How do I know if I have aspergers/autsim or Im just..

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aspardon
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02 Apr 2011, 10:42 pm

..shy/anxious/quiet/weird/intorverted etc?

Having read up a lot I think I am..If I make a list of symptoms mayeb you could give your thoughts?

-I suffer from ''agoraphobia'' from young age. Unable to travel far from home, too much noise, traffic, sounds etc...even just outside my door or nearby shops har work.

- I cannot do eye contact with people. I dont know why I just cannot do it.

- I cannot converse. I have never been able to converse my whole life, really I have no desire to either, when I talk its all liek Im a machine thinking back to other people and repeating phrases they have used. I can tlak about things I am passion for though like music much eaiser.

- I feel I have no voice, I constructed my voice when young by mimicking those who were popular at school. Now I am long out of school as an adult I really feel lost that I have no voice and only really use expressions I heard on Tv etc..to learn how to talk. Like I wathc people on TV and copy them IRL.

- I have sex issues in that I am always really horny and perverted but have no desire or no skills to talk to females. I have used prostitues but left feeling angry that my inabilty and lack of care to pursue females leads me to this way so I dont really do it. I wacth copius hours of porn per day. As i find people akward I feel the same with males/females. Its easy to pay for sex than it is too socialise for sex. Socialising and sex is too complex..this depresses me a lot being so horny and no money.

- I wlak real funny. I always feel I am going to trip up and sometimes cant breathe right. I slouch a lot and have bad psoture also just by preference really though.

- I cannot even talk to family memebers, aunties, uncels etc...face to face...Its too much.

- I get exhausted when people talk to me etc..I just zone out. I feel as if I am alone and never really there mentally just in presence.

-I was exepctioanl at physcis/maths at school and at university BUT is this due to so much free time alone to study or some other reason?

- I have a blank facial expression. I do laugh a lot but usually people think Im depressed by my face.

_ i find speaking very difficult usually not only in thinking what to say but having to do it..I often stutter or mumble or say the worng thing or the wrong words or lots of silent pauses. Speaking out loud is near impossible eg..I was in gym recently and dropped barbell on my chest I did not hav ethe voice or courage or ability to shout loud for help.

- I always use weird phrases and speech like I am very immature when I get excited and do speak.

- I can play video games and wacth porn easily over 5-10hrs per day.

-I follow same routines everyday. Diet/exercise etc...also

- I can be overly confident and look arrogant when I am comfotable aroudn people. I do lack empathy a lot. I just say thigns without thinking..eg. At new job I didnt knwo peoples names I just reffered to women I was lookign for as 'big fat woman'' the people in the work gave me weird look. then I realise that was rude I guess. But I was just describing her as she is nothing personal.

-I often avoid people I know so as to avoid conversation.

- I find it impossible almost to go to busy shops and shopping centres etc..I sweat, walk funny, cant breather...to many lights, open sapce, noise etc..

- I look 5-10 years younger than my age

- I often do weird stuff like go out with my jumper on the wrong way round or zip open or other stupid things liek that

- People that dotn know me often say 'why he so quiet'' 'hes weird'etc....people that I knew really well say 'hes funny''hes cool'' 'etc..

-I cant socialise if there is more than 3 people in the conversation, its too much

- at school they used to always think i was stoned. I just pretned I was at it made it easier to excuse my weird stuff.

- I often stare at things or just look aroudn like a lost boy. People would look and kinda laugh at me.

- I just never feel here..I play soccer but I dont even feel right like there is too mcuh going on aroudn me its overwhelming. Im good at soccer but rubish team player. I am good at golf, playing guitar etc...as really only on me.

- I take comments literally eg..when I play soccer for my team I was told to play left back and he said you stay at left side of box, so I stayed there the whol game and never moved lmao. I realised when older how wrong that was haha.



I seem to have a large skull and quite abnormal shaped IMO. KInd along and similar to what is described for fragile x. Which has similar problems as aspergers so I read.

Prob more stuff but thats all I can think of now.
I dont know whats different about being on the autism spectrum and aspergers exactly?

