interview "faux pas" and how to say what the emplo

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I was talking to a potential employer about an interview over the last week or so, and communication sort of dropped off. Now, personally I think it's rude to end an interaction with someone whether it's business or personal by just ignoring them, so I'm not one to just let it go if someone stops talking to me. I sent an email that was very polite and asked if the employer was still interested in meeting me, and she wrote back "Thanks for the reminder, will (X time) work?" Because I didn't know for sure since I'm training at a job I already have and the schedule isn't set yet, I wrote back that at this point I am available and I would let her know if something came up, but hopefully it would remain open. I have heard nothing from her since, not even a simple "Ok," so I don't know if she is still interested and just distracted like before, or maybe was offended by me asking to be penciled in and not saying that I would drop everything to meet her no matter what. It sort of reminds me of a time when I was offered a job a few years back, told them I would think about it and call back to let them know, and then when I did, they told me they gave it to someone else. It seems employers want you to jump at their word and take an offer the minute they give it to you or you're out. How are you supposed to consider your own interests and still keep them happy without outright lying?

That's unprofessional, honestly.

When I was offered my last job, I accepted on the spot and started a couple days later.
My current job, when they made the offer, I wasn't sure, and I asked for a few days to think about it. I ultimately decided to accept and called them back, done and done.
I can't believe they wouldn't at least call you back and go 'we made an offer, but, we're in a hurry and have another candidate, give us your answer now'... ~smh~ As I said, unprofessional.

I think it sounds like she's waiting to hear from you that you are available. It might be worth a shot to call her again. But this time say Yes.

You are wanting to organise an interview. She offers you a time. You are vague about it. The ball is in your court to confirm the time. She's just waiting for you.

You're supposed to act as if you've been waiting your entire life to work at that place in that particular job. Even if it's cleaning up vomit all day long and you intend to quit the next day.

When I was working I was a hiring manager.

Why?

This.

She is waiting on you.

Because, when interviewing, you are competing against others. And hiring managers would (generally) prefer to hire someone who genuinely wants the job they are trying to fill.

This, of course, leads to the next problem. Which is, in a competitive situation, certain people are willing to do and/or say anything to “win” (i.e. get the job). This, of course, includes lying (or simply "stretching" the truth). This puts people who are unwilling to so, at a significant competitive disadvantage. My understanding is that most employers expect people to do this (lie/stretch the truth). Which means, if you do not, you are doubly-screwed.

I know

I just wanted to check what logic people used to explain this implied rule.

It is a silly practice. This is off topic, but I think it's a big problem that a lot of hiring is done by HR people and junior staff who will choose the candidate they want to work with (as in the one that will 'fit in' socially and not pose a threat to their own career) over the candidate with the best record and ability. Of course, there are some jobs where social ability is crucial, particularly representative functions, but the same social standards are applied to positions which do not require them.

Nowadays, I believe that most organizations will choose the candidate they want to work with over the candidate with the best record and ability.

There's a good article on likability here <click>

Gosh that was a depressing read, but yeah, it is my experience as well. Also, looks are very important, at least where I am from. I am not in bad shape, but I am not a conventionally handsome guy. It makes me very self-conscious and depressed when I observe in real life situations how charisma and looks wield such influence.

My sentiments as well...

Yeah, I first realized that in an Interpersonal Relations class. We watched undercover videos of how identical candidates (two men, two women, one of each was extremely attractive)... they all had the same education and experience on their resumes, they all left feeling good, but, only the two attractive people were called back, and the man was offered more money than the woman, but, that's neither here nor there to this convo.
We got statistics on traits that got people more callbacks and more raises and more promotions.
When my friends were helping me with advice on my job search, I mentioned that I also had to budget for more expensive clothes, salon visits and some makeup. They're all like, wtf are you talking about? You don't wear makeup, etc.
I explained that it's a fact that women who wear makeup get more callbacks and more promotions than those who don't. It has nothing to do with my programming skills, but, if it has an impact, I'm darned well gonna do it.
Also, the clothes and haircuts... just trying to hedge my bets... I'm overweight, and people equate that to being lazy or not taking care of oneself, so... expensive clothes can offset vibe about not caring about one's physical self.

It's all a bunch of hooey to me, quality-wise, but, if it means something to impress hr... I'll do it.
(My stubborn husband, on the other hand, wouldn't even pull his long hair back in a ponytail during interviews... don't get me started. "It's a matter of principle" to be oneself, but, principles don't pay the bills... I do.)