New here so saying hello !

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Hi All

I’m a 52yr female and i’m currently going through the diagnostic assessment. I’ve filled in early years forms and spoken with the Doctor who has said I am definitely autistic and feels the final diagnostic session in August will end in a diagnosis of Aspergers. I have have four adult children: one with AS.

CurrantCottage

Welcome. Better late than never. I hope the diagnosis sheds some light on your experience of the first half century of your life

It took me two years just to ask my doctors if I was an aspie because each time I went in there I kept getting mind blank!

I expected to get a yes or a no answer and I wanted a yes or no, because it was on my mind and I wanted to either discard it or accept it... You see I wanted to find out what the shutdowns were/are as I had spent years trying to find out what was going on and was frustrated.

I am in the beginnings end of a partial shutdown now.. Distracting myself so I don't get one so I need to think about something else... Uhmm. Will spend a little time on a model railway site and be back...

Oh. What I wanted to ask is "Where you live, is it your doctors who diagnose?"

Here we have a specialist autism team with psycologists, but there is a waiting list to be seen. I joined this site soon after I was put on the list as I had a question to ask.

Must go.

Welcome to WP! I think you will find some nice people here.

And I hope you see your diagnosis as a welcome revelation. I know I did! I was 64 when I got the diagnosis and had already muddled my way through life OK but it was nice to find out why it felt like I had been living in an episode of The Twilight Zone...or on the Wrong Planet!

Hi Mountain Goat

I am sure my GP would put me forward for assessment but to be truthful I am way too scared to go and ask ! ! I spent months off/on googling private assessment ...and "online" because going places scares me - I can only do it if I absolutely have to! Long story short (because I can ramble on) only one out of a handful of people I emailed replied to say they would. It was Anne Marie Gallagher from Connect To Autism who has worked in the NHS for 35 yrs and is also doing work privately. One of the reviews refers to her as Dr Gallagher ...so I'm guessing she is a doctor ...but I dont know!! ! I filled in the early years forms and then chatted with her over the phone (goes without saying I was pacing, stressed, blank mind etc etc) about my childhood. She said to me that if I wished to go on with the full diagnostic assessment and receive a report I would definitely be getting a diagnosis of autism - probably AS. She explained how she devised the forms years ago for NHS use and when they come in at work her and colleagues talk over them and put them into three piles "definitely autistic", "not autistic" and "possibly" before ringing the client back -she said I was in the definitely autistic pile.

It was a relief because Ive always felt odd and always struggled and spent my life trying to act normal and fit in - even at times with my husband and family! Autism has never been on my radar until my middle son was diagnosed with AS at Uni two years ago - I started googling to look into it and was just floored because it was like reading about the issues I have - minus the high intelligence or high creativity ...I'm lacking in those departments!

It will be a relief to have a full diagnosis and I'm totally obsessing ...in fact have ever since my son told me about his diagnosis. I'd never heard of things like "stimming" before - nor realised thats what I do!! ! And of course I'm hyper aware now of things I do that "arent normal" and generally I feel more awkward than I normally do ! !

Oh and I'm in the UK - Southern part !

It is such a relief ! !! ! I think when I get used to the idea it will be easier - at the moment I just seem to be hyper aware of everything I do or say and feel more awkard than ever ! !

And thank you for the welcome !

Thank you ! !!

Welcome Aboard, please watch out for the caution signs when making your way to your stateroom, just kidding; anyways, I hope you will find a great amount of serenity and information to help you overall.

I will be careful!

welcome, my kids were grown and flown before I learned of my autism, and theirs. Now so much more of my life makes sense! All those "why" questions of the past seem to have involved autism without me or anybody else ever suspecting. Nobody knew. Glad you are with us. Enjoy exploring. I love the "aha" moments when yet another struggle is given perspective through the knowing about my autism.

Just noticed your reply.

Yes. That makes logical sense to have three piles like that.

I am in the southern part of Wales which is the western southern part.

The wierd thing is that though I have been outside of Wales a few times, I am on edge when I do. I am also a bit on edge when driving in the south eastern populated parts of Wales but not quite so much.

I seem to have an odd barrier where if I go outside of Wales, it is as if I am on a massive bungee chord which pulls me back into Wales? Yet I can travel up through Wales into North Wales or right across into the coasts of West Wales and feel at ease. I am wierd like that.

Mind you, I prefer rural parts where I am relaxed.

I tend to like travelling through Wales with my Mum or someone I feel safe with (If alone I tend to only travel locally before I come back), but at the same time I do all I can to avoid crowds and unless I know what to expect, I usually avoid trying to meet people... As in... Well. I will prefer to go to quiet places. I do not go somewhere because lots of people are there. I go the other way usually unless trains are involved! (I like trains!)

Put it this way. There has to be a reason for me to be in a crowd for me to be there, otherwize I would do all I can to avoid it...

But at the same time I will do a small group though I usually end up an outcast... So situations like being in a collage... I don't even want to go there as I have to mask and mask until the masking wears off and then I am a complete loner and get bullied. So these days I am not sure I could do it for long. I dread visiting places where I have to go to meet people. It is not the people. It is the enviroment. Oh, if I could meet someone I have to meet for whatever reason in a field instead of a busy building it would be soo much easier, even if it is raining and blowing a gale... It would still be easier...

I would then avoid most of the anxiety.

If only dentists and doctors did field work, where it would be just them and me meeting in the middle of a field... Haha! I would find it so much easier!

Welcome and good luck.