I have been back and forth to pyscholgists since I was 13 years old, now mid 20s...and still seeing pscyhiatrists. Only for anxiety, social anxiety and someaht agoraphobia.

Never been looked into for aspergers/autism.



ghostpawn
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03 Apr 2011, 12:44 am

Almost all of what you said sounds like anxiety, anxiety, and more anxiety. What little is left sounds totally normal and/or insignificant.

I can make an improvised speech in front of a large audience, no problem. But I can't read body language enough to know when it's my turn to speak in face-to-face conversation.

Look for some books or online guides on facial expressions - if most of it doesn't surprise you, then you probably don't have AS.


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Apple_in_my_Eye
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03 Apr 2011, 1:22 am

There are a lot of reasons why you might or might not get an answer worth anything, about that question, on a message board.

You can try some of the online tests, you can read what people say on message boards, and see if it makes sense to you, and, if you think it's necessary or would be helpful, you could try to see a professional for an assessment.

And I'd say take any surer-than-sure pronouncements with a grain of salt. No one can tell one way or the other for sure over the internet.



aspardon
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03 Apr 2011, 11:50 am

Well I always assumed anxiety but having read so much about autism/aspergers it seems a more likely I beleive.

I have always felt there is osmething wrong with me adn I could not pinpoint it. Its like I have always felt not here really. I dunno just so many thing snever felt right that are a lot more than just being anxious.

even when I take drugs or alchol to reuce anxiety, I still dont feel right and still cannot converse normally so its not just anxiety. I truely belvie my brain just aint wired up normally, though I doubt even most normal people are wired up normally haha. BUt the issues I have just seems to me somehting more than simple anxiety.

For example this is really weird but surely not the signs off a NT person- I did not begin to masturbate until I was 18 years old...NOw surley that aint normal? It jsut never occored to me to 'masturbate' as a youngster and I never even realised you could ejalcuate though boys from school used to tlak about it I had no idea what they were tlaking about.

Once I left school and a lot of time alone I just started to play with it one day and it even took 12+ months before I got courage to 'make it' ejaculate.

I mean looking back this aint normal at all.

I remember my friends bragging about sex acts and stuff when 14-15 I used to just go along and agree with them and pretend I done this and that. Truth is I never even touch my penis lol...NOw that is so weird. Esepcailly also considering.

1. I used to get erections when gfirls cuddled me in school form age of 13+

2. I sued to watch porn from 12-13+. Though I enver masturabte I used to just get erection in pants but never even look at it...How strange? I just liked to watch porn and my penis got bigger but I never touch or look at it lol.\

3. I had loads of smei-naked psoteers on my wall of Pamela Anderson Baywatch etc...

So, why the hell did I never masturabte....looking back I must be something real mentally wrong lol



aspardon
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03 Apr 2011, 12:02 pm

Also another weird thing liek at 18 I was 5'10-11 tall and 120lbs. Now I dont now if that related to aspergers or anythign but it aint normal.
I have been lifitn weights and weight ainig deits for years bu tcurrently only at 135lbs...Its really hard to gian weight.

At 18 I looked like I was 12 years old. I hardly look much older now. I dont know if anywya related aspergers or not but still not only do I cant weird I guess I dont look 'normal'either.


Also as much as I enjoy/obsess over porn and such I am not really at all interested in sexual intercourse...I do like to recieve orla and other stuff but I dont really seem to have any interest to have sexual intercourse at all. NOw this aint really normal either so I gather and psossibly many people with aspergers are asexual?

I mean I would love to get attractive girls naked, lick them, touch them, do sex acts but I really dont desire to haev sexual intercourse.



ghostpawn
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04 Apr 2011, 12:29 am

so far, while some of the things you said are weird or "too much info", i still think none of it has anything to do with AS

not to say that you can't have it, just nothing here to indicate either way

it's quite common for people with AS to have social anxiety problems, just like being blind can make someone afraid to cross busy streets... but many have anxiety without AS as well

most people with AS are not asexual, but some are ... is there some reason you talk about it so much?


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04 Apr 2011, 12:40 pm

Welkome to WrongPlanet. :)

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