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Juliette
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10 Oct 2006, 6:30 pm

Hi Stace! Welcome to WP. You're by no means alone.
With AS, the most stressful activity is having to socialize. There are some strategies and simple procedures for managing anxiety and stress eg. exercise(before and after), listening to music, massage, deep breathing, thinking positive thoughts. I find it much easier to socialize if the focus is on 'doing' eg, playing sport, playing games(trivial pursuit, cards etc) and I have to admit that a glass of champagne makes all the difference, though I'm in no way encouraging dependency on alcohol to get by.

You're among friends here :) .



skafather84
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10 Oct 2006, 6:32 pm

i'm not over 30 but i can tell you straight up that i was initially misdiagnosed as having social anxiety. which was actually more a result of the asperger's.



Keeno
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14 Oct 2006, 4:38 pm

Hi Stace, welcome to WrongPlanet!

I'm 31 and despite a few years where I significantly improved in social interaction, nevertheless I started from a very low base and still often feel on the outside in group situations.

I have had difficulties forming and maintaning relationships, which I attribute to my communication difficulties.



sociable_hermit
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14 Oct 2006, 4:54 pm

Keeno wrote:
Hi Stace, welcome to WrongPlanet!

I'm 31 and despite a few years where I significantly improved in social interaction, nevertheless I started from a very low base and still often feel on the outside in group situations.

I have had difficulties forming and maintaning relationships, which I attribute to my communication difficulties.


Same here.. including my age.


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Snowfern
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14 Oct 2006, 10:12 pm

i'll be 30 this year.

welcome to wp!



Leobluum
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15 Oct 2006, 1:30 am

I am 39, and just realized in the last couple of months that I am an aspie. I realized it when researching the issue for my 5 year old son, who has now bene diagnosed. I have been taking a very reflective view of my life the last couple of months, looking at all the problematic social situations with a different perspective.

I do share your concern about the age of folks on the site, since it seems most people that post onlne tend to be younger. I am not much used to posting myself, but I am in a rural area, so this site is my only connection to other aspies.

Good luck and welcome to the site



Steve45
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15 Oct 2006, 5:15 am

stace wrote:
I've never posted a message on a forum before, I'm not sure how this goes.

I'm in therapy now and i think that my social anxiety disorder is actually aspergers. I'm looking to talk to other adults, over 30, who have problems in social situations.

Any help and/or advice is greatly appreciated. Thanks.


I shared your apprehension when posting my first message. I'm over 30 and received my diagnosis this year at 45. I've experienced social anxiety all my life, though things that I've done recently have helped. As a child I used to hide behind sofas when a stranger came to the door. In my first job, my heart would race whenever the phone rang near me. In crowds or at parties I'd feel rising panic. What social situations make you most anxious?

The interventions that have helped me most with my social anxiety are:

- Talking about it with a good counsellor
- Learning relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing and progressive relaxation
- Neurofeedback (EEG biofeedback)

I can thoroughly recommend the exercises to help with social anxiety in the book, "The Relaxation & Stress Reduction Workbook", published by New Harbinger Publications. I think it's well suited to people with AS, because it starts with a questionnaire that helps you work out what kind of techniques might work best for you to solve your social anxiety. It actually distinguishes three types of anxiety:

- Anxiety in specific situations (tests, deadlines, interviews, etc)
- Anxiety in your personal relationships
- Anxiety, general (regardless of the situation or the people involved)

I hope this is of some help. I hope the therapy is working for you.

:)
Steve



Rhisiart_Steffan
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15 Oct 2006, 7:41 am

hi!


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markaudette
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17 Oct 2006, 8:11 am

I'm new here myself. I'm 34. So don't feel alone.



hyper_alien
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17 Oct 2006, 10:02 am

Hi and welcome to WP


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Rory
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19 Oct 2006, 5:30 am

Hello and welcome. I have social phobia as well as AS. Probably a lot of us are in the same boat. I started a thread on this just recently, you might like to have a look at it. Also, I recently found a social anxiety support group on Yahoo (Groups) which seems to be quite good, you might like to check it out.



Prof_Pretorius
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19 Oct 2006, 2:18 pm

Welcome Stace, I'm 50, and was considered 'odd' since childhood. In fact me mum used to enjoy telling me how oddly I acted as a lad. Being ASpic is just another way of being. It's wonderful to have discovered this forum and this crowd to hang out with (virtually at least). I've come to realize a lot of the things I've experienced are the same as people who post to these forums. So, join in, and tell us about yer experiences.

(By the way, that Church of Garlic stuff is a bot the mods run as an inside joke.)



Starbuline
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19 Oct 2006, 2:28 pm

Hello! Welcome!