Awkwardness with customers. Can't due small talk.

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TrippyRabbit99
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11 Jan 2019, 7:27 pm

I never know what to say to customers I fake a smile and try to make small talk but they always notice something off about me. And they always look uncomfortable. For example I was about to close up and a customer came in last minute I couldn't understand what he said I think he said "having a good night?" But I thought he said have a good night and I said you too and he looked at me funny lol. And then he said "what's wrong with you, are you ready to go?" I said yes...

I'm not sure what the appropriate response would be
I'm going to be beating myself literally and physically for this weird conversation.

Look I'm not good with coming up with small talk out of the blue I can smile and tell you good evening good morning and hello anything beyond that I'm just not going to know what to say.

I never know what people want from me I only realize I didn't do the correct response due to the weird look I get. :(

I've been studying NT behavior for a while now but I'll never be a master at faking it no matter what I do apparently

Does anyone know how to fake being an NT?



BTDT
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11 Jan 2019, 8:01 pm

Just part of being on the spectrum. 8O

I can fake it pretty well now, but I am really good at learning new things. It helps a great deal that I now have a low stress environment living by myself and a have a job with seniority. Each year I get six weeks of paid time off. :D

I had an very social NT partner and we would talk about just about everything, so that helped a lot.



hurtloam
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11 Jan 2019, 9:44 pm

I used to struggle more with this when I was younger.

I had a customer facing job and I often struggled to understand what the customers were trying to communicate to me. I'd often have experiences like what you described above. It used to stress me out.

I've found it easier as the years have gone on. I've become more accustomed to people and their ways. I've learned intellectually by observing people and interacting with them.

I think I can pass as NT now.


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TrippyRabbit99
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13 Jan 2019, 12:16 pm

BTDT wrote:
Just part of being on the spectrum. 8O

I can fake it pretty well now, but I am really good at learning new things. It helps a great deal that I now have a low stress environment living by myself and a have a job with seniority. Each year I get six weeks of paid time off. :D

I had an very social NT partner and we would talk about just about everything, so that helped a lot.



Prometheus18
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13 Jan 2019, 3:01 pm

Personally, I find shy/eccentric women cute/endearing, and I'm not alone in this. As for faking NT behaviour - it's not possible. You can improve your social skills gradually, over time, but you'll never be NT.


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