How old is too old to not have a career yet?

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King_oni
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16 Nov 2014, 8:36 pm

Nick9075 wrote:
great so I am pretty much screwed. At 39, my Resume is a mess of temp jobs, periods of unemployment no real accoplishments.... So I am basically screwed and it is confirmed by this thread


But from this thread I have the impression it's mostly accomplishments that are dictated by society. How about personal achievements? Things you can be proud of. Why would you care that your neighbour applauds you for whatever you do?



slenkar
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16 Nov 2014, 8:51 pm

Nick9075 wrote:
great so I am pretty much screwed. At 39, my Resume is a mess of temp jobs, periods of unemployment no real accoplishments.... So I am basically screwed and it is confirmed by this thread


Is there vocational rehabilitation for people with aspergers where you live?



Nick9075
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17 Nov 2014, 7:59 am

slenkar wrote:
Nick9075 wrote:
great so I am pretty much screwed. At 39, my Resume is a mess of temp jobs, periods of unemployment no real accoplishments.... So I am basically screwed and it is confirmed by this thread


Is there vocational rehabilitation for people with aspergers where you live?


yes but you still have to get hired. How do people get hired whose Resume is a mess. Reading on this thread that by age 30 you should be settled in a career makes me believe there is no hope. I know that I am responsible for much of my problems due to bad choices, bad decisions etc...



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17 Nov 2014, 1:40 pm

Nick9075 wrote:
slenkar wrote:
Nick9075 wrote:
great so I am pretty much screwed. At 39, my Resume is a mess of temp jobs, periods of unemployment no real accoplishments.... So I am basically screwed and it is confirmed by this thread


Is there vocational rehabilitation for people with aspergers where you live?


yes but you still have to get hired. How do people get hired whose Resume is a mess. Reading on this thread that by age 30 you should be settled in a career makes me believe there is no hope. I know that I am responsible for much of my problems due to bad choices, bad decisions etc...


I don't blame my lack of success academically, career-wise on anyone except myself, although maybe my parents could have disciplined me more in my childhood such as elementary and middle school years, not to say I was a trouble maker.



fragmentaerie
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17 Nov 2014, 3:06 pm

WantToHaveALife wrote:

A lot of people mention joining the military as a way to become seriously disciplined, take your future much more seriously career-wise, but at the same time i'm not interested because I don't want to be away from my family too much, will miss my freedom


I looked at the military and couldn't do it either. I want to know the why of everything- "because I said so" has never worked for me.



WantToHaveALife
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17 Nov 2014, 3:21 pm

fragmentaerie wrote:
WantToHaveALife wrote:

A lot of people mention joining the military as a way to become seriously disciplined, take your future much more seriously career-wise, but at the same time i'm not interested because I don't want to be away from my family too much, will miss my freedom


I looked at the military and couldn't do it either. I want to know the why of everything- "because I said so" has never worked for me.


I heard a quote from somewhere that says "Men are the laborers of life and creators of civilizations" by some Macho guy, but it doesn't surprise me regarding the meaning behind it



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17 Nov 2014, 3:51 pm

WantToHaveALife wrote:

A lot of people mention joining the military as a way to become seriously disciplined, take your future much more seriously career-wise, but at the same time i'm not interested because I don't want to be away from my family too much, will miss my freedom


I looked at the military and couldn't do it either. I want to know the why of everything- "because I said so" has never worked for me.



WantToHaveALife
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19 Nov 2014, 11:09 am

I wonder if it is very common in Aspies to take longer than NT's to become independent, well-established in life, financially stable, etc., is that generally the norm when comparing Aspies to NT's?



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19 Nov 2014, 11:29 am

OP, if you have not already read Tony Attwood's "The Complete Guide to Aspergers", please consider doing that, as he covers this issue and so much more.



WantToHaveALife
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19 Nov 2014, 11:34 am

B19 wrote:
OP, if you have not already read Tony Attwood's "The Complete Guide to Aspergers", please consider doing that, as he covers this issue and so much more.


which chapter in that book does he go over that?



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19 Nov 2014, 11:42 am

Sorry, can't remember which particular chapter. The whole book was helpful to me. Have you read it before?



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19 Nov 2014, 11:44 am

Tony Attwood is an authoritative voice pertaining to Asperger's.



