises I can also say "I'm working on it..." Therapy and tools have helped me. I am just now teaching my ...

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Have you come back from a "first impression deficit"?

Posted: 06 Jun 2022, 6:07 pm 

Replies: 16
Views: 539


Except it's in the court of NT social norms, such as it is :roll: Exactly that. IMHO there typically isn't sufficient context. Stranger shuns me: is it because of my high energy, is it because I'm not wearing make up, is it because I talked for over 30 second or under 5 seconds, is it because I loo...

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Have you come back from a "first impression deficit"?

Posted: 05 Jun 2022, 2:23 pm 

Replies: 16
Views: 539


The "getting to know me" is very important. If a person won't do that - it's game over for that relationship. I get friends and jobs and opportunities from people who I see repeatedly and get to know me. This is why classes, contracting and volunteering have led to my employment, b/c (NT) ...

 Forum: Women's Discussion   Topic: Makeup

 Post subject: Re: Makeup
Posted: 03 Jun 2022, 8:17 pm 

Replies: 21
Views: 1,447


Not on a daily basis. If I want to make a better impression for NTs: concealer under my eyes. Next step is subtle lipstick. It's a big deal when I take out the eyeliner. I haven't worn mascara or blush in well over 5 years. When I was younger, I wore makeup more often. As a teenager I was into eye s...

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Fear of f***ing things up- a question

Posted: 02 Jun 2022, 7:18 pm 

Replies: 18
Views: 699


Well, I do have a tendency to do really well or do fantastically awful (and not much in between). So it's not such much a fear as fact for me. :twisted: The trick for me is to embrace the F up's.

 Forum: Women's Discussion   Topic: Shaving legs

 Post subject: Re: Shaving legs
Posted: 01 Jun 2022, 11:55 pm 

Replies: 20
Views: 1,030


I no longer shave my legs. I am in the US, mid life and blonde. I was teased when I was younger and more regularly shaved (or other hair removal). I have not had anyone pick on my recently although the standard in my region is for women to shave. Kids comment on my facial hair and a friend privately...

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: You may be ADHD if...

 Post subject: Re: You may be ADHD if...
Posted: 31 May 2022, 6:06 pm 

Replies: 40
Views: 1,730


... today a co-worker asked you why some papers were left by the filing cabinet and you ask "are they W's?" with the small inkling that you walked away from an in-progress task and forgot to return, and the co-worker answers "yes".

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Feeling like an inconvenience to ppl?

Posted: 28 May 2022, 10:05 am 

Replies: 12
Views: 593


OP, for sure. I'm learning to "own it". To more or less project "I know I am different. I'm ok with that. Your turn to decide." The only way I "fit" in was to be quiet, or too desperately accommodate others. Now I'm looking for folks who are like-minded or able to mutua...

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Looking racially ambiguous with Asperger's

Posted: 25 May 2022, 2:25 pm 

Replies: 13
Views: 696


My husband is indigenous to his native country and is a nationalized immigrant in my native country. He's spent half his life in each. He is of both worlds which has pros and cons. His adopted and his native languages are both imperfect and yet he speaks more language than many people in both countr...

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Manage work, kids, relationship

Posted: 24 May 2022, 6:23 pm 

Replies: 8
Views: 436


I structure my time with the kids or set my expectations as "unstructured" time and give myself over to it. I keep my outside stress down or do some serious self-care. A couple years ago with work stress and sensory overwhelm I couldn't even play a boardgame with my children and they could...

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Who hates filling out forms?

Posted: 22 May 2022, 8:40 am 

Replies: 13
Views: 436


I have a love/hate relationship with forms. If they are clear and I readily have the information, that is good. If either of those conditions is invalid, then it's really tough. If I have related or other concerns "hanging over" me, the ante goes up. I panic when an admin comes back and as...

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Are you "too friendly"?

 Post subject: Re: Are you "too friendly"?
Posted: 21 May 2022, 9:51 am 

Replies: 32
Views: 1,156


I lacked the typical amount of "stranger danger" as a child. Even now I am "overly" open. There is a "too nice" characteristic associated with physical aspects called "Angelman's Syndrome" which overlaps with ASD. I relate strongly to it, but without the stron...

 Forum: Women's Discussion   Topic: 'Diagnosis is rebirth'

 Post subject: Re: 'Diagnosis is rebirth'
Posted: 21 May 2022, 9:41 am 

Replies: 3
Views: 631


Thank you for sharing this.

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Lucid Dreaming

 Post subject: Re: Lucid Dreaming
Posted: 20 May 2022, 7:44 pm 

Replies: 26
Views: 837


Decades ago a therapist taught me to lucid dream (the control aspect), so I could deal with nighttime acute anxiety. It worked. Recently I have been subconsciously processing deep emotions in my sleep and it goes well. It provides me a lot of relief. I have suggested to both my children that they ca...

 Forum: General Autism Discussion   Topic: Inability to have conversations

Posted: 20 May 2022, 7:37 pm 

Replies: 28
Views: 894


What are your thoughts as to why? An increased level of background stress, chemical or physical changes?
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