What is WP for?

Post Reply New Topic

Serious question, as any "support" function at this point is purely provided by the opportunity to interact with other autistic people, yet those interactions keep being artificially constrained by rigid enforcement of some of the more nitpicky and subjective elements of the ToS, lately the "thread derailment" rule that feel very weaponized. Conversation is organic, it goes off on tangents and pursues digressions, but that's not being allowed to happen, even resulting in whole threads with interesting sidebar conversations being memory holed because someone got pissy that their narrow conception of what "on topic" means wasn't adhered to, and I can't help but feel that it's a contributing factor to the decline of the site.

Further, it belies the often heard refrain of stretched thin moderators struggling to maintain order, as these interventions only further inflame relations on the board and create further conflict and headaches, and for what? So someone doesn't have to scroll past conversation that they think is in the wrong spot? Despite the constant accusations, I don't think I've ever seen a thread deliberately "derailed" here, what I see is people riffing on the topics to engage in conversations, which again are the only thing this board provides, and I don't see why this should be a matter requiring moderation at all, let alone the frequency with which it has been happening lately.

This feels particularly egregious in News and PPR, which have no support function and are purely discussion boards, yet those discussions are not being allowed to happen unless they conform to some preconceived notions of order that simply don't reflect the reality of how people talk. Yes, I know, we have a ToS, but I also know there is broad discretion in when and how it is applied, and I think this is a bad use of said discretion both for reasons of stifling the thing the board is here for, and as a waste of moderator time and resources. Just let it rip, people might even enjoy themselves.

That's somewhat generalised, conflates "support" with discussion of news stories, and creates the impression that many threads are regularly corralled into a more bounded direction despite natural conversational flow that is "not being allowed to happen" - where in fact, considering the huge number of active conversations here, such events are quite rare.
Yes yes, I know - you'll be itching to link to a few threads but please spare us. What you're describing is not a common event and in the overwhelming majority of cases threads are allowed to carry on in their own merry way - conversational flow, off-topic sidebars and all.

So, to present a logical extreme which completely resolves any on/off topic or sidebar issues, let's have one forum with one topic - "Discuss whatever you want here", and it's allowed to proceed in whatever direction the contributors want.
Now scale it back into something practical that can be managed.

Let's have the membership define "off-topic" and "conversation flow" so we know unambiguously where and when to step in.

Discuss.

What is WP for?

For me, it's for a bit of like-minded human interaction that I am unable to achieve face to face.

Unless it's at least 2 pages of 'non-related' debate (which is open to interpretation depending on the user) I personally think it's up to the OP to steer their thread back on topic if they have a vested interest. Unless of course they feel doing so brings unwanted attention, then they should PM a moderator for help. I don't feel it's up to anyone but the OP or a 'moderator under instruction' who can define 'off-topic'.

WP is for making friends and knowing we aren't alone, even though we aren't exactly alike.
It's a sense of community for me, even when people squabble.

I could never sustain this level of social interaction in real life.

I have ADHD and can't think in a linear way to save my life.
I think in pieces and details, finding connections between experiences.

Personally I think it's OK for the conversation to take its own trajectory like in real life.
It's annoying when a topic devolves to sex unnecessarily, or to weather forecasts.

Most of the time though, the OP can reel it back in.

I agree with Doberdoofus and Isabella Linton.

I meet no one in real life as I work at home alone. And when I do meet people I might as well be speaking a foreign language as I can't connect with them. On WP at least I find a few people I seem to connect with.

Part of the issue though is that no one listens to the OP. Everyone feels the need to argue with the OP and further derail the thread, as if they can decide what the topic was meant for, not the OP. People need to learn to stop if the OP wants them to stop, and then moderators won't have to waste their time with it.

A community for autistic people (diagnosed or not) and anyone who is interested in autism. As well as being a forum, it's also probably an information source for autism.

The major purpose of such a community is to interact rather anonymously with other people with similar life experiences. Many people on WP feel alone in real life. This is where they get their dose of human interaction. Further, maybe to make friends? Then everything else is like any other online community where people discuss stuff.

For me it's where I spew my rubbish and read other members' unimportant grumbles etc. Having been a member for about 4.5 months, that's how I see it.

Yes ^^ . I agree with Hero (and Doofus)

I always read the OP question and try to answer it all, like an exam prompt.
Later in the thread I might go with the flow of conversation (slightly off-topic).

It's bothersome when the OP explicitly says they don't want (x,y,z) but it happens anyway.
It happened to me once.
I asked for a very defined topic and reminded people but they still didn't respect it.
I've seen that happen to you too, Hero.

