Board index › Coping in life › Work and finding a Job

Stereotyping me?

Page 1 of 1 [ 11 posts ] 

Previous topic | Next topic

Jamesy
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 24 Oct 2008
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 8,020
Location: Near London United Kingdom

18 Oct 2015, 2:53 pm

At my last place of employment I was given the same job as this other guy in the office with learning difficulties but he had dyspraxia and brain damage. I myself have aspergers and learning difficulties. Overall I worked in a group of 7 people I think in our office section.

The guy with dyspraxia behaved very differently from other people and I made it clear i was unhappy with them, because it felt to me like it was a negative reflection on my behaviour them singling me out from everyone else.

If you could guess did my boss pair us together on the same job because we both behaved identically or because of his preconceived stereotypes of people with learning disabilities?



Marvin_the_Martian
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 12 Oct 2015
Age: 63
Posts: 47
Location: Nevada

18 Oct 2015, 4:39 pm

Jamesy wrote:
If you could guess did my boss pair us together on the same job because we both behaved identically or because of his preconceived stereotypes of people with learning disabilities?


It is impossible for anyone to answer this question given the information you have provided.

Since you are no longer employed there, the question is moot.

I don't see the point of what-if or could-have questions. There are too many indeterminate factors andand in the end, the OP usually winds up feeling bad for something which may or may not have happened.

I think you should drop this issue and move on.



Jamesy
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 24 Oct 2008
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 8,020
Location: Near London United Kingdom

18 Oct 2015, 4:44 pm

Marvin_the_Martian wrote:
Jamesy wrote:
If you could guess did my boss pair us together on the same job because we both behaved identically or because of his preconceived stereotypes of people with learning disabilities?


It is impossible for anyone to answer this question given the information you have provided.

Since you are no longer employed there, the question is moot.

I don't see the point of what-if or could-have questions. There are too many indeterminate factors andand in the end, the OP usually winds up feeling bad for something which may or may not have happened.

I think you should drop this issue and move on.






I just asked the question because I don't get how I come across to others



Fnord
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 May 2008
Age: 67
Gender: Male
Posts: 59,831
Location: Stendec

18 Oct 2015, 5:49 pm

Jamesy wrote:
Marvin_the_Martian wrote:
Jamesy wrote:
If you could guess did my boss pair us together on the same job because we both behaved identically or because of his preconceived stereotypes of people with learning disabilities?
It is impossible for anyone to answer this question given the information you have provided. Since you are no longer employed there, the question is moot. I don't see the point of what-if or could-have questions. There are too many indeterminate factors andand in the end, the OP usually winds up feeling bad for something which may or may not have happened. I think you should drop this issue and move on.
I just asked the question because I don't get how I come across to others
You seem to come across as someone who asks questions about situations that he is no longer involved in, who won't stop asking the same questions until he gets an answer he wants, and who does not understand why people treat him the way they do.


_________________
 
No love for Hamas, Hezbollah, Iranian Leadership, Islamic Jihad, other Islamic terrorist groups, OR their supporters and sympathizers.


kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

19 Oct 2015, 9:30 am

Yeah...the boss probably lumped you both together.



glebel
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 24 Jul 2015
Age: 61
Posts: 1,665
Location: Mountains of Southern California

19 Oct 2015, 10:27 am

He probably did lump you together with him.
That's what people do, categorize and separate into little groupings.


_________________
When everyone is losing their heads except you, maybe you don't understand the situation.


Sweetleaf
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 34,461
Location: Somewhere in Colorado

19 Oct 2015, 10:35 am

I am a bit confused on what exactly it was you were bothered by. Do you mean out of you and the other person with learning disabilities they only criticized your behavior and that bothers you....Or that the other learning disabled person acted a lot more 'different' than you and you don't like the idea they hired you thinking you were going to be exactly identical to them? I guess it comes down to how did they single you out exactly?


_________________
We won't go back.


Jamesy
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 24 Oct 2008
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 8,020
Location: Near London United Kingdom

19 Oct 2015, 11:11 am

Sweetleaf wrote:
I am a bit confused on what exactly it was you were bothered by. Do you mean out of you and the other person with learning disabilities they only criticized your behavior and that bothers you....Or that the other learning disabled person acted a lot more 'different' than you and you don't like the idea they hired you thinking you were going to be exactly identical to them? I guess it comes down to how did they single you out exactly?



I am insecure about how i come across to other people. I jumped to the conclusion that I behaved identical to guy with learning difficulties when they lumped us together and it made me feel really upset.



SocOfAutism
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 2 Mar 2015
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,848

20 Oct 2015, 12:14 pm

It sounds like you were offended at the thought that other people might think you're similar to this other guy. You're kind of inferring that you're better than him.

I agree that we can't give you an answer from the information you gave, but from your posting history it does seem that you're too self conscious about the judgment of others. Who cares? Everyone is different. If a particular person has or doesn't have an opinion it has nothing to do with you.



Jamesy
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 24 Oct 2008
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 8,020
Location: Near London United Kingdom

21 Oct 2015, 10:32 am

SocOfAutism wrote:
It sounds like you were offended at the thought that other people might think you're similar to this other guy. You're kind of inferring that you're better than him.

I agree that we can't give you an answer from the information you gave, but from your posting history it does seem that you're too self conscious about the judgment of others. Who cares? Everyone is different. If a particular person has or doesn't have an opinion it has nothing to do with you.




If you could guess how do you think my boss felt when I blew his cover?



Fnord
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 May 2008
Age: 67
Gender: Male
Posts: 59,831
Location: Stendec

21 Oct 2015, 12:21 pm

Jamesy wrote:
If you could guess how do you think my boss felt when I blew his cover?
Ask the doctor whose cover you blew. No one here has the vaguest idea of how your doctor felt.

I agree with SOA. You seem too self-conscious about the judgements, thoughts, and feelings of others; and I also think that you would be better off to drop this issue and move on.


_________________
 
No love for Hamas, Hezbollah, Iranian Leadership, Islamic Jihad, other Islamic terrorist groups, OR their supporters and sympathizers.