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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Husband wanting to invite people over to our house |
Ashariel |
Posted: 31 Dec 2013, 11:55 am
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Replies: 30 Views: 2,313
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My in-laws always stressed me out too, and basically wanted me to be a completely different person from who I really am. I guess it's a matter of compromise between you and your husband – so that he gets to spend some time with his family, but it stays within the limits of your coping ability. Would... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: can people with autism be good at dealing with the public |
Ashariel |
Posted: 30 Dec 2013, 6:25 pm
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Replies: 15 Views: 1,519
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I can interact with people as long as I'm basically following a script, and don't have to improvise. I'm okay at business interactions that have a specific purpose, and involve an exchange of necessary information. But when it comes to just talking for the sake of talking (because other people find ... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Would you take a cure? |
Ashariel |
Posted: 29 Dec 2013, 10:55 pm
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Replies: 88 Views: 3,641
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I would definitely like to be cured of my sensory issues and ADHD symptoms. As for the rest... If I could be upgraded to the very highest-functioning end of the autistic spectrum, I'd be happy with that. Able to get by in the world, yet still feel like myself in terms of basic personality. |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: how well are you adjusted? |
Ashariel |
Posted: 29 Dec 2013, 10:24 pm
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Replies: 16 Views: 1,265
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I can manage basic politeness and respectful behavior, but I can't "improvise" in social situations, or think of anything to say outside of what I've been taught is polite and expected. (Unless people want to hear about my special interests, which 99.9% of the time they don't! Haha) |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Facial asymmetry |
Ashariel |
Posted: 29 Dec 2013, 6:56 pm
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Replies: 2 Views: 533
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I have moderate asymmetry, and definitely had a traumatic pregnancy and birth. I've always felt self-conscious about it, but like so many autistic symptoms, it's strangely comforting to know that this is actually fairly typical, and just another part of the package deal! |
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Forum: Bipolar, Tourettes, Schizophrenia, and other Psychological Conditions Topic: Narcassistic Personality Disorder |
Ashariel |
Posted: 27 Dec 2013, 7:18 pm
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Replies: 26 Views: 2,573
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We suspect that my aunt has NPD, and she has made her three (adult) children miserable – to the point that the youngest killed himself a few years ago, specifically because of how she made him feel. I don't want to be a hypocrite, and say that people with NPD and BPD are toxic – because I hate when ... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: You know you're autistic when... |
Ashariel |
Posted: 27 Dec 2013, 3:02 pm
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Replies: 603 Views: 60,004
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...Your therapist is trying to rule out paranoia as a symptom, and asks you a hypothetical question: "When you're in a social situation and you see people talking together, do you think they're talking about you?" To which you reply: "I'm not in social situations enough for that to actually happen!"... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: Family members issues |
Ashariel |
Posted: 27 Dec 2013, 2:54 pm
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Replies: 2 Views: 1,166
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I don't understand either, what motivates people to be cruel, and put others down. Maybe it makes them feel superior, and better about themselves? :? I'm sorry that your family treats you that way, that really sucks. I would avoid holiday get-togethers with them if possible (and in fact I do with my... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: Wanting Friends vs. Being Needy? |
Ashariel |
Posted: 27 Dec 2013, 2:15 pm
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Replies: 13 Views: 1,524
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I have sensory issues with dogs (I can't stand the slobber, or the smell, or the barking, or the licking... Eeek!) And despite all my whining, I really don't want to get out and interact with people in real life. But those all sound like great ideas, for people who enjoy those things! :) I've been d... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: How to get over loosing a friend - any ideas? |
Ashariel |
Posted: 27 Dec 2013, 10:03 am
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Replies: 18 Views: 1,356
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I wish I knew the answer. I've been trying for 3 years to get over my husband's rejection, but it's just really hard. The only tactic I can suggest is to just keep distracting yourself with other activities and interests, to keep your mind off it – so then at least you've spent your day doing things... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: Wanting Friends vs. Being Needy? |
Ashariel |
Posted: 27 Dec 2013, 9:43 am
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Replies: 13 Views: 1,524
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The dog analogy is interesting... Actually, I've always thought I'm much more like a cat, or a hamster. My hamster is ecstatic to see me when she first wakes up in the evening, and loves to be held and cuddled – for about five minutes, and then "okay thanks bye" – and for the next 24 hours she prefe... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: Wanting Friends vs. Being Needy? |
Ashariel |
Posted: 26 Dec 2013, 3:08 pm
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Replies: 13 Views: 1,524
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Thanks for the responses! I'm still feeling like my recent desire for socializing is a danger signal. That I shouldn't look to other people to fill this emptiness that I'm feeling. I should take responsibility for my own happiness, and not expect other people to magically fix things for me. I don't ... |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: Were you a gifted child? How are you seen as adult? |
Ashariel |
Posted: 26 Dec 2013, 1:24 pm
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Replies: 203 Views: 40,710
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I was a child prodigy musician, and everyone expected to see me at Carnegie Hall one day. As an adult, I live with my parents, have no job, no friends, and have failed dramatically at functioning in the "real world". (That wasn't meant to sound whiny, I'm just stating the facts here! Haha) It's been... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: Need some help coping |
Ashariel |
Posted: 26 Dec 2013, 1:05 pm
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Replies: 10 Views: 1,100
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Forgiveness is tough. I'm working on that too, with my own ex. What's helped for me is to break it down into basic logic. People are human. Humans are imperfect. Humans make mistakes, and do stupid things, that sometimes hurt others. I forgive my ex for being human, and imperfect, and doing stupid t... |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: Holidays Drive Anyone Else Nuts? |
Ashariel |
Posted: 26 Dec 2013, 12:47 pm
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Replies: 14 Views: 1,516
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Big family holiday celebrations are a nightmare for me too. I used to try to participate, and "grin and bear it", but about a decade ago I finally admitted to my family that it was too much for me, and that I needed to limit my participation in holiday festivities. I'm really lucky that my family wa... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: How I broke free |
Ashariel |
Posted: 26 Dec 2013, 12:22 pm
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Replies: 30 Views: 1,699
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I really appreciate what you said, and it expresses something that I wish I could share with people (in an effort to help them) but I just don't know how to get it across, in a way anyone would understand. I was suicidal from age 7 to 39, because I felt absolutely hopeless in my ability to be the so... |
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