Sometimes people jump in and don't answer the OP at all.
That happens in real life, but it shouldn't take more than one reminder to get back on track.

IMO it's fine for a thread to veer to a tangentially related topic as long as the OP doesn't care + the related topic hasn't been overdone to death. If the topic has been overdone and the OP is talking about something more specific + tells people to stop since that's not the topic they're on, then people need to practice self control and stop, or just make their own thread for it. Grown adults shouldn't be hijacking threads against the OPs will and going "but... I want to talk about this..." when told to knock it off.

What is WP for?

It's a place for people who feel lonely and disenfranchised to find connection to other people.

I should add, inspired by what Radish said, that people seek to find that "connection" in different ways. Sometimes through political debate. Sometimes through just posting nonsensical things. And everywhere in between.

I find that it should be a support site. I feel that there should be healthy debate, but that people should be sensitive to other people's feelings.

I don't like the idea of censorship; it's fundamentally wrong and undemocratic to censor thought. But, sometimes, one has to draw the line. If something is really upsetting someone, then I'll stop whatever upset that person.

As for "derailing"----Sometimes, I feel that I'm accused of "derailing" whenever somebody doesn't agree with me about something. This accusation, sometimes, is used as a "rhetorical device."

I've had instances where I've been accused of "derailing"----when, in actuality, what I posted was related in a DIRECT way to the topic at hand. I find that the accusation of "derailing" was leveled at me for some other reason other than an instance of an actual "derailment."

Last edited by kraftiekortie on 31 Aug 2022, 8:31 am, edited 3 times in total.

WP can mean different things to people at different points in their life. When I first joined more than a decade ago it was to find out more about Aspergers and share experiences with others. Nowadays I'm comfortable in my skin and don't really need any sort of support; so I just come on here to have a laugh and post nonsense in Off The Wall with like-minded folks.

I'd say 75% - 80% of my posts have been word games, music, or book titles.

The games really helped me rebuild vocabulary and fluency after my first stroke.
The music is always therapeutic.

It's easier exploring my thoughts in written form than speaking, and when I just "think" my thoughts they get jumbled because of ADHD. WP helps me to at least attempt being semi-coherent again.

Off-Topic: Not on the main topic; irrelevant to the discussion; a statement or claim that does not contribute to the current discussion.

Example: The introduction of actions that took place long before the current administration by people whose involvement in the current administration is nil.

Conversation Flow: On the main topic; relevant or specific to the discussion; statements or claims that contribute directly to the current discussion.

Example: The introduction of actions that took place during the current administration by people who are currently, officially, and actively involved in the current administration.

I came into WrongPlanet for the express purpose of seeking to relate to people who are autistic, Aspergian, or Asperger's-like (I fit into the third category).

That was my SOLE purpose in coming on this Site.

Last edited by kraftiekortie on 31 Aug 2022, 8:53 am, edited 1 time in total.

Conversation Flow:

We all have a degree of difficulty with social interaction in real life, so this is a good place to practise.
I picture WP like a party or a workplace with people coming and going, having conversations.

If a colleague popped into my office asking about Topic X, I'd answer them and have a bit of reciprocal conversation on that theme, but also diverge a bit in a collegial way so they can get to know me better. As more colleagues wander past us they might join into our conversation at the midpoint, which tilts the topic to something new when their perspective is added. The rapport goes from there with people interjecting and asking questions back and forth, joking around, sharing anecdotes, or giving advice. There will always be that one guy saying "Get back to work!" or rolling his eyes because he wants to follow the rules. There's also bound to be someone who barges in completely off-topic, saying "I love soup!" or something totally random. Most people are somewhere in the middle, enjoying the rapport and making friends.

The same can be said of a party, even if it's a polite dinner party and people interject.

We all know what it feels like when Uncle Fred steals your limelight and you don't know how to steer the conversation back to what you wanted to say. We also know what it feels like to be part of a group dynamic and respect everyone for their contributions and differing points of view in an organic conversation which grows and changes comfortably.

Off-Topic:

As long as the off-topic comments aren't completely disrespectful (e.g., in The Haven), and the OP keeps participating / doesn't mind the diverging topic, I think it's usually OK. I wouldn't want strict rules where we can only discuss certain subjects from a certain POV or else we get in trouble by Big Brother.

I doubt CF wants to be Big Brother anyway.

I'll have to find a meme on that.

Yes, acceptable conversation flow would be different perspective on the same topic, being told to get back to work would be like "locking the thread", and derailment would be the interjection of something irrelevant and unrelated to the topic of conversation.