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23 Nov 2014, 3:47 am

Based on this I could very well be somewhat screwed...beings I am 25 on SSI. I mean its like even if I did become functional enough to work..is anyone really going to hire someone over 25 who only has a highschool diploma, is a college drop out and essentially has no work history and has been living of disability income? So yeah but I would hope someday I could figure something else out aside from crappy SSI income.


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King_oni
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23 Nov 2014, 6:00 am

Sweetleaf wrote:
Based on this I could very well be somewhat screwed...beings I am 25 on SSI. I mean its like even if I did become functional enough to work..is anyone really going to hire someone over 25 who only has a highschool diploma, is a college drop out and essentially has no work history and has been living of disability income? So yeah but I would hope someday I could figure something else out aside from crappy SSI income.


That's been on my mind as well recently. 32 and somewhat in the same position. And even my high school diploma I got by attending only exams and essentially turned it into homeschooling myself.

Now I do have an appointment soon to see if I could get into any programmes to see if any of my issues can be resolved/fixed/treated.

By now I kinda figured out what I need to get my stuff sorted out; and that firstly is some kind of qualification so I'm less shafted on the jobmarket. Yet with my meager income and the refusal of the government to offer any support, any form of education is out of the window already; aside from if I actually thrive on standardized courses (but probably would need one that caters to me and the aspie mind in general).

Let's face it, no education (for whatever reason), past your mid 20's with no job experience and it's nigh impossible to compete on the jobmarket; even moreso if you also deal with issues that might require some workplace adjustments.



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23 Nov 2014, 9:26 am

Sweetleaf wrote:
Based on this I could very well be somewhat screwed...beings I am 25 on SSI. I mean its like even if I did become functional enough to work..is anyone really going to hire someone over 25 who only has a highschool diploma, is a college drop out and essentially has no work history and has been living of disability income? So yeah but I would hope someday I could figure something else out aside from crappy SSI income.

I am on SSI too, our ages are sort of close and I have the same credentials as you. The only job I can really think of myself possibly being able to thrive in would be a vet assistant or something with animals (NOT ANIMAL CONTROL). I'm considering trying to go to school again but I really don't know if its even worth trying. I'm really depressed over it.

I tried the military too and got sent home, bootcamp made me worse in terms of my mental illnesses I have.

TO ALL OF YOU POSSIBLY CONSIDERING THE MILITARY (any branch): If you have stuff like tics, stemming etc I would stay far away. People with aspergers do join, but they tend to be far more functional and while they do struggle in bootcamp initially (everyone does) they turn out well. If you have ANY kind of severe mental illness, like depression, bipolar, borderline etc the military will only be a nightmare for you. If you're someone who has trouble getting up to speed you'll get a lot of tough love but it reaches a point where you hinder everyone else in bootcamp because of your screw ups so people will start resenting and isolating you, even hating you, because in bootcamp when ONE person screws up everyone is punished and the eyes have walls, literally.

Every drill sergeant/RDC/whatever the airforce has, is watching you, taking notes on a card and swapping em with their other buddies. Expect endless mind games while you're constantly under the eye of scrutiny.

Its sink or swim, literally. If you screw up and struggle so much the RDC/drill guy (mean guy in charge of your group) is going to put you in special courses that may or may not help you (stuff like handling stress, how to cope etc) but this will also push back your graduation and mean you have to be in boot camp longer and bootcamp is hell, literally. I was in that exact same position and realized how much I missed home, how I was screwing up at everything, my entire ship hated me, bullied me and I was not showing any improvement. I finally came forward to my RDC and told him I had tried to kill myself before and lied about my medical record to get in at the recommendation of my recruiter and I started cutting myself with my razor. I was sent home. I couldn't take it anymore, I was and still am weak.

Yes, you can manage and survive if you have just aspergers. Aspergers and asd are often coupled with other mental illnesses, however.

Contrary to what people may say, the military is NOT for everyone. Yes you will get disciplined heavily but a lot of people I notice are under the false notion that discipline fixes everything, I was this way and thought with my myriad of problems I could be fixed with cold hard discipline. It didn't work.



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23 Nov 2014, 12:08 pm

I am 60 and seriously ill. I am also in the midst of a new career change.[ actually, a couple] It is NEVER too late as long as you are breathing. No one should ever feel that they have to make a career choice when they are young and stick with it for a lifetime.