Social Life in High School vs. College

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d057
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23 Jan 2011, 6:28 pm

I try to explain the stresses of being a senior in high school, and try to be hopeful that “normal” won’t exist in college.



http://dwarren57.wordpress.com/2011/01/ ... aspergers/


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Cyanide
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23 Jan 2011, 6:43 pm

I actually preferred high school social life. Yes, it was really cliquey. Yes, I was ostracized by most people. However, I still had friends. I had good acquaintances I'd talk to in the cafeteria during lunch and/or my free period.

I'm graduating from college in March, and I haven't made a single friend. That's right, zero new friends. All the stuff I heard about how I'll make so many friends, and find so many people like me was a big lie. I've found my fellow college "students" to be boring and stupid for the most part. Maybe that's just what I get for not trying to get into a better school, maybe not. Either way, all my peers at school really care about is partying and getting high. Did I mention that most of them are dumber than bricks, too?



emjay89
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23 Jan 2011, 6:47 pm

I liked university when it came to making friends. Our tutors made it easier for us as well :-P.
First class, he walked in and said "turn to the person next to you. say hi and introduce yourself".

The other way...groupwork
Made heaps of friends that way haha.



Simonono
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23 Jan 2011, 6:59 pm

School was so much better. I knew tons of people very well. I literally haven't been in a college class with anyone I knew at school :(. I've also only made about one friend at college; a lot of them just don't suit me well. Sure I hated school with a passion but there were some classic times there :D.



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23 Jan 2011, 7:53 pm

I like college better. There are still cliques but I finally felt like I was there for myself. I never tried to make any friends and I don't feel any less for it, probably because my college is like a Jersey Shore re-enactment



Descartes
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23 Jan 2011, 10:11 pm

I like college social life way better. I'm only in the second semester of my first year, and I'm already making new friends with whom to socialize outside of school. My social life is looking very promising.


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brule
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28 Jan 2011, 2:50 pm

I much prefer college, because I feel like it's easier to find a community that's more fitting to your needs there. For example, I live in an honors dorm, in the most social area on my campus. As a result, everyone is really intelligent (and fairly quirky, with a number of people I suspect of being aspies), but also extremely social. Definitely look for any special interest opportunity that applies to you, that way you'll be with people who are more aligned with your interests.



ddrapayo
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30 Jan 2011, 3:08 pm

I go to the University of Connecticut, which is a big school with over 18,000 undergrads. It also has a dedicates AS Program (albeit a small one). But the point is, at a school this size, there are going to be people like you. But with 18,000 other students out there, don't expect to sit around and have them come to you. Because that's not happening. I am actively involved in UConn Students for Liberty (a Libertarian student organization) and the Math Club (actually, I haven't attended any meetings yet, but I'm a freshman and last semester their meeting time conflicted with a class, and our only meeting this semester was postponed because of the snow - but I will be attending once we actually have a meeting I can attend). I also meet people at sporting events - sports are huge here. I've looked at small schools too during my college search process. The organizations there are more active in recruiting than those at UConn, because they have to be. But it's also harder to find those that interest you. The fact is, at UConn, there's going to be at least one (and probably way more) clubs or activities that you'll find similar people in. But you've got to find those clubs. We have an involvement fair each semester, but it's cluttered and overwhelming, and you're not going to be able to talk to every single organization, nor should you want to.

On the other hand, my high school's graduating class had fewer students than my freshman calculus class (seriously). that being said, our school had some good extracurricular, and since those people were also my classmates in many cases, it was easier to hang out with them outside the activity. But most high schools of our size don't have so many activities. And even the large ones often aren't the greatest. But it depends on the high school/college. Some large universities have very few activities, while many small ones (Ivies especially) have a lot. But you're not going to get anywhere by sitting around. Keep that in mind.



astaut
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31 Jan 2011, 1:20 am

High school is more "everybody knows everybody" and often people are kind of settled into their groups/cliques and aren't looking for new friends, and you're kind of reliant on befriending one person to get into the group. That's how I always felt in high school. And if I had a falling out with that one friend then I was left out of the group I was friends with. In college, you're all going to a new place where you don't know people and everyone is looking for a fresh start and to meet new people/make new friends. It's more up to you, but it also seems easier to me. I've had a much better social life in college and met overall more genuine people. But, you have kind of carefully choose the school you go to. It will be easier to make friends at a school with 2000 people than 20,000.


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VincentVanJones
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31 Jan 2011, 4:07 pm

So far I have to say I prefer college. Granted I am at a small school (5000 people) but I have made more friends more quickly in the dorms here then at any time in my life. Oddly enough there seems to be an abnormally high amount of kids with a "past" here in my dorm, so you get very little s**t for being different. People judge you for who you are were I am at. Granted, there are still plenty of shallow people and those whose action make you want to cringe but overall, College > HS (IMO)



d057
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31 Jan 2011, 5:59 pm

astaut wrote:
High school is more "everybody knows everybody" and often people are kind of settled into their groups/cliques and aren't looking for new friends, and you're kind of reliant on befriending one person to get into the group. That's how I always felt in high school. And if I had a falling out with that one friend then I was left out of the group I was friends with. In college, you're all going to a new place where you don't know people and everyone is looking for a fresh start and to meet new people/make new friends. It's more up to you, but it also seems easier to me. I've had a much better social life in college and met overall more genuine people. But, you have kind of carefully choose the school you go to. It will be easier to make friends at a school with 2000 people than 20,000.


I felt the exact same way about college. People spread rumors about me countless times, as a result people believed them. I didn't have friends because people thought that because people heard the rumor, nobody should hang out with me.


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FreeSpirit2000
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12 Feb 2011, 8:26 pm

I go to a community college right now and I feel I have more self esteem and a better social life. I hated and dreaded high school, that is why I got so depressed back then and lost my interest in trying in my classes back then. As I started to gain more self esteem, I started to re-gain my interest in trying in my classes and have been applying myself in my classes for 2 semesters. So far the 1st semester was a 3.0, the 2nd semester plummeted to 3 C's and 1 F because I had a teacher who literally screwed me over big time the previous semester and way being unfair. But I am more happier now and even though I have roadblocks w/ accomplishing my goals, I will hopefully eventually bounce up though.



Mitch901
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20 Mar 2020, 4:27 am

I think that high school is better than college



HacKING
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20 Mar 2020, 12:48 pm

In high school I consistently saw the same people at the same times everyday and through circumstance made friends. In college so far it's not the case and I haven't taken much social initiative.



JD12345
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30 Mar 2020, 4:49 am

Both were a disaster for me. I just couldn't relate to the mindsets of most of my peers. In hindsight perhaps I should have made more effort and/or gotten more help.